1. Have an Interesting Snippet to Share : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

Buttering Up The Spooks

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Balajee, Sep 27, 2022.

  1. Balajee

    Balajee IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,436
    Likes Received:
    4,374
    Trophy Points:
    338
    Gender:
    Male

    BUTTERING UP THE SPOOKS
    There are lot of times when I feel like an atheist lamb besieged by theist wolves. While my immediate family, my wife and daughter, give a damn for religion, I have a menagerie (that is the best way to describe them) of relatives who are worried about my soul and want me to do everything that would enable it to go to heaven after I kick the bucket and not to hell. So the siege by these theistic wolves intensifies every time the hindu "holy" period of Mahalaya approaches..
    So during Mahalaya when one is supposed to butter up our long dead and gone ancestors, I was sent messages by some kin through a third party (because I don’t bother to remain in contact with them), that pithru dosha (in plain English it means pissing off the dear and not so dear departed) is very dangerous. Even gods can be forgiving but these chaps are vindictive with a big V. So I must perform the proper rituals to placate the dead and gone.
    If you thought that the goners are goners, then think again. According to believers, if they are not buttered up during the mahalaya period and in that process the bank account of some priest is not fattened, all kind of evil can befall me.
    The dead according to my gullible oops sorry devout relatives live in a planet called Pithru Loka (will anyone tell me in which solar system this planet is located?) . If they are not taken care of through rites and offerings of food regularly, particularly during the Mahalaya period, they can go ballistic and wreak havoc.
    Scary, isn’t it? After all who would want their life to be turned into a horror reality show.? Ancestors a k a ghosts can come to haunt you if you don’t perform rituals to keep them in their own world. Haven’t you seen those horror movies and shows which give you valuable information about how spooks can make your life miserable? I always make it a point to watch them. They provide more laughs than comedy shows.
    The best part of these movies/shows is when a sexy ghost (female of course, or do you think I am gay?) in a transparent nightgown carrying a candle sings a come hither song. And the scariest part is when the filmmaker switches on the fog machine to prevent you from getting the full benefit of all that transparency.
    Now wouldn’t it be great if the spooks land up here and one in a transparent nightgown sings a come hither song to you after you fail to placate them ? That would be great without the interference of spoilsport movie directors.switching on the fog machine.
    Aw come on. Let us get serious. Their world as I have already said, is called Pithru Loka. And Pithru comes from Pita no not the bread but Sanskrit/Hindi for dad. Obviously it is a male-dominated world. Either the women after kicking the bucket, undergo a sex change operation to become males and enter the world or they are kept under the thumbs of male spooks. Either way, there is no chance of a sexy ghost in a filmsy nightgown. And if you don’t want a very hairy male ghost in a nightgown singing a come hither song to you, better perform the proper rituals.(BTW what happened to good ol’ karma and rebirth? Aren’t these guys ever born again?)
    When I elaborated on these points before a lupine theist relative, he flared up and said I would only go to hell for such irreverence. Ignorant guy! He doesn’t understand the perks hell, if it exists has to offer. All sinful Bolly/Holly starlets and Playboy bunnies are bound to land up there and you will get an eyeful to ogle at and if you are more enterprising, you can have roaring affairs. I would probably run into quite a few of my forefathers and foremoms in hell (Quite a few of them were lawyers and so they must have landed up only there).
    Heaven? Yuck! I am sure apsaras like Rambha, Oorvasi and Menaka must be millennia old and that must be showing on their performances either on the dance stage or elsewhere. And getting billeted with them is not the worst case scenario. What if you are put up with say Mahatma Gandhi? The other heavenly possibility is you suffer hellish boredom by hosannaing the almighty for eternity. Not worth it pal.
    The best case scenario is becoming a ghost and haunting the earth. And believe me I would be a very scary ghost. My singing come hither songs or otherwise would send a chill down everyone’s spine. My singing scares the **** out of people even now. My sole service to theism is my bathroom singing. Then only my family remembers God as the daughter and wife bang the bathroom door and yell “For God’s sake stop!”
    As for transparent nightgowns.. who the hell do you think I am? Pass my jeans and tees please!
     
    Viswamitra likes this.
    Loading...

  2. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,993
    Likes Received:
    2,222
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Male
    The other day I watched a short movie directed by Sam Benegal-Amaravati ki Kahaniya. The kid boy has a fever. All other efforts fail. The father visits the family temple and promises to sacrifice the lamb so dearly loved by the kid if he recovers. The kid recovers and the promise has to be kept. Somehow the kid agrees because if the promise is not kept the family may have to suffer, and accompanies his father with the lamb. They mix in the crowd and the kid manages to free the lamb. Rest is left to our imagination.
    It is too difficult to say who won, the Faith of the parents or the Kid's love for the lamb.
     
  3. beautifullife30

    beautifullife30 Finest Post Winner

    Messages:
    1,166
    Likes Received:
    2,352
    Trophy Points:
    285
    Gender:
    Female
    How does butter up the spooks? Or is it so easy to butter them up and get away with whatever we want? Are they so gullible and naïve so as to believe anything and everything that people do?

    I dont know.

    My paternal grandfather was no more by the time i was born. I always always longed to see him and know him. My dad also used to tell me how he would have treasured me since i was the first grand daughter in the family and he used to love girls. All this added to the already longing mind of a 6 year old and i used to tell me dad i that i wished he was there to see me. And my dad used to say that he does see me and that he comes down every year during pitru pakshalu just to see me and my sister and check on us and dot on us. And that during to those days he would just stay beside us.

    As i grew, these days became a time for self introspection and a heartfelt chat with them. I spoke to them as to how i felt and what i was going through. Not to ease my burden but to help give me strength to see the right path to navigate during these times. I am sure they would have faced a similar situation in their life and i just wanted them to help me guide through those times.

    Sadly in my case, my children never go to know their grandfather too. My dad died when i was 7 months pregnant with my child. And i named my elder son child after my dad. Till then, pitru pakshalu was about being good trying to know my grandfather but since then it became primarily about my dad.

    For me, my dad had to be beside me. I always thought that he was. But during pitru pakshalu time, i knew that he was. After my dad's demise, i ensured to do annadanam, feed cows, feed birds - i say birds coz though we feed it for the crows, there are monkeys, sparrows and other birds which usually eat them, it is actually gratifying to any or all life forms fill their hunger, giving away clothes and other things.

    I never for once thought that i was buttering them up by giving these away. For me, my dad was there in every single cow, every single crow, every single person i gave those clothes away to. I felt my dad ate to his heart's content when a crow or a monkey ate the food we kept out for them.

    This year specially has been a hard one for me. After 12 years, i came back to my village to reclaim my fathers share of property. In spite of not having much money to spare and time to do all that, we ensured that the house that he built for us was restored and renovated. We have actually started living in our house in the village since last month.

    So this pakshalu, i felt, i could wait for my dad, grandma, and grandpa holding my head up high. I hope i have lived up to what they wanted to me do. You see what i wanted to do was just ignore all these fights and give up the property and live my life in peace but somehow the situations that happened in my life so far were so different. I am sure my grandfather, father and my grandmom had a hand in showing me or telling me that they wanted me to do here. I did it. i fought against all odds and i am actually still fighting but i am glad i did what they wanted.

    In my heart i sincerely believe that all my near and dear who have attained sadgathi come down to see how we are doing and help guide us through tough times. Why would anyone leave their child in lurch right? No matter where they are, i refuse to believe that if i am trouble my dad, grandma and grandpa wouldnt help me through.

    My entire life i have believed them to be there beside me. Maybe or not there was a reason why our forefathers marked these days as the days for the departed. Maybe they felt, if these days are not set, then humanity would probably swallowed up in selfishness of living their life. This was probably a way for making us go charity and good deeds if maybe not for the departed, atleast for the sake to ensuring that we share what we have. A period to stop brooding over our looks, our life and a chance to introspect them to see if we are actually living a good life in terms of giving and sharing and growing as a community.

    I dont care if thadhinams cant be kept by girls, or if women are not allowed to do certain rituals or that women are not included. As i said, i do my bit by involving myself in cooking what they want, feeding different lifeforms in the manner i know, sharing what i have with people who need them at the moment and introspecting myself. I truly believe i have done more that what a male child in my place would have done and i am sure my dad feels the same. If not, then i wont let him go until he hears the end of it from me :).
     
    Laks09, sum14, Rihana and 3 others like this.
  4. Balajee

    Balajee IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,436
    Likes Received:
    4,374
    Trophy Points:
    338
    Gender:
    Male
    Wow what a serious philosophical dissertation on a humorous piece! You don't need ancestors or believe they are vesides you to lead a good life and share whatever you can. Nor do you need a ritual period for it. As Confucius said " We have to be good because we are humans|.
     
    beautifullife30 likes this.
  5. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan Finest Post Winner

    Messages:
    9,842
    Likes Received:
    10,680
    Trophy Points:
    490
    Gender:
    Male
    Beautiful I second here this response conceived in time and just pre for FP nomination for the current outgoing month.
    God Bless through pithrus.
     
  6. beautifullife30

    beautifullife30 Finest Post Winner

    Messages:
    1,166
    Likes Received:
    2,352
    Trophy Points:
    285
    Gender:
    Female
    haha...you crack me up!

    If i can follow what a chinese philosopher said why should i not follow what my dad, grandfather, and his grandfather and the long line people before him have been following for ages?

    Maybe what they did has little meaning to a person who is swimming in science and bathing in technology. But to me, when i do what they did, it makes me one with them. By some random coincidence, it has now come that point where my family's way of things are to be taken forward by me through my children. I can either choose to diss it or take it forward.

    I take it forward. I feel good doing it! I work in a MNC for 10 hours, manage a house, have two children whose needs to have to monitored constantly and in all these, taking the easy way out is the best option but i dont want to do it just coz it is easy.

    Maybe what rituals are there are senseless and meaningless to some but to me they are the rituals, the same ones that were done by my family for generations together. Why not carry it through?. I feel a connect with my entire family going all the way up to Subbabattulu (my many greats grandfather) when i do it. The same connect i feel when i recite Aditya Hridayam standing under the sun which i believe goes all the way back up to Rama.

    To me, Rama is real. He lived, breathed many thousands of years ago. And when he was down, he had Agastya muni come forward and give him a little encouragement in the form of this sloka. And specially this line.....

    "Asmin kshane mahabaaho ravanam tvam vadhishyasi"

    Imagine that encouragement given to a person who is tired and exhausted. It would mean the world and they would indeed conquer the world and that Rama did. And i feel the same amount of encouragement and peace as if sage Agastya spoke to me.

    Even if there is nothing or nobody who can lend you a shoulder to cry or an ear to listen, i always know that i have them on my side to listen to me. Sometimes that one belief is all i need to get me going.
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2022
    Laks09, sum14, Rihana and 2 others like this.
  7. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan Finest Post Winner

    Messages:
    9,842
    Likes Received:
    10,680
    Trophy Points:
    490
    Gender:
    Male
    Here i grant you
    upload_2022-9-29_16-56-20.jpeg
     
    Rihana and beautifullife30 like this.
  8. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    12,621
    Likes Received:
    22,610
    Trophy Points:
    538
    Gender:
    Male
    You really made me laugh so much especially after I just recovered from the stress of preparing for the hurricane Ian. All those night gown ghosts are not real and they are all imaginations of the directors of movies to make more people see the movies. In reall life, the ghosts are not visible and have a spooky way of throwing down things to the ground or moving the bed in which you sleep. They don't sing for you but are ready to enter your body to make you do whatever the hell they want to do. But ghost life is not an easy one.

    I probably learned from a different school of thought than your relatives. I was told pithru prayers are making an offering to them so that they can get relieved from a difficult Pitru Lokha life and reach heaven (I don't know where it is!) and give a lot of goodies for us in return. I am repeatedly told that praying to the ancestors during Mahalaya period is important because they come down to earth hoping their dear and near will help them. Such prayers are intended to help the ancestors.

    What makes you think you would come across only boring people in Swarga? Moreover, no one ages in Swarga and hence Urvasi, Ramba and Menaka remain young. You get to drink Amrita and remain young always without all your efforts to do diet and exercise!

    Your snippet requesting the directors not to switch on the fog machine made me remember a joke. A guy was watching a movie 100th time as he saw a woman having shower besides a moving train with the hope that someday the train will come late.

    If you don't believe in feeding your ancestors, you can feed the birds and animals and at least they will bless you. They are definitely not going to disturbe you as they probably know you were not going to perform rituals. Mahalaya is only 15 days in a year and only one day we are supposed to perform rituals for them and give away gifts.
     
    Thyagarajan and Balajee like this.
  9. Balajee

    Balajee IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,436
    Likes Received:
    4,374
    Trophy Points:
    338
    Gender:
    Male
    De
     
    Thyagarajan and Viswamitra like this.
  10. Balajee

    Balajee IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,436
    Likes Received:
    4,374
    Trophy Points:
    338
    Gender:
    Male
    Dear Viswa, Apsaras might be forever young but is there any guarantee that their dance steps would not remain the same? If they didn't change with times inhabitants of Swarga would suffer from a bad sense of Deja vu and what was once heavenly entertainment would become hellish boredom,. Looks like pihthruloka t5he midway stop to heaven, is short or totally bereft of provisions that these spooks look to humans for sustenance. I must say that is highly irresponsible on the part of those who run the divine bureaucracy. As for movie ghosts, if fog machine had to be switched on, there i would be no point in transparent nightgowns.,
     
    Viswamitra likes this.

Share This Page