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Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Induslady, Mar 1, 2014.

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  1. Mar 1, 2014 #1
    Induslady

    Induslady Administrator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear All,

    If you had been a regular visitor of the Indusladies married life and relationship with in-laws forum you would noticed that many discussions are about members asking for help and support with relationship issues, after the fact. You all offer excellent support for them.

    I didn't want us to stop with just providing reactive support once the damage is done. I wanted to steer our community to be more pro-active in helping our members build a strong marriage.

    As an initial step, I started this initiative calling for contributions on what wives can do for a strong marriage. Many of our community members answered the call and responded with some excellent contributions (read all of them here) that generated several pro-active discussions.

    But, I didn't want it to be a one-time thing. We all know well that building a strong marriage is a continuous process and it has many dimensions to it. So, I was wondering where we go from this initial step. Here is what I thought..

    Building strong marriages...
    Every month, we take one theme on building a strong marriage. And we can invite member contributions on that theme. It doesn't have to be a line list of do's and don't. We can explore stories, articles, personal experiences, anecdotes, snippets etc to mix it up. The best contributions from those can go into updated versions of our community guide "What Wives Can Do For a Strong Marriage".

    Themes to explore...
    Building strong marriages need work on multiple fronts. Here are some of the themes that we can explore in the coming months..
    ---- Creating space in marriage
    ---- Finding common interests and shared passions
    ---- Look for the BEST in each other
    ---- Sharing household chores
    ---- Forgiving
    ---- Aligning on parenting philosophy
    ---- Having reliable girl-friends
    ---- Roles and boundaries for extended-family
    ---- Effective communication
    ---- Empathizing with extended family
    ---- Family value system
    ---- Building mutual respect and equality
    ---- Building consensus approach on money
    ---- Handling disagreements
    ---- Keeping romance alive

    Your Feedback...
    So, what do you think? Please provide your input and suggestions below. I am still tied-up on some of the technical challenges so I am going to take march to gather your input and we can start this from April onwards.

    I look forward to all your support in this ongoing endeavor in helping our members build strong marriages.
     
    Induslady, Mar 1, 2014
    Induslady, Mar 1, 2014
    #1
    Sandyr46, Iniyagirl, memeera1234 and 20 others like this.
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  2. Mar 1, 2014 #2
    anmolhai

    anmolhai Platinum IL'ite

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    I think its a great idea. I know I am always open to learning new things specially if its going to strengthen important relationships in my life. You have really good list going here and if I came up with something else, I will definitely post.

    Thank you for all that you do for these forums.
     
    anmolhai, Mar 1, 2014
    anmolhai, Mar 1, 2014
    #2
    2 people like this.
  3. Mar 2, 2014 #3
    SreeSri

    SreeSri Gold IL'ite

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    While targeting the clean watered Ganga river, we also keep diluting those sources of mud to spoil the purity of the Ganga water. If not, you keep cleaning the water while mindless may contribute the negativity in parallel.
    I appreciate your direction.
     
    SreeSri, Mar 2, 2014
    SreeSri, Mar 2, 2014
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  4. Jan 8, 2015 #4
    Durga18

    Durga18 Silver IL'ite

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    This is a very good initiative. Its like "Prevention is better than cure". Most of us don't know these kind of things when we get married. We learn many things from our experiences. Sometimes, when we look back, we feel guilty and we feel like" why didn't i know all these before". Sometimes some damage might be done to our relationships because of our ignorance. All of us will definetly gain a lot from these kind of discussions.
     
    Durga18, Jan 8, 2015
    Durga18, Jan 8, 2015
    #4
    coolgal123, Anvitha and Induslady like this.
  5. Jan 8, 2015 #5
    confusedwoman

    confusedwoman Silver IL'ite

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    This seems a great idea :thumbsup
     
    confusedwoman, Jan 8, 2015
    confusedwoman, Jan 8, 2015
    #5
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  6. Jan 8, 2015 #6
    vidhyalakshmid

    vidhyalakshmid IL Hall of Fame

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    Well said! You covered almost all the points. Very important subject to introspect and explore. Kudos Indus Lady!
     
    vidhyalakshmid, Jan 8, 2015
    vidhyalakshmid, Jan 8, 2015
    #6
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  7. Oct 28, 2015 #7
    sakthi2014

    sakthi2014 New IL'ite

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    Women and Men are Equal , Men can not succeed without women.

    WoMEN
    FEMALE
    MR    SSHE
    GOD    ESS
     
    sakthi2014, Oct 28, 2015
    sakthi2014, Oct 28, 2015
    #7
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  8. Dec 4, 2015 #8
    shilpapapisetty

    shilpapapisetty New IL'ite

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    women nd men both are equal nd men should nt dominate women.. both haveveqal rights.
     
    shilpapapisetty, Dec 4, 2015
    shilpapapisetty, Dec 4, 2015
    #8
  9. Dec 28, 2015 #9
    lakshmikguru

    lakshmikguru Gold IL'ite

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    its a good things for IL friends to learn a lot by discussions.

    your statement is 100% correct @shilpapapisetty.But,most of the mens not agree to this.
     
    lakshmikguru, Dec 28, 2015
    lakshmikguru, Dec 28, 2015
    #9
  10. Dec 30, 2015 #10
    USA2Elsewhere

    USA2Elsewhere New IL'ite

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    I have been in situations where the women had chosen different roles from the men. For example, the women did all the food prep and clean up while the men just sat around and enjoyed themselves. Also I have been in situations where the woman and man are all equals -- equally responsible to provide money, equally responsible for domestic work and childcare, etc.. I will never again be a party to the former. I need to be with people who believe that no choice is based on gender. Gender is only a factor where heavy male physical labor is needed, females need to carry and bear children and then the only choice based on gender is whether or not to breast feed and of course the woman must take part in this. I will never again be in an unequal situation and for those in denial, the person who earns the money has the legal and secular power.
     
    USA2Elsewhere, Dec 30, 2015
    USA2Elsewhere, Dec 30, 2015
    #10
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