Bring the best and worst of your Mother-In-Law...

iyerponnu · Nov 24, 2011

Three best qualities:

1. Her generosity; My mom-in-law is extremely generous and people (family and otherwise) tend to take advantage of that!! We all tease her that though she is usually very careful about everything, all it needs for her to loosen her purse strings is for someone to come to her with a sob story :rotfl
2. She is very thorough in what she does..be it small or big, she likes to be perfect in that! She expects others to be perfect like her too
3. Her will power, that is something I admire a lot in her. Luckily for me both my mom and my mom-in-law seem to be endowed with this quality in abundance

Three worst or should I say three qualities of her that I dont like:

1. Her self praising, she can praise herself non-stop..for what she did for her parents, her husband, her son, her in-laws, her siblings, their children...and now me!! (She often talks about how much she struggled to bring me up )
2. Her expectations - she has done a lot, but also expects a lot. She always expects people to thank her and fall at her feet for anything she has done for them..
3. Her formality - She is very very very formal... with anyone and everyone, with us, her husband, my parents, her siblings...It can get really annoying and often the cause of issues. Everyone in the extended family is now terrified of my mom-in-law and her formal nature!! And she complains that no one wants to meet them or see them anymore...:hide:

Mythili

SriGeetha · Nov 24, 2011

When reading ur thread post's title , I was thinking you must have got very good Mother in your MIL, only when person has got such an healthy relationship, can think of such thread .:bowdown to your MIL

Your reply on how ur MIL inspires you proved me right Hope you carry same for your DIL too ,am asuming you have a son or would have in near future.:thumbsup

Though mine MIL is totally antonynm from urs, have already decided to be like your MIL when my turn comes . I am blessed with good son, so why not I be a good MIL . :bowdown to my MIL for me to come to such decision.

spuppala · Nov 24, 2011

blessed said: ↑

Yew... I am the first one to reply.... here it goes,,

Click to expand...

Hi Blessed,

your username sounds cool
Welcome to the thread and am happy to see your enthusiastic response :thumbsup

Well,i really loved that quality in your MIL-cleanliness..I guess she can be matched to that of my DH.He tortures me literally in this one aspect.He washes the washed utensils always:rotfl

Vow lots of stuff to learn from your MIL dear..Dressing according to the occasion is very important.even my MIL does that always..She is very beautiful and drape sarees nicely..Most of accolades go to her if we go for any parties,functions together u know!!

Hmmm..well looking at the bad qualities,i know you would have got hurt so many times hearing that.Just try to soften her by explaining how much it hurts when she bad mouth your family members..Did you ever tried this?

and for the second quality,better leave her like that and let your FIL suffer no harm to us ..na??

Third one sounds very funny ...be proud that she tries to imitate you!!!Then what else..she is just feeling egoistic to praise you thats all But you can try to get a accolade form her by praising her for her good qualities..Am sure you will get a return piece

Nice to hear about your MIL...Keep coming to this thread

spuppala · Nov 24, 2011

Hi Sripree,

No words to say after reading the wonderful saga of your MIL..Blessed are you to have a charming person in your family..She is a real inspiration gal...in terms of supporting themselves after having a marriage against their family members..Good commitment..

I wish you should get some good time to understand and learn more form your dearest MIL...Yes she gave her best to your partner..Now it is your turn to give your best to them in their old age !!

sushmavja · Nov 24, 2011

sp,a lovely thread.i can list out more than 3 good qualities about her and regarding the bad qualities i think each one has them as no one is perfect and each person has their own flaws.also it depends on our mindset if its wrong or right.about her good qualities:1.she is very very encouraging person.because of various problems i was not very particular in working after the baby.she always extended her support and encouragement.she took care of my DD and my Sils DD who were 1.8 months and 1 yr old resp only with my Fils help.never ever complained about anything the kids did.i myself used to get frustrated after coming home from office and tantrums from kids but she never did.now since these two kids have grown up,she is taking care of my sils son.now also she feels bad that she is not able to raise up my DD.2.she always looks fresh which i try to be but can never be because of my laziness 3.she is not that educated but she learns by seeing.she uses thd microwave,blenders,coffee making m/c all with ease where as i really donno their operations fully. 4. she keeps the house very neat even my DH is like that which passed on to my DD too. 4. she cooks keeping the favourites of each person say me/DH/sil in mind their fav stuff. 5. she is very flexible.say if we are not able to do some puja it can be skipped. no hard and fast rules about it. 6. she loves her son a lot so she likes me too and loves my DD too.cmg to negative thing,only i feel bad is that she wants a baby boy for us n she expects that.i dont really know how to change her mindset regarding this.my DH is the only son in entire family so its natural to expect a grand son but am really worried about this.

spuppala · Nov 24, 2011

Hi Sush,

Wow...I appreciate you for your kind heart to see notice these many good qualities in your MIL...Kudos to you dear!!

Yes,she should be definitely praised for rising up two kids simultaneously at this age..Managing two kids is not an easy task..!!At this age also she is working continuously for the better future of their sons and DILs..Good to hear..And yes we will really get frustrated if they complain about small small things as soon as we come from work.. good to hear that she never complained ..

Hmmm...well she is very much updated in using the modern kitchen appliances...Am sure she can be very flexible where ever she goes..

Also I liked her quality in allowing you to skip your poojas and all when required,,, This suits to me
Guess you had a very smooth journey so far with this wonderful personality in your life..Believe me,As long as we don;t complain about our in-laws our relation with DH would be super soft

Hmm..it's natural that every MIL wants to have a grandson as they feel that their family should get extended..But as long as they don't abuse us for that reason,its better to ignore instead of arguing with them..It is God's decision and no body can do anything..

Wish you good luck and for your MIL too to have her grand son soon

spuppala · Nov 24, 2011

SriGeetha said: ↑

When reading ur thread post's title , I was thinking you must have got very good Mother in your MIL, only when person has got such an healthy relationship, can think of such thread .:bowdown to your MIL

Your reply on how ur MIL inspires you proved me right Hope you carry same for your DIL too ,am asuming you have a son or would have in near future.:thumbsup

Though mine MIL is totally antonynm from urs, have already decided to be like your MIL when my turn comes . I am blessed with good son, so why not I be a good MIL . :bowdown to my MIL for me to come to such decision.
Click to expand...

thanks dear for coming to the thread..

Yes I have a very good MIL who doesn't interfere much in to our affairs and give us some personal spaceYes I will sure carry those qualities to be a good MIL in future

Hmm..you have escaped from answering about your MIL Just kidding..
Happy to hear about your decision to be a good MIL

spuppala · Nov 24, 2011

Hi Mythili ji,

Very interesting to know about your Mother by law ..

The quality which attracted me more is her generosity.. Hmm...she is Mrs.Perfect then Well I guess that you have missed to become a Mrs Bahu Perfect

HAHA..self praising is one thing in which I find lots of fun..Its okay leave her like that..might be your FIL won't praise her enough Anyhow it won't us harm us in any way

Hmmm..being formal is one thing which I too don;t like..If they behave in that way we don;t get that feel of belongingness ...I hope she is not formal with her son atleast!!

SallyR · Nov 24, 2011

Good qualities:
1. Very loving...she is really a affectionate person. Loved by everyone around her.
2. Hard working...she is a very active woman, who can't stay still.
3. Smart...she is a well-educated smart lady...retired now but she used to be really good at what she did. You still hear praises from people she used to work with.

Qualities that I don't like (not necessarily bad qualities):
1. Her advices...she loves to advice us about how to do things. I find it really annoying.
2. Personal wellbeing...she does look after herself (eats healthy, good personal hygiene, etc.) but plays down all her symptoms and ailments...she keeps working even with pain...she doesn't like people spending money for her health.
3. Doesn't like her son helping me around the house...she doesn't complain but she'll come forward and start doing things he was doing and ask him to rest. She spoils her husband & if I let her she'll spoil my husband too!

Overall she is a fantastic lady!

lakshmipavi · Nov 24, 2011

advantages...........
1.MIL watches the cricket matches fully,whether it is test match r one day........
2.appreciates all the work...........
3.dress up neatly wherever she goes.........