Blonde's year in review

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by roopadadia, Jan 16, 2008.

  1. roopadadia

    roopadadia Silver IL'ite

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    A Blonde's Year in Review

    January

    Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

    February

    Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.....

    Helllloooo!!!.......bottles won't fit in printer !!!

    March

    Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months..... box said '2-4 years!'

    April

    Trapped on escalator for hours ... power went out!!!

    May

    Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

    June

    Tried to go water skiing.......couldn't find a lake with a slope.

    July

    Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

    August

    Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....

    car swamped because soft-top was open.

    September

    The capital of California is 'C'.....isn't it???

    October

    Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel.

    November

    Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days .. instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!

    December

    Couldn't call 911 . 'duh'.....there's no 'eleven' button on the stupid phone!!!


    THE BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR - SO FAR

    A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.

    She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house.

    A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

    As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

    Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, 'Is something wrong?'

    To which she replied, 'There certainly is!'

    (Are you ready? This is a beauty..)

    "My stupid computer keeps saying, 'YOU'VE GOT MAIL!'
     
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