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Binders!

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Srama, Nov 2, 2020.

  1. Srama

    Srama IL Hall of Fame

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    I start my yoga practice at 5.30 in the morning and just as I hear the instructor go “No extra breathing, no extra movement” pop comes the ad “do you want to be a yoga teacher?”. I mutter, I even curse I think, debating staying put in the pose for 20 more seconds versus bringing in that extra movement! Do you see the irony of the ad? All I am trying to do is get a practice in place – same time, same place. That’s all. Please allow me! Almost all the time I choose the latter of course, choose to get up and skip ads. Oh, come on! You should also consider the difficulty of the pose I am in This happens day after day after day and I tell you what, I am building patience with the pop-ups and my own attitude. Now I understand that sometimes there is going to be extra breathing, extra movement. The challenge is keeping that breath controlled no matter what! Why I choose youtube for a practice is a different story and we can talk about it later.

    As I drive to work, it is drizzling. I have had a good start to the day. The colors on the trees look even more spectacular on a cloudy day – perhaps it is the eyes of a photographer. I always feel the brightness of the sun subdues the beauty of the world. I agree we feel good inside with that sun though. But then we also learn to take it for granted and seek him when he is not there. That irony again I tell you. Don’t get me wrong – I love love sun but sometimes beauty can be found without sun too. How else would you begin to brace for winters tell me?

    The drizzle is spectacular, you know that mist against your car. How I wish it was against my face. Just the other day while doing dishes, water suddenly splashed on to my face and the joy I felt!!Fallen leaves are getting blown away from here to there, from this neighbor to that with that wind, colorful leaves peeping down from the branches knowing well that they would be there on the ground soon. There are heaps of leaves raked and left on the sides of the streets, soaking up the little droplets, the cloudy skies adding to the beauty of the surroundings. I wish I could be walking rather than driving but here I am appreciating the drive! As I enjoy the roller coaster road, trees appear and disappear, cars appear and disappear, and I do notice signs like “Love thy neighbor”,“ Unity over diversity” among many other signs!

    I do not know why; the lovely morning reminds me of my grandmother. Perhaps it is the scattered signs on the streets urging people to be kind, trying to bring people closer and together. I think of all the summers spent with her. Anytime, we visited her, there would always be another cousin or two or four visiting, not to mention other aunts and uncles and relatives not known to me or relatives that I cannot connect with dots. It was always a full house and it helped us get to know other members of the extended family. It is thanks to her that even today I am in touch with a lot of extended family.

    Don’t even get me talking about those summers. Oh those days! Sitting around her in a semicircle for lunch with our out stretched hands for that bisibelebhath thuthu (morsel) as we quickly gobbled it up only to extend our hand again, always watching if other cousins got a tad bit more than you! All of us were drawn to the house because of her. It was just not just her ancestral home, the same thing happened when she visited any of her kids’ houses – everyone would invariably come to see her! It kept our families together as all differences were dropped in the name of grandmother, for grandmother. She was the matriarch of the family. She was the magnet that drew us all under one roof.

    Talking with a friend that same evening about her I was pleasantly surprised when I heard her say “Some people are binders, S”! They just know how to bind families together. You were fortunate to have one. I think about it. Binders – what a beautiful word. Look at our paper binders, similar papers or different, they are all bound, keeping it all together no matter what is written on each sheet or not! Perhaps all the signs that I saw on my drive to work were doing just that – trying to bind people, no matter the circumstances.

    I sit in my class – I know I have a busy day. But the truth is I need to get in those 3 hours for myself without any guilt. The running around will always be there. So, I drop everything else that I am doing, everything else that is supposed to be important, everything else that is needed to make my day easier and sit down in the class. I have to say, that is the best thing I have done. The joy of spending time the way I wanted and not running after things, made my day even better. The chores left behind did not seem like chores at all

    I think of my grandmother again, she was never quiet even for a moment – even at her weakest self she would make those Indian wicks for god to light a lamp not once complaining about her inability to help people with her ayurvedic medicine like she used to, still giving us her grandchildren and our children some leham,some kashayam when needed. Her inner world was always quiet, despite all the challenges of living, she had mastered that. I think that is what drew all of us to her, wanting a piece of that mastery for our own selves perhaps even wanting to learn to be a binder!
     
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2020
    sindmani, Viswamitra, shravs3 and 5 others like this.
  2. Mistt

    Mistt IL Hall of Fame

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    As usual, very Nice snippet @Srama. loved your narration and I feel myself while reading some of the lines those express beauty of nature. Good to know about your grandma and her attitude has given me inspiration for many things. Take care
     
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  3. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    What a recall and narration, Srama! One of the best of your writings. And that is a tough best to achieve given that all are written from the heart and touch the reader's heart.

    I'll be back later to write more.
     
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  4. Srama

    Srama IL Hall of Fame

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    Thank you @Mistt for your feedback. I do see your lovely nature pictures and not at all surprised that you could relate.
     
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  5. Srama

    Srama IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Rihana @Rihana

    Thank you for that spontaneous response. I look forward to hearing back from you - I am actually quite excited about it knowing how beautifully you write. I try to write like a person with writing experience but heart it is for me :)
     
  6. shyamala1234

    shyamala1234 Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Sabitha,
    You too are a binder connecting various present things to way back to childhood memories!!!!
    Yes....coomercials are pain when doing or watching something serious. While cooking I put on music or some stotras , like Priya sisters a lot. When they are going smooth flow and creating calmness then suddenly pops up....win one crore rupees in a lottery or some jewellers advertisement. In the middle of cooking you cannot press "Skip Ads" again and again!!!
    There are binders in every family....bonding with everyone ...from a kid to an niece, nephew, children everyone. They know how to deal with every situation. They are like a thread in a mala of pearls! Remain in people's heart forever. They need not read Dale Carnegie.
    When visiting grandmother's place in summer vacation (that was our only travelling in those days, no exotic places) she used to make hot rice. Mix it with mango pickle or Gongura pickle and all grandchildren sit around her and serve it making muddalu ( what is equivalent in English). And then yogurt rice. How we used to relish...more than any fancy breakfast. Then her bath, puja and cooking detailed meal!
    I too went back to nostalgia!
    Thank you Sabita.
    Syamala
     
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  7. Srama

    Srama IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Syamala,

    Thank you as always for your warm feedback as always. You are right about binders in each family - only in retrospect do we relaize what binders can do or did! You describe them so well. Summer vacations always bring such warm memories for all of us. I think we lucked out more in that area with such wonderful memories.

    That certainly brought a smile!
     
  8. Balajee

    Balajee IL Hall of Fame

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    You have a genius for associating ideas that others will see as totally unconnected. Nature looks most beautiful when it drizzles or in the early morning sun. i LOVE TO BE ON MY BALCONY WHEN IT DRIZZLES TO SEE ITS IMPACT ON MY TREE-LINED AVENUE.
     
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  9. Srama

    Srama IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear @Balajee ,

    Oh! I 've missed your words :biggrin: Thank you! Honestly not that I plan these snippets ...mind sometimes. Can you see how I cannot talk to anyone about such things and just need to put down somewhere? Grateful to have a platform and friends like you who keep me encouraged. Even as I wrote this, I realized how much I enjoy a drizzle! Rooftop tree viewing is something I miss thoroughly here - but you will always catch me looking skywards :) Thank you for your warm words.
     
  10. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    I ended up getting a subscription to YouTube. I always marveled at how much could be conveyed before the "Skip ad" time became active. I actually miss the ad's sometimes, in particular the "Grammarly" ads.

    Heaps of leaves on the sides of my street have always been a more vibrant indicator of the months of the year going by. The same gardeners have been working on the yards for many years now, so there are few piles, and they have a reassuring uniformity. In the same space, come the year end, we see Christmas trees put out. I have this judgmental neighbor trait in me that I think people who put out the tree as early as the 26th are so callous. : ) But seriously, earlier this evening, I went to buy some milk, and on the way back noticed that some people already have Christmas trees up and window curtains left open. Felt nice to see some festive spirit in these times.

    One of the neatest metaphors for these special people in our lives and memories. Well done. One August long ago, I dared take a solo-trip to India. "Dared" means that left DH in-charge of sending the kids to elementary school on the first day in a world before Whatsapp. I figured that the school didn't entertain requests to change teachers, no school uniform, no jacket needed and school forms are not due that day. So, the most he could mess up was give one kid the other's lunch box, and that would anyway be a good lesson in adapting to the unexpected for the kids. : )

    So, what DH did was very smartly went to Costco at 10 am on a weekday to get school supplies. Even before the teachers gave out lists. He ended up getting a 12 pack of 3" binders, a 12 pack of 2 inch, and another huge one of 1" inch binders. The plain white ones. Long story now short: we still have left overs from those now a decade later. : )

    I have no clue why I wrote all that. Just like binders have evolved to the fancy flexible ones with pockets and what now, the binders among our family and friends have evolved too. There are the binders in the family Whatsapp group, binders in the local social media and in many such unusual places.

    Indeed... a person whose inner world radiates quiet is a draw that is hard to resist. Why would one resist!

    Random observation: in my cousins Whatsapp group we realized that the children of our binder uncles/aunts turned out to be the binders of the next generation.
     
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