Big Fight

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Come on!!! I dont want to take the entire credit:crazy...all of us were concerned and are concerned about Akruti!!! actually thats what I like about IL,....we are genuinely concerned about each other and followup on each other...:cheers

 

You deserve it, Sri.:thumbsup

 

hi akruti after a long time. i gave birth to a baby girl on 22nd jan. well coming to ur problem, i am surprised at the shamelessness of ur sis-in-law's husband, even if ur sil wants ur husband or her sister to pay how come that guy also takes advantage of this? why cant he be a decent person in this matter? and regarding bangles and sarees, u can show those which u got in ur brother's marriage as new to ur mil. who will know abt that. if u want u can tell ur husband also to support u in this. don't listen everything why ur parents has to obey whatever they say. only u r married to their family, ur parents need not stoop right?

 

You deserve it Sri:thumbsup, just like Mstrue mentioned, especially in akruti's case. You had so much patience to explain her and make her understand, her situation.It's a tough job and you have done it well.

Yes, you are right too, that all of us here in IL are concerned about Akruti. We all will take the sisters place.

 

Akruti,

This is the attitude issue every where.See how your are thinking about your SIL ,so obviously your husband also might think say way about your parents.

It's very funny that,I have a one friend and heard from her that ,her MIL used to say that,my son is doing lot of work and my DIL will have some pain all the time and all the blah blah.

When my friend brother got married,and her SIL paretns used to stay in the same town where her brother and wife living.Obviously,they used to go and eat food at the girls parentes as they were newly married.

I heard from my friend that,see she is not right match for my brother and show how he liked her and got married and she is not cooking at home and only my brother doing all the work.

Each and everyone us should change our attitude then only the whole society will change.

 

Be glad that even though she didnt give any gifts...atleast she didnt create another scene or drama....about something or the other! thank god for the blessings that the baby shower went fine without you ending up crying after the party. So be happy for what you got Akruti. really. you got to practise that. and also dont blame your husband when you are doing the same mistakes. its easy to point fingers at him...but you are also not supporting your husband infront of yoru parents and letting them talk what they want to. its your baby and your husband what you do in your house is not your parents business. they can GET what they can afford and rest all whatever you or your hsuband manage is not their headache. thats how its supposed to be. so pls keep that line of respect alive b/w your parents and your husband. (this is what your husband was not able to do and you are upset about it, so dont repeat what he is doing)

good luck and just dont try to involve in all these complexities so much. it just sucks out the happiness out of life. let everyone do what they can and you do what you can and rest of it...leave it and see where it falls into!!! not everything can be planned and arranged!!!

 

I disagree a bit with this. Gifts need to be given out of their own volition. Gifts should not be 'expected'. That is not a gift.

And there is no reason he needs to feel 'proud' because the grandparents gave the kid a gift, and he does not need to 'proudly tell' anyone. I just disagree with that concept.

Gift should not be expected. Then its an obligation, not a gift.

I'd say akruti tell her H exactly that - Gift is upto the parents and let them decide what they want to give. You cannot expect or ask them to gift or gift X etc.

Thats what I'd say she tell her H.

 

It's also absolutely wrong for her MIL to stop her father from visiting her. It is also absolutely wrong that her MIL dictates when and for how long her mother stays with her.

We are not talking about ideals here. We are trying to help a pregnant woman to somehow pacify her crazy and unreasonable MIL without succumbing to her torture and at the same time get what she wants.

 

Hi Akruti,

I have been following your thread. Is there any tradition/custom that husband has to give gold to wife on first delivery? I know few south indian friends who follow this custom.
I second Vidya's post here. Let your dh decide if he wants to convert the necklace to bangles. I hope you know the present rate of gold. It's going to be very expensive for your parents to get gold bangles.
I don't see any wrong in getting/ expecting gifts from parents for grand-children. Let your parents bring what ever in their budget for the baby.
Hey.. you can also show to your daughter when she grows big that her gp gave her the gift.