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Being happy at other’s good Fortune

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Kamalji, Sep 1, 2014.

  1. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Being happy at other’s good Fortune


    Today,in Times of india, Sacred Space I came across this article by Margaret Theophille, which u must read, something really amazing.


    What it says in short is this. We feel sorry, when something bad happens to someone we know.But are we truly happy for that person, when he has prospered, maybe more than u ? How genuine are ur feelings to wards that person, is the crux of this article.


    These are some of the situations that most of us may have faced and expierenced during the course of our life. As an employee, with a company, for many years, a new comer comes, and within a few years rises way above u in every which way.Maybe he used to report to u, serve u tea, and today he is the CEO, and u are reporting to him or her !


    Take the case of Narender Modi. He used to serve Tea in the canteen,to BJP Stalwards like L.K.Advani, Murli Manohar Joshi, and today, they have to report to Modi, who is the Prime Minister, a post they did not hold ever, and now it seems both are not wanted, and have been sidelined. Are they happy with Modi, his rise and his fortune ? Take a Guess !


    A lady working for me as a garment checker, modest salary, had a windfall. They got a good price for the place where they were staying along with other relatives.she got a good share, and now has her own bunglow, some FD’s , rent coming in from one portion of their new home, and her husband now has two taxis, brand new AC ones, and her two sons are doing wonderfully well.


    An office worker of my brother left us recently, we taught him how to drive a car, we paid fro his driving school fees, the licence money etc. He served us as a office boy cum driver for a few years, he was keen to branch out, and he was honest, and we could trust him with anything. He told us a few months in advance, that he wants to leave.


    Today he has financed a tempo, and moves goods here and there, and earn many times more than he was with us.


    Do we grudge both ? The answer is no. Every person has the right to move on, and when they leave with ry blessings, and they touich your feet and tell u, we are available for u whenever u want , how can u ever envy their success. We in fact feel so happy that they aer doing so well in life, that in fact we selfishly say, or imply that we made them, which is not the case at all. They had the willingness to learn, to give us comforts when they worked for us, they gave us more than what we gave them in salary, and they were worth every penny and much more.


    There was this example I read somewhjere no sure where. Say A and B are two employees cum friends in the same organization. A wishes he gets a 5000 raise and he would be happy. Well the boss was kind, and gave 10,000 raise to A. He should be very happy, no ?


    But he was very unhappy, for he came toknow boss gave 20,000 raise to his friend B. Now A could not sleep in peace, and began to harbor a grudge against B.


    Next year A did not get a raise.He should have been unhappy, right ? No he was very happy, for he came to know boss cut 10,000 from the salary of B.


    So happiness is relative I feel. We do not like our neighbor getting a car better than us, or him going for a better holiday destination than us. Do we applaud the boy who came first, while our son came second ?


    I have many exporter friends, who used to at one time, someone used to do my tailoring job, he used to come on scooter, and take away a sack of fabric to be stitched in his stitching unit, someone used to print our fabric, today, they are so big, they emply hundreds of people, they can buy and sell hundreds of Kamalji’s in one shot? Do I hold it against them, that they are today more monied and more successful than me? That I look down on them, and tell the world that this fellow used to years back do this and this for me,etc.or do I acknowledge his present status, and be happy that he has become more successful than me.


    Why cant we understand, that we cannot come first all the time, that others will over take us at some time or the other, that life is not a race, life is a journey. That someone who is working for u, tomorrow he could be way ahead of u, in business money and status.


    My take is this. I feel happy for people who progress in life, and are more successful than me. The reasons are purely selfish. They are happy, means they will not come to me for loans, for the own better cars and homes than me. And if my friends are in dire straits, they will surely come for loans for daughters weddings, medical emergencies , and so many other problems, and I cant say no to them for past relations were such.


    So the more my friends and neightbours are happy and prosperous, the more happy I am, for they will stay away from me , where borrowings are concerned. And I too can utilize their farmhouse comforts , Mercedes benz, when I need to.(for my elder daughters wedding, for the wedding day, we needed an imported car, but we could not find one, and my rich friend was kind enough to give me the car for free, with driver, and flower decoration too .See it helps to have rich friends ) And I can proudly introduce them to my relatives at my daughters wedding, saying” Meet Ashok, he is one of the biggest exporters of Garments of Jaipur. And I will click pictures with him.But what about a friend on bad days, say one who is reduced to driving an Auto, can I introduce him properly to my relatives ? I invited him to the party, that is ok, for we are thick friends, then and now.


    Sorry for so much sermons. You will have to forgive me happily, for today is my brothday, so one day in a year I can afford to annoy u all with my sermons eh ! I cplete 61 today, and I have another 38 to go, to reach 99, my idol Khuswant’s age.


    HAHA

    KAMAL MAHTANI
     
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  2. rgsrinivasan

    rgsrinivasan IL Hall of Fame

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    Great snippet Kamalji. And I am happy to be the first to wish you "Happy Birthday!".
    Have a blast today and a great year ahead! -rgs
     
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  3. kishoreg

    kishoreg Gold IL'ite

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    Good one Kamalji.Many more Happy returns of the day!
     
  4. shyamala1234

    shyamala1234 Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Kamalji,
    First let me wish Happy and Healthy birthday. I wish you all happiness in the coming year.
    I feel happy when subordinates, friends, neighbours and others come up and have good fortune. But if a subordinate gets promotion and if I have to work under him/her I may not be that happy or comfortable. Let me be frank. I would try to avoid that...switching job or transfer to some other division I would try.
    Syamala
     
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  5. iamsrihere

    iamsrihere Platinum IL'ite

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    Happie Happie Birthday Kamalji...

    I have read your snippets many times,and whenever I see that you have posted something ,I come to read it irrespective of whether the topic interests me...And as usual this was humorous yet thought provoking..

    Keep rocking always!!
     
  6. achu1

    achu1 Silver IL'ite

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    Hello Kamalji
    Many many happy returns of the day.

    Nice thoughtful subject you are giving on your birthday.
    It is great if happens as you said. But the thing is, when someone goes to that up position they forget the olds and sometimes behave mean. THAT situation I cant bear.
     
  7. RADIODOC679

    RADIODOC679 Gold IL'ite

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    Happy Birthday kamalji! very different take on being happy at other's happiness for our own good!!!
    Have seen the worst kind of people in my own near family(ashamed to even call them family).Such cheap behaviour-they are all so stinking rich,yet tell false stories that we pawned jewlery etc to buy flat etc..when the truth is they took homeloan or otherwise-why should people lie to us??as if hamre nazar lagane se unka ghar bhasm ho jayega-when the fact is we are so busy in oue lives ,have no time for others'.Can only laugh at their cheapness-& Hope guiness record contacts them for most number of lies spoken in life award(they will win hands down)ha ha ha-
     
  8. chillbreeze

    chillbreeze Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Happy Birthday Kamalji...hope you had a fantastic day. Interesting take on being happy about others' happiness. Your post struck a chord with me. Though I feel happy whenever I hear a good news about friends/family, sometimes it makes me think why nothing is happening in my life. By that I don't mean my life lacks anything, but my life is quite peaceful and routine based (which is a blessing) and I wonder why no excitement happens. Now I am going to adopt your viewpoint and be happy for others always.
     
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  9. GoogleGlass

    GoogleGlass IL Hall of Fame

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    Beautiful one should I say so, No I wouldn't Kamalji.

    Being your birthday let me say that it's a handsome write up as handsome as Kamalji :)

    Happy birthday to you.

    Come on Kamalji, all along I have always been happy and will be happy if something good is going around me. Like the odd one out, the good keeps skipping me. :)

    When would I make my friends happy? When is the good coming my way, to make them happy... :):):)
     
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  10. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Kamalji,

    Many more happy returns of the day and as long as you are able to enjoy life, stay as much as you like. I get to 61 in May 2015, a little younger than you.

    What a nice snippet! Everyone have their own growth path and we are only instruments in some cases and some others are instruments in our lives as well. I played senior executive roles in a software company and was a mentor for many people who are flourishing so well in the industry. I am really very happy to see them doing so well. I have learned the lesson that if I envy someone, it only hampers my own progress. Instead I prefer to enjoy everything I do at each stage that gives a great sense of satisfaction and fulfillment.

    Viswa
     
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