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Balance Of Life

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Vysan, Nov 4, 2007.

  1. Vysan

    Vysan Gold IL'ite

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    I was in my early 30’s. I never seemed to have enough time. I have watched my friends play cricket and travel along with their families. My work took so much of my time. I used to be in the office at 7:30, I left at <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:eek:ffice:smarttags" /><st1:time Hour="8" Minute="30">8:30</st1:time> -<st1:time Hour="9" Minute="0">9:00</st1:time> in the evening. By the time I got home and had dinner, it was <st1:time Hour="10" Minute="30">10:30</st1:time>! And, then I usually had a briefcase full of work. The weekends were full of more work. Just to keep up, I had to put in the hours.

    My wife used to ask me what would happen tomorrow if you got sick. Who would do the work? Sick. Who had time to get sick! "But if I did get sick, someone else would do the work, I suppose."

    I worked night and day and of course on weekends. When I got home I was exhausted but I would push myself and I would read the children a bedtime story. By the time I went to bed, I would be more than exhausted. I had to work hard and harder, so that I can take care of the family. I took more responsibilities and grew in the organization.

    But then I had a change of place and bosses. The CEO of the company I worked for was older and much wiser, I might add! Of course, I continued to work the hours I had been working. One day he came to my desk and told me, 'What I do today is important, because I will never have today again'. You have to complete the work at office timings and leave the office on time. He literally told me that I have to shut the office at <st1:time Hour="18" Minute="0">6:00</st1:time>.

    I sat there stunned. I suddenly thought of what was important to me. While my work was important, I realized my family was more important. I also realized that time for me was important. It was <st1:time Hour="17" Minute="30">5:30</st1:time>, the official closing time of the office. I straightened my desk, felt a twinge of guilt about leaving, but I forced myself to leave. I was home by <st1:time Hour="18" Minute="0">6:00</st1:time>. My children and wife were surprised. I had a wonderful evening.

    I never thought this possible, but I actually accomplished more the next day then I had in weeks. As I was leaving the next day I stopped at my CEO's office and thanked him. He told me to keep balance in work, in family life and in time for myself. He explained to me, while all aspects of our life are important, without a balance, you become addicted and like all addictions you lose -

    - No balance with your family - you lose them

    - No balance with your work - you lose your perspective and you actually lose focus on the important aspects of your job.

    - No balance with yourself - you forget who you are and when you retire you have nothing! Or worse than that, if you lose your job through a company sale or downsizing you lose your identity.

    He went on to tell me that who we are is NOT what we do to make a living. Who we are is a balance of our family, our work, ourselves! It truly was the best advice I ever received.

    "Balance of Life" - important for us ALL!

    Any of you have any ideas / suggestions please let me know…..
     
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  2. subbutr

    subbutr Senior IL'ite

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    Quite true, my dear Vysan,

    Good example and you are Lucky to have such a wonderful Boss.

    Time doesnot wait for any one, We have to make ourselves allot the same according to the priorities.

    subbu
     
  3. Sravanthi28

    Sravanthi28 Silver IL'ite

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    Hi,
    Very well said. Its utmost important to have a balance in life.
    Myself & my husband faced this problem of lacking time to communicate to each other. The main problem is that we both work in different shifts. My office hours are from 9:30 AM to 6 PM & his work starts 9:30 PM to 6:30 AM. Both of us are too career-oriented & always extended ourselves beyond office hours. It was ok since both of us had the same mind set, but suddenly one day we realized that we were just staying in the same house & nothing more exists in -between. Fortunately we could find this gap & now we manage our time well.
    Even my boss is a family man. He too suggests ur indirectly that we should spend ample time with our family. I am greatly inspired by they way he manages his time. Being a Project Manger & handling more than 1 project at a time is not a easy thing. But still he manges well on both the sides. Everybody should know "Time Management" and his/her priorities in life.

    Sravanthi
     
  4. CharuKaur

    CharuKaur Senior IL'ite

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    Hi Vysan

    Firstly congratulations on this beautiful discovery that you achieved.
    Honestly speaking, i have hardly met many men who can really appreciate the importance of spending time with family at home and not (over)working.
    Evryone of us understands that we toil hard only to ensure a safe future for our family only, but the fact remains that the 'present' might be lost in securing the 'future'.
    Besides, i believe, work never stops -people change, projects change, locations change, etc etc... but a person is not as important to his work as to his family :redface:

    I am sure your wife and kids would be happy with your new attitude.
    Kudos my dear friend! Enjoy!

    Guru Nanak has said ' hum aadmi haan ek dumi' - i am human with only one breath in my control.

    Have a nice day!
    Charu..
     
  5. Sriniketan

    Sriniketan IL Hall of Fame

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    Very nice one, Vysan sir.
    You are lucky to have that kind of boss who advised you to keep the balance with your work and home.
    It is true not only in the office atmosphere but it will also suit the home atmosphere where the 'homemakers' work all day!
    If we overwork ourselves with the work at home, we will be tired by the time, children and hubby came from their school and office respectively.
    We might also loose temper unnecessarily on them, by the way to whom can we show our tiredness!
    It is better to balance the work at home too to enjoy and have a balance in life!

    Sriniketan
     
  6. Vysan

    Vysan Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Subbu,

    Yes, I was fortunate that I had some good Bosses and I have leant a lot from them. Thanks for peeping in
     
  7. Vysan

    Vysan Gold IL'ite

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    Hi,

    Thanks for stepping in... Though we all talk of time management and priorities... At times it is easily said than to practice... I have gone through that... Whenever I plan my work and wanted to go off early, on that day, either I would end up attending unexpected meetings or schedules... or worst part, traffic jams... So, I stopped too much planning... Take things one by one, as it comes... This is absolutely me personal experience...

    But I made it a point that I will not stay too late/overnight and all... I have to spend weekends only with the family... This made me to balance my career and family...
     
  8. Vysan

    Vysan Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Charu,

    Thanks....

    I have to thank my wife to make this happens... She without cribbing or shouting about my workaholic addiction... She helped me to overcome this... She made the weekend as a special... She will not have any work for weekends - only cooking... that too the foods which everyone enjoys.... we all sit and have together... Watching movies and all... I enjoyed the moments with my kids... their growing up and their innocent talks and naughtiness... Now, I cannot get the same from them, as they are grown up....

    Sometimes in our plight for careers, we miss out on these pleasures.... That is what I found.... Thanks to some of my Bosses, I managed to enjoy atleast a portion....
     
  9. Vysan

    Vysan Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Srinik,

    Yes, I am lucky to have such a Boss... I still admire him for what he is and I have learnt alot from him... I cannot forget him...

    I agree with you... This is not only for office goers, but also suits for Home Makers...

    On the lighter side of it, I have tasted the sweetness of such tempers....:eek:mg:... (Hope Shan is not peeping in...)... I agree with you, to who else can the tiredness be shown... We are the punch bags...
     
  10. Sriniketan

    Sriniketan IL Hall of Fame

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    Vysan Sir,
    I am sure that Shan will be peeping in one day or the other into this thread.
    What i meant was 'showing our anger' applies to both sides, right?

    sriniketan
     

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