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Baby or PG degree? Which one goes first? Help me!

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous in Parenting' started by Rad, Feb 3, 2007.

  1. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: can u help me?

    I agree with sunitha. there are lot of couples who are now spending money for finding ways to conceive. If your il are supportive and husband is supportive, you can have both. just plan it. discuss it with them.

    we all can give ideas/suggestion. you follow what you feel.
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 16, 2007
    1 person likes this.
  2. dsrini

    dsrini Bronze IL'ite

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    [FONT=&quot]Hi Rad
    Good idea is to proceed with the baby. Because you can study anytime but u will never know when you will get pregnant.
    I will tell my situation, I am in US I switched my visa from H-4 to H-1 (work visa) & got the approval during Oct 2006, and around that time started trying for baby (as we both discussed earlier) and by God's grace I got pregnant in 2 months of trying. I have been trying for a job from Oct but I get opportunities in places that are too far from where I live and my husband doesn't want me to go there with the pregnancy.
    So we have now decided to switch back to H-4 (i.e. dependent visa), so I can't work.
    I felt so sad with this decision only for couple of days but later thought a child God's greatest gift so taking care of my child full time will definitely be great and I don't have any regrets now. Because I know lot of people who have trying for more than 2 years to get pregnant, I praying god that they should all get pregnant sooner.

    My personal suggestion (as a friend) would be go ahead with baby and my wishes for u to get pregnant sooner.

    Last edited: Feb 17, 2007
  3. Lavanya

    Lavanya Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi Rad... like you said its totally your decision in the end irrespective of what people tell you...
    Some points to ponder while making the decision...
    1. both your husband & you should be happy with the decision you make
    2. get few basic tests done to make sure you are in good health now... so if you plan to conceive in 2 yrs & everything goes well you should be able to.
    3. its not a matter of choosing one or the other or one over the other ... so don't feel guilty either way.
    4. if you don't like to take up the responsibility of having a kid then wait for a while ... not necessarily the whole 2 yrs of your PG, you can even conceive in the last semester & by the time you are done with the degree you can have your baby too. But that does not mean that you'll have a stress-free time & also no one can foresee how you'll feel in your last trimester.
    5. you have to see the pros & cons & make a calculated guess. YES its always a gamble just like anything else in life.
    But stick to your decision & be happy - it neither makes you a bad mother/woman nor a loser in career.
    6. Most healthy women conceive without problems until mid 30s. Make sure you set a deadline by when you'd plan to conceive if you plan to pursue your career.

    So think hard for a while & then go about with whatever path you take.... for every choice there's "a path not taken". You cannot regret the rest of your life thinking about the outcome if you had taken it. So make a decision & be happy with it.

  4. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    have the baby first plz coz as u grow older fertility decreases

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