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Attending A Wedding In Which Dowry Was Exchanged

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Rihana, Oct 1, 2018.

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  1. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    Rihana likes this.
  2. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    As usually coming to the rescue of the guy's side even when something as despicable as dowry is involved.
    Not really surprised.

    The use of the w word is very appropriate because when a guy gets married and money is given to his masters ( here the parents) he is literally being sold ( with out actual possession ) . Since he does not perform home jobs and the girl is herself employable....his only job seems to be to provide sex and some spineless sperms.

    When a girl's side looks for a good prosperous guy....they are looking for the comfort of their daughter....not the comfort of her parents.
    The girl lives with the guy sharing his prosperousness and providing care for him and his family . The boys parents do not hand over money and treasures to the girl's family in return for her hand in marriage . So the comparison is not apt.

    A more apt comparison would be of 'bought brides 'as is happening in haryana ,rajasthan and punjab. They have killed a lot of unborn and newly born girls. Now they don't have enough girls to marry their precious sons.
    So they buy brides from poorer states.
    Here actual exchange of money takes place like in the case of the spineless bridegroom here.
    These women are not wives. They are slaves for the family .They are made to work like farm cattle and some times a sex slave for more than the husband. They also produce the precious sons for the family.

    Whore is a better term when there is consent from the spineless boy to the exchange of money and no helplessness involved.
    For women I would use the term slave because it is mostly due to the poverty of her parents and it involves far more back breaking work than providing sex.

    The other apt comparision would be a girl/guy getting a sugar daddy / sugar mommy.
     
    Last edited: Oct 2, 2018
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  3. armummy

    armummy Platinum IL'ite

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    In my state , it is not all one way flow of money. It is hard bargain on both both sides. If you give dowry , there is also expectation that groom side should give atleast half the amount of dowry in jewelry and clothes , most of the main jewelry comes from groom to bride .

    Usually there are witnesses or marriage broker who knows what was exchanged, , a smart lawyer will convert this into stridhan which is legal for courts and can be claimed back.
     
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  4. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    Our informant to the American Reception for the wedding is yet to decide whether to go or not. The critical deal-breaker information on valet parking is not available yet.

    We are too quick to declare the JV a failure, and the dowry funds embezzled already.

    I am rooting for the couple to succeed, have a happy marriage, produce half a dozen healthy children,--- after all if those who can afford dont do that who will...eh?---, and go on to live to a ripe old age.
     
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  5. kcb

    kcb IL Hall of Fame

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    I mean to say, not completely a switch over of mentalities just because they are in US, but we can try to learn few good things from other cultures if we live there for a long period. Why can't we learn not taking dowry or looting people in the name of customs when we can easily learn wearing modern outfits, adopting pub culture, live in relations etc. from western culture???

    I am not favorable to any culture...I am favorable to adopting good things from any culture.
     
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  6. ragnarok

    ragnarok Senior IL'ite

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    @yellowmango - no one is condoning dowry here. Its just the language you are using needs restraint. What next? There are so many EMA and borderline ema threads here? Do we go and call them "justified" abusive terms as we deem fit? We can express our disdain without the use of profanity and abusive terms. Rather we must avoid them since those are the rules else if each of us start to use such abusive terms where "we see fit", that wont be good at all.
     
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  7. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    @ragnarok Rags, you find any part of a post offending or violating forum's written or unwritten guidelines, please use the Report-icon under it. Your intentions are no doubt good but by posting your thoughts in threads instead of using the Report-icon or PM to admins, you only disrupt the thread, create avoidable strife and simply spoil what is otherwise a mostly light thread with some tangential ponder on social issues.

    You can start off itself by using report-icon or PM to admin. Ok, you had to make one post stating what you found objectionable. I, OP of this thread, respond and say those words are fine by me. At least after that, desist from dragging the matter further in thread. Please. Thank you. Love you.
     
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  8. suasin

    suasin Gold IL'ite

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    Wrong post, sorry people ....
     
  9. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    @suasin I happened to read the post. It was not wrong. Was funny and asked the question in a funny way. Sorry to see it go. But not surprised.

    Rags, why do you?
     
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  10. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    @Cheeniya @IL_Admin can you please close this thread? Got many useful inputs. Thank you.
     
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