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Asking For Change When You Don't Contribute Financially

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Dreamer, May 31, 2020.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Honestly...doesn’t sound very good to read it..you have been staying 3 years and “saved rent” if you had stayed elsewhere!and you will still stay for another year or two..

    As a ‘thank you’..I think you should spend for construction expenses even if they don’t ask of it especially when you want to give suggestions.
     
  2. Dreamer

    Dreamer Silver IL'ite

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    I should have mentioned that I stayed on their insistence.
     
  3. Minion

    Minion Gold IL'ite

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    It does not matter you agreed because it was mutually beneficial for you and them, now you want more.
     
    anika987 likes this.
  4. sandhya2020

    sandhya2020 Silver IL'ite

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    deleted
     
    Last edited: Jun 1, 2020
  5. SunPa

    SunPa Platinum IL'ite

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    Let me see if I got this right
    You dont know if it is worth spending money on a change you want in a house, that is not yours, because you will be there only for 2 more years but think it will be worth spending money for your in-laws because you want the changes ?
     
    Dreamer likes this.
  6. Dreamer

    Dreamer Silver IL'ite

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    Thanks for answering. If you read my other reply, I moved in with my in laws because they asked me to because of some issues and since my wife is their only daughter.
     
  7. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    ok, so what's the point of mentioning rent and moving out? If I offended you, sorry, but your presentation was poor. There's nothing wrong in staying with in-laws provided you treat them like family.
     
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  8. Sweety2019

    Sweety2019 Silver IL'ite

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    I hope I don't offended anyone here..IMHO it feels like a double standard on the opinions..
    What if we change the male into female in the same situation here? Would the answers be the same?:thinking:

    Well OP trying to be unbiased here..yes it is not very nice to renovate the house without involving much financially..but just check for other options as to if you can re arrange somethings like furniture s etc for feasibility of both the couples and parents..or can there be something done in a small area that only u use..with their permission ofcourse

    maybe they wouldn't like it if it was completely changed because if you are sure of leaving in the next 2yrs..
    Because to reconstruct anything it technically take close to a year..so you are left with only one year to live with them..so they will have to change a lot for that..

    keeping that in mind if u really want a change..why dont u find a place close to them..then u and ur wife both can do whatever you want with the place..
     
  9. Sweety2019

    Sweety2019 Silver IL'ite

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    I hope I don't offended anyone here..IMHO it feels like a double standard on the opinions..
    What if we change the male into female in the same situation here? Would the answers be the same?:thinking:

    Well OP trying to be unbiased here..yes it is not very nice to renovate the house without involving much financially..but just check for other options as to if you can re arrange somethings like furniture s etc for feasibility of both the couples and parents..or can there be something done in a small area that only u use..with their permission ofcourse

    maybe they wouldn't like it if it was completely changed because if you are sure of leaving in the next 2yrs..
    Because to reconstruct anything it technically take close to a year..so you are left with only one year to live with them..so they will have to change a lot for that..

    keeping that in mind if u really want a change..why dont u find a place close to them..then u and ur wife both can do whatever you want with the place..
     
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  10. Dreamer

    Dreamer Silver IL'ite

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    Thanks for replying. Yes, I am pretty sure the answers would have been different in case of a woman. We plan to move to a new city after about 2 years or else would be okay to stay close to in-laws house.
     
    Vedhavalli likes this.

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