Simon Sinek, the speaker in the third most popular TED video of all time, argues in his classic book Start With Why that the order matters. When aiming to inspire yourself or others to take action, start with the why. Get straight to it. In another video, Sinek gives an example all of us can relate to -- you receive an email from a person who has not been in touch with you for a long time. The email starts off with a bunch of small talk and follows that up with the favor: Dear Lisa - Long time. Hope you are doing well. I read about your moving over to Standard Bank in the Financial Times. Congratulations on all you’ve been doing. It’s really amazing. We should talk or have coffee sometime. I might be in Delhi later this year. I have a favor to ask of you - can you please vote for my photograph in the “What to visit first in NY state” competition? I am trying to win the two thousand dollar prize and a mention in the Royal Photographic Society’s 2019 issue. Say Hi to blah blah blah... Thanks, Amar. The small talk at the beginning already has us wondering, "OK why is this person really emailing me?" And by the time we come to the actual favor, we are more likely to delete the email. What if the order in the email was switched so that the favor is asked right at the beginning before the pleasantries? Dear Lisa - I am hoping you could vote for my photograph in the “What to visit first in NY state” competition. I am trying to win the two thousand dollar prize and a mention in the Royal Photographic Society’s 2019 issue. It’s been a long time since we spoke. Hope you are doing well. Congratulations on the move to Standard Bank and the article in the Financial Times. Might be in Delhi later this year, we should catch up. Thanks, Amar. Totally different. The small talk at the end of the email sounds more sincere if it follows the actual favor request. The reader leaves the email more likely to click and vote for the photograph. What do you think? Thanks to an erstwhile yet among us member here for the catchy title of this thread, and thanks to this article where I first read about Simon Sinek.
Totally agree with the second email. I feel, if we do the exchange of pleseanteries in the beginning, something like - it’s been long we spoke - it more looks like blaming the other person also for not keeping in touch. So, better ask wat you actually want from the person first and then a casual catchup.
Yes. Leaving the small talk to the end makes it (not only sound, but really) more sincere. Not beating about the bush, and getting straight to the point works well when asking for money in a phone call.... to mom and/or dad. Parents with children in college would know this by experience. When the child finishes the biz'ness of the money need, and then inquires about the whatever else, the parent is also more likely to believe that the reasons she heard for the money-needs were (also) genuine.
Didn't think of it like that! That comment could indeed be taken as casting partial blame on the reader! I read that article some time ago. After that I happened to send out some such emails to friends and ex-colleagues. I did start off with the actual request, but it felt a bit odd. Because the "need a favor" emails that I receive have at least one line at the beginning: "Hope you are doing well." I asked two very young people -- college kids -- and they said even in a short text message, getting directly to the point would seem awkward. My favorite form is in fact when the email contains only the request. Not having to scroll down on cell phone is great.
I was thinking -- presented with two formats like in the first post, one will choose the second one with pleasantries at the end. But, if we receive only one email and it starts off with the request, wouldn't we feel the email was too business-like? In a phone call, yes, getting straight to the point is better. Also, the asker is able to continue the conversation depending on what the (would-be) giver : ) says. In an email, the asker has to anticipate the reader's reactions ahead of time. It would be very funny if my child inquired about any whatever else. : ) I guess it might happen when been an adult for a while.
