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Arrogant Teacher??

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous in Parenting' started by nayidulhan, Nov 21, 2016.

  1. Nov 21, 2016 #1
    nayidulhan

    nayidulhan Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Friends,
    My daughter goes for a class where the teacher has an arrogant disposition. She will reprimand when any child goes wrong and give snappy answers when asked any question. She is very knowledgeable, in her mid thirties and a spinster (so obviously no kids of her own). She is respected well in the society for her work. She teaches well too... I think. My child has started this class only 1&1/2 to 2 months ago.
    Most other teachers are very polite and lovey dovey with the kids, only this lady is like this. My daughter sometimes feels hurt when the teacher rebukes her for something.

    When I happened to talk about this class to other parents, I realized that all the parents are aware of the teacher's nature but are continuing because (1) she's very good at her work and (2) they think the kids need to face unpleasant people/ situations in real life later anyway. So this class & this teacher will introduce them to it. They feel it's good that someone is strict in an otherwise cushiony-lovey-dovey environment. The teacher is rude to parents as well. So I am not sure if she's actually arrogant or that's just her style of speaking to others.

    What do you think?
     
    nayidulhan, Nov 21, 2016
    nayidulhan, Nov 21, 2016
    #1
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  2. Nov 21, 2016 #2
    nayidulhan

    nayidulhan Silver IL'ite

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    I should have added this in my first post!

    The teacher is the best in her field... no doubts about it. So I will have to continue my child's tutoring with her. What exactly I want help with is- how to help my child cope up with impoliteness, arrogance and rudeness (she feels hurt by the teacher's words) without her learning these negative things in the process (without her learning to be arrogant)? What should I tell her?

    She knows that my family does not encourage/ appreciate arrogance at all. So I don''t want her to think that Mom makes exceptions when the person is knowledgeable/ capable in their field.
     
    nayidulhan, Nov 21, 2016
    nayidulhan, Nov 21, 2016
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  3. Nov 21, 2016 #3
    guesshoo

    guesshoo IL Hall of Fame

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    It depends on how old your child is. I'm not sure what my answer would be for an older child, but if the child is below 7 - and this is my personal opinion - I'd change the teacher. an intimidating teacher, however knowledgeable, doesn't do much for a child's confidence. Anything else the child can learn later.

    You do seem to imply that she doesn't encourage discussion. She additionally "rebukes" kids which only makes the child scared of making mistakes - instead of learning that it's normal to make mistakes and how to correct them. Such a teacher a child can do without. My child is 5 and I pulled her out from a very rude teacher and complained to management. Other parents had complained too, I suppose and he was quickly removed.

    If the child *has* to go to the teacher and no one else and is over 7, a lot of discussions might help. Under 7, I'd shield my child from anyone who doesn't model good behaviour.
     
    guesshoo, Nov 21, 2016
    guesshoo, Nov 21, 2016
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    sindmani, idonthatemylife, nayidulhan and 1 other person like this.
  4. Nov 21, 2016 #4
    nayidulhan

    nayidulhan Silver IL'ite

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    Thanks guesshoo for the perspective. You are correct. My daughter is 6 years old... at an impressionable age.

    I think I will see how things move from here. I may talk to the teacher next time. If things don't change then I will discontinue.

    The only thing that intrigues me is why she has so many students of all age group and why parents continue to flock there. :neutral:
     
    nayidulhan, Nov 21, 2016
    nayidulhan, Nov 21, 2016
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  5. Nov 21, 2016 #5
    coolgal123

    coolgal123 Platinum IL'ite

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    I second @guesshoo, for small children, too much of rudeness will not bring any good, they are sensitive at this age and comprehend things differently than adults.....small child can do with less studies but they should be in good positive environment which forms their personality well...
    IMO i can put up with the teacher who is less good in teaching but not with the one who is rude to small children.
     
    coolgal123, Nov 21, 2016
    coolgal123, Nov 21, 2016
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  6. Nov 21, 2016 #6
    guesshoo

    guesshoo IL Hall of Fame

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    If this is in India, it's merely because of culture. People don't care about willy-nilly stuff like confidence when there are marks to score / competitions to win. mental health of kids is sadly disregarded.

    I'm not sure talking to the teacher will help... Surely you can find an encouraging teacher? Well over 30 years ago I had a teacher like that and my mum had a word with her. Guess what? She made my life hell. I would have been 5 or 6 and i remember the nasty shouts and the beatings she'd give me on my palm with a stick. Thankfully it wasn't school but was an extracurricular and I refused to go any more.

    Some people should not be allowed to teach kids. Sadly India doesn't have that filter.
     
    guesshoo, Nov 21, 2016
    guesshoo, Nov 21, 2016
    #6
    blindpup10 likes this.

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