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Are We Completely Blameless?

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by satchitananda, Sep 2, 2015.

  1. rajakumaruma

    rajakumaruma Senior IL'ite

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    i feel that the relationship with in-laws is a slightly more formal one and should be handled with respect from both the party.In all cases the first impression is the best impression. Both parties-ils and dils should not hurt each other through words in the initial days of marriage. Make a dil feel comfortable and welcome ,she will surely treat you like a queen afterwards.
    thanks and regards
    uma
     
    2 people like this.
  2. satchitananda

    satchitananda Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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  3. Priyankitha

    Priyankitha New IL'ite

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    Hi mita,
    It is really inspiring to me. your words are just like magical balls.. I will try be like you because every second, every minute , every day I feel like why I fell into this home of hell. Every second I cry loudly when am alone.. I feel much better after. But still dis is not d life I expected. Still life is ups n downs. So I am pleasure to accept them. My mind tells me dat it takes time to get adjust with narrow mind people ,2 way behaviour people. Even me also got the same name baby river( "pilla kaaluva" - "mellaga paare yeru" in Telugu ) by relatives n family friends. My family teases me with shabari name n friends teases me with ayomayam name. ;)
     
  4. Aaalll

    Aaalll Junior IL'ite

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    My life and expectations were different

    When I got married the very next day I told my husband how I wanted to be part of the family . And his reply was forget it no ones going to ask you anything or involve you . Whatever they want or need to discuss they will ask him only!!

    Bammm... My dreams shattered and I cried literally!! Imagine even they didn't think I am worth discussing if we should attend some1s wedding or have a party at home. Nothing at all

    I built a wall around me now!
     
  5. satchitananda

    satchitananda Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Aalll, you tried to be part of the family but they were not fortunate enough to enjoy the addition to the family. So don't worry, the loss is their's.
     
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  6. Priyankitha

    Priyankitha New IL'ite

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    Hi suhasini,

    My problem with my mil is same as that of urs.. :( dont know what to do.. Still today facing the same no change but increasing sarcastic nature n mental torture with her indirect actions n words upon me..
     
  7. soulful

    soulful Platinum IL'ite

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    I have wondered about this too.... Now I try to practice detachment and my main advice in the Inlaws forum is detachment... But it is not always easy. As long as I am far away from her, I am ok...But sometime the monkey mind takes me to the past and I start fuming all over again. Guess it just goes to prove I am not a saint.

    When she says something nice, I find it suspicious. My mind goes on a archaeological excavation trip trying to find similar instances and her action in those instances and then decides "this is all B$"

    I am still unable to figure out if my mind is doing this to protect me from hurt and disappointment or is it ego that is preventing from trusting her.
     
    1 person likes this.
  8. satchitananda

    satchitananda Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    I can totally relate with that soulful. I am sailing in the same boat.
     
  9. Hopefully

    Hopefully Gold IL'ite

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    God exists or not- im not sure
    Does heaven and hell really exists - not sure
    Did man come from monkeys - not sure
    Will India become a great Nation - not sure
    I can add on 100 more things

    One thing I'm for sure
    My MIL can never do anything good for me....id it looks so it means she will be getting some triple or even more benefit out of it.
    I will live my own life only after this lady is no more...until she is there she makes sure that my husband is a puppet in her and her daughters hands
     
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2015
  10. satchitananda

    satchitananda Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Sorry to hear that you feel the situation is so hopeless. Can only pray that things change for the better. Till then, hang in there.
     

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