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Are We All Hypocrite?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by RichAmlan, May 17, 2018.

  1. RichAmlan

    RichAmlan New IL'ite

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    Consider two cases
    1. Your partner is no longer attracted to you because you become physically less attractive or you become busy with your job and so are not giving time to your partner.so your partner decide to leave you or indulge in affair with another person
    2. You are no longer attracted to your partner because of same reason that mentioned above and then leave or have affair with another person.
    Will we give same judgement for both cases?or will be biased? Personally i will be heartbrocken and will not be able to accept if my husband want to leave me for these reasons.i also think i will never leave my husband for those reason.but still i think i want my husband to be perfect but expect him to accept me with my faults.sometimes i shouts at him and expect him to accept all my mood swings and madness but when he shouts at me for first time some days ago I became very mad and cried.i found it a bit hypocritical from my side and after watching other people I think everyone is biased in their judgement.
    So what do you think ladies?are we all selfish and hypocrite atleast a little bit.
     
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  2. iamsrihere

    iamsrihere Platinum IL'ite

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    True love will accept a person for who he/she is. Everyone of us have these episodes of anger shouting and arguments. But that doesn't define our character. At the same time, if only negative emotions are what you can express to your spouse taking him/her for granted, it is unfair to expect him/her to stick to this because they are afterall humans with emotions and need for love.

    So i feel if you go overboard in any of your emotions it will not help in the long run.
     
    nakshatra1, shravs3 and wish4miracle like this.
  3. anitalovesyou

    anitalovesyou Silver IL'ite

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    More than selfish or hypocrites, we are humans ! All of us are grays, no black or white !!
     
    rachaputi likes this.
  4. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

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    The fact that you found your behaviour to be hypocritical is in itself a good first step of self realisation. Only when you recognise the problem, you can find a solution. Now, you can figure out a way for a fair relationship that doesn't question your own behaviour.

    Are we selfish? Are we hypocrites? Yes n No!
    It depends on the situation. Just like all the topics, it stands divided too. As not all are like that.

    Personally, I have learnt to not do something if I don't want someone else to do it to me.

    So if am not perfect n want my hubby to accept my flaws .. I expect myself to accept his flaws too.

    If I expect him to listen when I yell. Then I should listen when he yells too.

    I don't have to like / love it but I shouldn't resist it.

    Not sure whether it's a 'fair code' or a 'moral code'. But 'I' have 'chosen' to live like that.
    N it truly helps to live peacefully n have a clear, guilt-free mind than some friends (men n women) who are ok for them to have affairs, but their spouses can't. And that's being selfish n hypocrites.

    But again, not all are like that!
     
    Last edited: May 17, 2018
  5. silentlistener

    silentlistener Silver IL'ite

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    I disagree with you. What you mentioned above both , are not the reasons for affairs.

    With men even with very very beautiful and attractive wives too they start affair with some other woman based on Novelty and Variety. When caught by the wifeall they say is," look , I love you. I never found you less attractive but the Novelty with the other girl made me have an affair with her. The reason why I had affair with her has nothing to do with you".

    With woman even with very handsome and successful husbands, who look very attractive, the woman develops affair with a less attractive second man, simply because the emotional attention paid by the second man is more abundant than her husband.

    So, the reasons for men is Novelty and variety and the reasons for affair for women is emotional attention.

    It has nothing to do with attractiveness.
     

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