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Approached by the other parent......

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by saraswathi21st, Dec 17, 2009.

  1. saraswathi21st

    saraswathi21st New IL'ite

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    :hiya


    A new family moved into our neighborhood and they are pakistanis. Their child and my child are in the same grade and this lady said that she wants to send her kid to play with my kid. I really don't want my kid to mingle with people from that country especially. My kid has friends and plays with people from a variety of countries. But this is something I do not want my kid to do.
    My child seriously has no opinion.....not that she is willing to play or very close with the other child. She is only 10yrs old. How do I say no to the approach by that mom.

    Please tell me would you be comfortable if your child mingled with pakistanis or is it just me??


    Saraswathi
     
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  2. Pavarun

    Pavarun Silver IL'ite

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    Saraswathi,

    I think you should shed your reservations and be open-minded. While it is true that our countries have been to war with each other the average Pakistani seems very much like the average Indian to me. For the record, we have had very good relationship with our nextdoor neighbor, a second-generation couple of Pakistani origin. Our kids were also of the same age, we have had a lot of playdates and have been to each others functions. They actually have moved out, and we miss them, my son especially. At work also I have several co-workers from Pakistan, Bangladesh and they all seem very friendly and nice to me, not to mention share many of the same cultural traits like family, festivals, functions etc.
     
  3. Vrindavipul

    Vrindavipul Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear,

    Be open-minded. They are like us only. I think thers is no need to worry. But be attentive.
     
  4. vimala1957

    vimala1957 Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi Saraswati,
    It is our duty to see that our children make good friends and get good environment so that they become good human beings. Just restricting to make a friend who is from a particular country would sow the seed of probably hatred in the mind of the child towards the people of that country, because you allow him to have friends from all other countries.
    We must remember that the division and hatred is not between the people of India and pakistan but it is the politicians who create and promote these feelings of hatred for their mal intensions and draw the attention of the common man away from other major and serious problems.
    I think you must inculcate the feeling of love towards all human beings in our children. Then as they grow up and develop their own reasoning and thinking, they can decide on which person can be a friend and which not.
    I would suggest that you must have an open mind as the other parent and decide.

    Good luck and wish your child the best in life.

    Vimala
     
  5. tikka

    tikka Gold IL'ite

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    Has this couple really shown any reason for you to think they are against Indians. I do appreciate the lady trying to make an effort to reach out to a neighbour and make friends with her.
    For the record, I don't like Srilanka's use of force against Tamilians or the Australian treatment of aborigines or the American treatment of half the world. It should not mean I hold every citizen of each of this country responsible for the carnage/propaganda their countries maybe up to. How would I even know what they feel about what their country is doing if I do not make an attempt to get to know them. Your neighbours may be probably being equally disappointed with what their Governments are up to, you know. And they should not have to denounce their own country to be friends with what seems like a nice girl/nice neighbours....
    For that matter, I really do not like India's policies in the North East. I really do wish I can stop talking to that certain kind of Indian who thinks their country/their leaders can never be beyond the pale ;-) And go live in a country where there is no boundary issue, where immigrants are equally respected, which does not hold alien territory by force. But that would be utopia.
     

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