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Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by akruti9, Sep 23, 2010.

  1. SriVidya75

    SriVidya75 Platinum IL'ite

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    Nisha

    thats a good point....Akruti...Nisha has mentioned valid points...isnt it risky to travel during your pregnancy? why cant your parents wiat till you deliver the baby? why such hurry to get things done all at once..is this the reason why you kept talking about taking permission??? no wonder your MIL or husband will say NO...even I would say NO to travelling during 7th month..
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2010
  2. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    Consult your doctor. The doctor is the qualified professional to advise whether International travel can be done or not.
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2010
  3. nishatw

    nishatw Senior IL'ite

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    And srividya, note the point that she already had a miscarriage once. Still i don't know why she doesnt ask suggestions abt taking care for the baby rather than asking suggestions how to fight with her mother-in-law and husband. I think she's paranoid and zaroor daal mein kuch kaala hai!
     
  4. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    Folks - the best thing is to consult the doctor who has access to medical and patient condition, instead of each one pronouncing whether travel is ok or not. Let the professionals examine the situation of the patient.
     
  5. nishatw

    nishatw Senior IL'ite

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    spiderwoman, she herself is not suggesting anything, i have never seen anybody bothered more about others rather than their own pregnancy. i am also carrying and in the last stage of 6th month
     
  6. sng

    sng Senior IL'ite

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    akruti9,

    It depends on how are you doing...if everything is fine health wise, you can go then...I remem in my case my MIL wanted me to visit there home in india when I was 6 months pregnant...she said 6 months is the safest period....also my co sis is also going to his bro marriage...at that time she'll be 6 months pregnant...and my MIL is not saying anything to her.....becz miscarriage risk is only till 5th month...after that in 6th month, in worst case it would be premature delivery..I think so...consult with doc first.

    Do not ask for their(mil+fil) permission...Do whatever is good for u..They'll never be happy and never will convince so just tell them for sure u r going and book ur ticket..You are working...so I guess u can use ur finances

    Take small small flights...I guess it would be good for u...rather than long flight....It would be nice if u convince ur folks to have marriage after few months back like in summer..then u would have also enjoyed..
     
  7. vasudhas

    vasudhas New IL'ite

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    Re: New problem.

    wow srividya, can u give me this lecture everyday. It just does not come in thick skull:bonk:bonk, TO STOP IGNORING THEM AND THEIR PROBLEMS. Even now after reading your 1st post on this thread, I called my DH and asked him if he is upset with me( In the morning M.I.l had badmouthed about me) Obviously he got pissed and said- "can I do my work. Its diwali eve, stuck in traffic and u have to bring this issue now" I get scared of my m.i.l and in agitation and frustration, do something or say something, which I regret whole day. It hurts my head and I m not able to conceive for long time cos of this. I have definitely gone MAD. I am really scared of my M.I.L as she is very manipulative, shrewd and control freak. She has every one under her control and my life is totally screwed coz I get scared of her, the way she looks at me, shouts, taunts at me.
     
  8. ars

    ars Platinum IL'ite

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    Akruti,
    Consult your doctor and do what the doctor tells. Let your parents know before they fix the wedding date you are going by doctor's advice.
    Why can't your parents have a summer wedding after the baby is born?
    I have heard that the air pressure while travelling can cause premature delivery later. You don't want that do you.
    Taking care of preterm baby will be more stressful than dealing with your IL's. Also, you have to think of preterm babies future health issues.
    So think and act in your and baby's intrest. Bro, parents IL are all secondary right now.
    Good luck.
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2010
  9. Rakhii

    Rakhii Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    @ Akruti, I have been reading your threads. If I am not mistaken you already had a miscarriage. I don't know how true it is but after the first miscarriage, usually people say that you have to be very careful for the second time.
    Apart from the regular stress, this wedding stress and travel might not be too good for the baby. You will be traveling some 40,000 ft up in the air. Are you sure your baby will not be affected because of the air-pressure? You will not be able to forgive yourself if something happens in these last stages. Its better to be paranoid and be prepared than be sorry later.

    I know how important it is to be present at a siblings wedding. Is it possible for the wedding to be postponed until after the baby is born? If not, your prayers and best wishes will always be there for your brother no matter where you are. So, think about this twice before you make up your mind about traveling in 7th month, not once but twice.

    Edit: Spiderman, yes, professional advice is better than all of our advices put together but still, traveling in 7th month, if it can be avoided, is good right?
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2010
  10. akruti9

    akruti9 Senior IL'ite

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    Hi All thanks for your advices. I just started my 5th month I am in my 17th week and planning to tarvel in 6th month. and coming back in 6th month. I know it is not good to travel in last trimester. Last time I had miscarriage because I had thyroid issues and I did not know that. NOw I am on medication for Thyroid . Last time pregnancy was spotting from day one this time it is touch wood but no complications at all. I already asked my doctor and she said it is completely safe to do international travel in second trimester. Regarding health issues and doctors'a dvice and my office vacation considering all these I am good to travel. Only concern is my Inlaws....... My parents are looking for my brother's marige since 3 years and now it got fixed .Alreday he crossed 30 and my parents are afraid if this relation goes then it might take some more time. even in summer my baby will be only 3 months I don't think that is safe to tarvel with infant to India even a one yeard old gets sick and have problems in flight then how come a 3 month old. so considering that my brother has to wait more than a year which is not fair.
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2010

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