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analytical points on building a good relationship in marriage

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by padmaiyangar, Oct 15, 2007.

  1. padmaiyangar

    padmaiyangar Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear members,
    here are some important points to build up good relationship in marriage
    these are collected from books and web sites. I hope it will give some
    thought to think.
    Intimacy :close, warm, communicative experience self-disclosure, sense of belonging
    Friendship :based on mutual interests and values women’s friendships are more intimate men’s friendships are less intimate
    Passion :intense, physiological desire for another person Intimacy self- disclosure leading to connection, warmth, trust
    Commitment : staying with a person through thick and thin
    Patterns of Loving
    No love :absence of all three components
    Liking :intimacy, but no commitment or passion
    Infatuation :passion, but no commitment or intimacy
    Empty Love :commitment, but no intimacy or passion
    Romantic Love :intimacy and passion, but no commitment
    Fatuous Love :commitment and passion, but no intimacy
    Companionate Love :commitment and love, but no passion
    Consummate Love :commitment, intimacy, and passion
    Patterns change as the partners change
    Typical patterns: passion peaks early, declines, then stabilizes intimacy & commitment increase if relationship is satisfying
    Cross-cultural similarities
    Men prefer physically attractive women
    Women prefer industrious & ambitious men
    Social evolution theory explains this as part of our evolutionary history
    Social construction theory explains this as a result of socialization into gender stereotypes
    Non marital Lifestyles
    Single :Numbers increasing:postpone or avoid marriage
    More acceptance, less social pressure to marry Most are active, secure, fulfilled
    Meets fundamental needs for belonging, sex, emotional growth, happiness….
    Best way for raising children
    Positively correlated with better physical, mental and financial well-being
    Differing expectations for marriage
    women expect sharing feelings and confidences
    men expect sharing activities, especially sex
    Divorce rate highest in early adulthood
    Half of marriages end in divorce
    Characterized by high levels of conflict
    Communication problems is #1 reason
    Family Life
    Becoming parents
    Desire for children is almost universal

  2. puni88

    puni88 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Good information.

    Thanks for sharing,

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