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Am I Doing Something Wrong ?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by EagerForInfo, Aug 15, 2021.

  1. chanchitra

    chanchitra Platinum IL'ite

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    yes. thats what i have been saying
     
  2. indubalram

    indubalram IL Hall of Fame

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    It’s so scary । that she has to go through this!
     
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  3. chanchitra

    chanchitra Platinum IL'ite

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    True. It happens.
    Even moms with special needs kids go through this. Imagine their plight.
     
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  4. EagerForInfo

    EagerForInfo Gold IL'ite

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    He would avoid buying food or diapers at all cost when I was home with the baby. He just started but buying food in 2020 during lockdown when friends were discussing corona and how to buy food in advance to avoid going out. Maybe because friends would ask but I don’t know. Covid was a turning point with regards to food shopping
     
  5. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    Thats a positive change. Keep your past experience in your mind. Dont bring it again and again as it may elevate to more issues. If there is anything positive, encourage, appreciate and take steps from yourside to reduce negatively in your marriage. As you want this marriage now, make the stay, pleasant for you. Good luck
     
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  6. EagerForInfo

    EagerForInfo Gold IL'ite

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    But why ???? When he knows friends are watching he buys. So he knows he’s is wrong in not buying food. But why???? It’s emotional turmoil when ur baffled by his weird behavior !!
     
  7. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Are you serious or sarcastic? She is giving more than half of her salary to him. Is she worth something to him? If so, he would take care of her and not negotiate like a business partner with her. What is this world coming to? First, society said women should not work, next she can work, next she should work but take care of the house, now give the husband's "worth" to him. For what? The guy has his own salary. He is not doing philanthropy by marrying her. @EagerForInfo, you have every right to hold on to your savings. He is being an asshole if he is asking for your entire salary. Unfortunately, this is how men are, they support each other. You are his wife, not a slave to give your *entire* paycheck. Don't yell. Put your foot down and tell him firmly that you need your savings. I would say you volunteer for the shopping if necessary. Family is teamwork, not power play. It is not at all a virtue to give away your earnings and behave like a Saint. From personal experience, it has only backfired, did not help any woman.
     
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2022
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  8. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Cut that "friend" off from your life. If you're in trouble tomorrow will she offer you boarding and lodging expenses? You should stop confiding in people like her. Looks like you are surrounded by pigs.
     
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  9. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    @EagerForInfo, a general advice and my 2 cents. Even the strongest and closest, most loving relationships are broken by money. So don't let money dictate your relationship. That said, nowadays being a self sacrificing woman and confiding, giving away your everything to your man is not considered a virtue, by the man himself. A snake should not bite but it should not stop hissing. Please play your cards wisely. And don't look up to men and definitely not women in your circle for help and support. It never works.
     
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  10. chanchitra

    chanchitra Platinum IL'ite

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    Well said. I learnt this the hard way
     

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