Advice please!

Heyyy......if you believe he loves you means he loves you ..no second thought

Even i got engaged in jan (2009)and got married in june(2009)..In between he was in US and he never gave me any gift and me too never thought abt it ....for me too it was arranged marriage..

But you know..he loves me so much (of course me too )and taking care of me so nicely that for me gift and all are very very less prio in life..

i would really suggest, please dont let such things bother you..

Many many congratulation..Wish both of you very very happy married life.

Thanks,
Kalp

 

People have to understand Indian Arranged Marriage guys are quite a bit clueless on these things - get the Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus book and give that as a gift to him. Really, we need tuition.


(I havent read that book fully yet :hide: - Just when can I get out from under this darn chair!?)

 

next thread option "spidey in need of tuition"

indian men in general are not so expressive about their feelings, they even find it difficult to hold their wifey's hand in publicm so presenting a gift is far off tale.. We ladies need to constantly remind them about occasions, need for a gift, while out on a shopping spree then looking at a window of a diamond showroom etc.. but there are certain creatures who will think of the upcoming expenditure rather than taking the hint........" MEN really need tuitions and the tutor needs to be their GIRL"

 

I do need to clarify - Not all Indian men. There are some who are very romantic (some traces in me too ) . So, this is not all Indian men need tuition to romance. No generalization.

CatchJanani - perhaps he is also busy wrapping up things at work for the upcoming wedding. Just a possibility.

 

Tie him to a chair and make him see all romantic movies...may be he will get it then

On a serious note...You send him a gift first ..only then he ll start to think about it!!

 

Janani,

Good decision from you. Once you send the gift, update us how he felt...Hope you get back return gift very soon

 

Simple...Still the relationship doesn't reach that level. So hang on!
Also do not expect "I miss you" & "I love you" statements too often. Guys don't do that.

Congratulations Janani!!! Get ready for your wedding :thumbsup

 

Janani,

My personal experience, I wanted these small gifts as an assurance that we're on track, never got them, same advice people gave me that boys are boys they cant imagine things... you need to make efforts to change etc etc. I kept waiting for a year even after marriage, then I realised that there were many ladies who got trinklets before and after and very often.... however none to me.

Frndz suggested ok buy on his behalf or take him to store to buy for you, He did that forcibly and happily and we were doing v well, then hurricane struck and my beautiful castel came tumbling.

Pls remember crying baby gets attention.. hence learn to cry for basic needs in limited cries.. also dont fall too much in love just because you've got engaged... keep your eyes open to what you want from a marriage and if you're getting it, if not then polietly tell the fellow that you do need small inexpensive trinklets as a sign of his involvement and its important to you.
People who get goodies get it from day1 those who dont they keep making constant efforts till it comes to a point of begging and learn to live life as is.

My opinion- Don't send him gift first, it shows your over-involvement and you running after him, also it shall set you in expectation loop (since you decided to give him a gift in expectation of a return and not much ahead of this thought) and if you dont get it then more disappointment. All the best.