Advice Needed For 6 Year Son

DGcreative · Mar 14, 2017

Dear All

I am seeking advice for my now 6 Year son. He is in 1st grade & generally a very active & fun loving kid.
His school is in Afternoon session, so he doesn't sleep in noon. Even at nights he doesn't sleep till very late & mornings are usually a rush rush.

We were staying with MIL at In-laws house till a year back, but moved in our house in last March.
DS was always staying in creshe & so the routine hasn't changed much for him. The new home is closeby to In-laws house & we visit frequently during weekends sometimes & all festivals.

Lately I have noticed that DS becomes irritated & angry much often if something is not done according to what he wants to do. He throws tantrums, crying out loudly & it creates a scene. We both patiently try to deal with it, but these days his irritation & anger has increased. Also noted that the day he does a lot of playing, mostly when any social meetups with family/friends, he tends to cry out at nights, babbling things from the days happenings.

Recently there were few incidences which confirm my belief that he is becoming over agressive. My SIL was visiting with her kids & DS had holiday at school so he stayed at In-laws house with SIL, MIL & kids. That night almost for an hour he cried hysterically babbling of what all happened in the day. He is the youngest kid among all & is always favored & pampered.

Again yesterday we were at In-laws for Holi & entire day he was playing Holi with friends. Last night he cried irritably & shouting inaudible things, but it was mostly regarding his small fights during the day.

I am feeling really worried about his behavior because it might sound pretty normal to many, but I cant possibly explain the gravity of his night shouting & crying may be. This morning we spoke to him very normally & asked whether he remembers why he was shouting & he doesn't remember anything.

Ladies please suggest me whether could there be something really bothering him or is it just a growing up bout.

guesshoo · Mar 14, 2017

How many hours of undisturbed sleep does he get every night? At 6, he probably needs around 10-11 hours uninterrupted at least.

Does he have a calming routine before bed? It would help if you can lie down next to him after lights are off and let him speak to you. It cold be about his day; it could be about saving the polar bears; it could be about his plan for the weekend. Just let him talk for 10 minutes every night. You might gain a huge insight into what he's thinking.

If beyond that he doesn't calm down and continues having these night terrors, do talk to a doctor and see if he needs to go to a sleep clinic.

connecttousha · Mar 18, 2017

Hi,
Even I am a mother of a 6 year old kid who just moved to Class 1 and pretty much same routine as yours. Though I stay alone (Single parenting as my husband stays in a different location for career demands) with neither parents or In laws staying with me, I try to build a strong bond with my son. My son stays the wholeday in school and daycare. The only quality time we get is almost 2hrs in evening, and I use all the time, I speakout whatever happened in office and probe him to tell his days activities. This has grown over years and now my son non-stop tells me every minute detail about his daycare, school, friends, his games, imaginitaive things..so I pretty much know his thought process and give him corrections wherever required in his behaviours..like Did you say Thanks when X helped you or like..you should not have done this, next time try to do it this way..inculcating some moral lessons here and there. Even in the bedtime stories, I try to make up small stories relating to his friends, myself and all his surroundings, so he gets the confidence that I am an integral part of his world. Its very important for parents to get involved in the kids world, so they can trust and confide in us. I think he needs some time with you to really break and tell what is troubling him. Maybe take a day or two off and do funny things with him, whatever he likes, so he can feel easy and comfortable. Simply spends lots of time with him....
Good Luck