A Mother First

Vidya was widowed at a very young age and brought up her son by herself. She did have help and support from both the families but it was t her credit that her son grew up to be a clever well educated and well employed boy.
It came as a surprise to everyone when he one day walked in with his bride. Vidya had gone to the airport to receive her son who was returning from abroad for a 2 week holiday and she was shocked to see him walking towards her with his arm entwined in the hands of the prettiest girl she had ever seen.
Soon it became the talk of the families and neighbors much to Vidya’s chagrin and everyone denounced her new daughter inlaw even before anyone got to know her. Vidya however paid no attention to all this talk and focused on getting to know her daughter-in-law better.
It became quite clear to Vidya that her son Biju’s wife, Shalini , belonged to the new generation. Very independent, quite spoilt and expected more of others than of herself. Shalini’s parents came for a few days stay and Vidya could see the strong resemblance between Shalini and her mother. Not just the facial features but mannerisms too. Vidya for her part kept quiet and was courteous and loving to all.
Over the course of the next two years, Vidya heard more and more horror tales of Shalini’s behaviour. More from her friends who were also Biju’s friends but also from her son too. Not that Shalini did anything outrageous. It was what she did not do became the topic of conversation.
She did not want to do any household chores or any cooking at all. She wanted to spend more money on shopping and had a bent of mind to accumulate fancy clothing, jewellery and anything else that caught her eye.It appeared to Vidya that her son did not how to handle his wife. Before long Shalini was pregnant.
Vidya got a surprise phone call from Shalini’s parents. Over the phone her father lamented to Vidya of his daughter careless actions and irresponsible behaviour. He wanted Vidya’s advice.
Vidya knew what to do and gave her suggestion. Vidya , Biju and Shalini’s parents became conspirators in an effort to turn Shalini around. According to plan, Vidya planned a 2 month trip to her son’s house. From the moment she landed she took over her son’s finances. A very shocked Shalini made a frantic call to her parents to complain about what she thought was outrageous.
Her parents much to her greater shock took the side of Vidya and acted as if it was perfectly normal. There started the series of events to make life difficult for Shalini. She could not get up whenever she pleased or watch t.v through out the day. She could not go shopping as she chose and could never buy anything she fancied.
Now Shalini was taught to live in a budget and she was taught home management by an efficient and capable mother-in-law. Now she was forced to take more responsibilties and turn over a new leaf.
Initially Shalini found this difficult and complained but there was nobody to listen. Her own parents and husband seemed to have turned against her. The girls whom she had thought of as friends showed their true colors when they realized Shalini had no money to spend.
Very soon Shalini realized this was a better way of living. She was a smart and intelligent girl and soon saw she had to take responsibility to her own life and now that she was going to be a mother she knew she had to grow into being one.
When it was time for Vidya to return, Shalini did not want to let her go. In her mother-in-law she had seen how to become a mother first.
It does not always happen this way in life, but still life and nature are our greatest teachers. Instead of complaining about the turn of events, if one would just take the moment to reflect and pause to reevaluate, many girls would learn to become a mother first.

 

Usha after seeing so many marraiges in recent times I fear its a possibiltity..

 

Dear Mithila
You are so right.. Not many parents would accept their daughter is wrong.. its an ego problem. also its accepting they have made a mistake. Many mothers who have raised sons know it has not been easy.. and then they hope life would be better when the daughter in-law arrives. Most of the time these girls are pampered and spoilt. In reality I have not seen any hope for these girls. But atleast for the story I wanted it different. Thanks for steppin in.

 

Mindian I am glad you are able to see that many girls are spoilt today. And if they would listen to the wisdom of the parents..

 

Paulina I am so glad you caught the essence so well.. now in real life will it work.. thats a different story isnt it? Thank you dear.. your words always inspire me.