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2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the first.

Discussion in 'Toddlers' started by Chitravivek, Sep 3, 2013.

  1. Chitravivek

    Chitravivek Platinum IL'ite

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    Ladies,

    May be my header needs a better wordings but I am just gonna pour what is in my mind here. I am looking out for responses from all second time moms here.. What was your first kids reaction ? Did he/she sense that youre expecting a baby and change his / her behaviour or do you all think the change is totally unrelated to the pregnancy?

    I have no clue if this is my pregnancy hormones or is my kid really going thu a phase right now. She has been refusing to eat anything and everything I offer her this past 10 days. She was always great with food ( Touch wood) but now all problems are setting in. We dont talk about the new baby at all at home. Infact no baby talk. Its always my first kid and that she is important. I checked with her school and they say she is eating well.. So may be something wrong with me or she is sensing something from me :drowning. I just feel like crying (again those stupid hormones )...

    Did anyone had any strange reactions from your kid? Oh please tell me its a phase and will be over soon :bowdown
     
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  2. luckysangeetha

    luckysangeetha Gold IL'ite

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    Re: 2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the fir

    I am not a mom yet but on my observation I would say kids observe us better than we observe us....
    they can sense a new arrival easily and they possessiveness about the new mom....

    So just leave her in her own way and give her loads of love and hugs and kisses and talk some good things about the new arrival like you can play with the new baby and talk to her and all stuff...don't hide or purposefully stop talking... she is feeling odd I guess...
     
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  3. leena999

    leena999 Silver IL'ite

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    Re: 2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the fir

    I think its a temporaray thing and the first child feels slight insecurity, but if you prepare your first child well and don't neglect her, he/she wil get back to normal and will look forward to the second born.

    maybe your hormones are also overreacting.give it some time :)
     
  4. Roopamanju

    Roopamanju Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: 2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the fir

    The problem starts here!!!!!
     
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  5. rose8282

    rose8282 Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: 2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the fir

    My sis has a daughter and recently (almost 2 years) a boy. The elder one was so possessive in the beginning and would sit alone but now she has grown to love her brother and both of them are always on top of each other. I'm sure it will be tough for every first kid to adjust to the new member but they will get the hang of it with time.
    My sis has other problems...both of them refuse to eat!
    I guess it might be a phase she is going through but then that should apply to her at school as well. So my guess is the little one at home. With not talking about the baby at all at home, I think you are doing a lot...maybe she needs time. Could you involve her in activities with the baby...like watching the baby or doing small stuff that she can do. This way she might get closer to the baby?
    I'm not experienced..so you can ignore my post if its of no significance!
     
  6. Vasuma09

    Vasuma09 IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: 2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the fir

    Hey Chitra,

    Dont worry this is just a phase and she will be back in form within few days, Can you ask your dh to feed her and see how she is eating with him, if she is ok with his feeding then definitely she might feltl some thing different in you..If you are not discussing anything with your dd regarding new arrival, start doing it slowly tell her taht she is going to have new friend to play with her, because it is always better to prepare them before new arrival..Nowadays I can see lot of difference in my ds behaviour, preveiously he is ok whencer his dad feed him or give him bath now he is expecting me to do each and everything else he is bit upset and go and sitesiin some corner with wet eyes.Anyways I am not giving too much importance to his wierd behaviour, whenever he feels upset I lift him and pamper him wiyh kiss or hug he will be back to form with in few seconds..So prepare your dd slowly ..make sweet talks about new arrival to her ask her for name suggestion meantime tell her that she is the one youe love most..some pamper talks..TAlk to her about newbaby daily...But just watch and see after new arrival they will be more possesive on new born they will not allow anybody to touch lo and they will take good care on new lo..so dont think too much its allbthe magic ofpregnancy hqrmone, stay cool and relax
     
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  7. Chitravivek

    Chitravivek Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: 2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the fir

    Sorry ladies if I have misled some of your here.. The baby is not here yet and I am expecting in FEB -2014 so thats the reason I didnt understand about her change.

    VASUMA: Thanks. Ya may be I will try my DH feeding her and see how she reacts. The reason we didnt talk her about the baby is she really didnt understand and started to think every tummy has a baby so we decided we will take her to one of the scan and show her the baby and slowly start talking to her. I didnt want to overdo and now i feel like i underdid :(
     
  8. rose8282

    rose8282 Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: 2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the fir

    Oh I am sorry Chitra...how stupid of me...inspite of knowing that you are due Feb'14...I just blabbered!! Then I guess you need to prepare her more maybe?

    Edit: once the baby arrives, she might feel it more difficult to accept...maybe you should start preparing her slowly that she will have someone to play etc
     
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  9. Rakhii

    Rakhii Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: 2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the fir

    Chitra, perhaps not talking about the expected baby is the problem? I am not sure. Its possible that the older one is feeling left out. I mean, she knows that something is going on but doesnt know what. Maybe not talking about it is making her antsy? Talking about baby as in...involving her in baby-cloths shopping etc?

    I also hope its just a phase...hang in there.
     
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  10. Chitravivek

    Chitravivek Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: 2nd time Mom and your first Kids reactions/ Effects of your pregnancy on the fir

    Thanks Rakhii. I really hope its a phase. I will try to talk about the baby to her but very slowly. I always want her to know she will be special no matter what. After all that I went thru my first pregnancy she is a precious child and I will love her more than anything. I just hope she senses this from me soon :)
     

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