Positive day 7 It was a beautiful weekend. Had a great Saturday shopping. Bought all the little things pending a from long time. Sunday was again beautiful. Thanks to sun & public park. Dd had so much fun. It was nice to feed all the beautiful ducks & walk through the trail. Nature got so much healing power. Felt fresh!
Am I critical and exacting of my accentuating standards on others. Shape up to my terrorizing contours and substance! Emotions that are so spontaneous in me might be too fraught on others. Whim that is too natural to me might be alarming to others. Communication that is so effusive in me ought to be diligently constructed in others. How can one even sense any approach in an uneven world transmitting inquiry on dissimilar grounds. Are there other forms of emotions and whims and communications? There are, but are they accessible to me. The little girl in me shrieks at the mouthpiece waiting to be heard through it only whilst the kindred reciprocation is through the adjoined receiver. Am I positioned a restricted thinker? Do I care to listen where it should be heard? Incidentally, this week, I happened to recollect an advert in a musical thread. After I pointed out, I watched the advert few times. (Yeh toh tum roz bolthe ho.) I tune into known forms of reciprocation. I say this, you say that. What if the 'that' is not to my preference and familiarity. How would I know about its relay in its unidentified form. Thus, the permeated inquiry, am I being too critical and exacting in my stout disposition to be greeted and agreed upon to my language and sentiment from others. Should I broaden my sensory faculty to perceive amenable connects in forms and gestures that though are orthogonal to my own cheer are still genuine, reasonable and consistent. Let people be people of themselves with their own imprints is what I keep telling myself rather than pander to my cultivated forms of recognized care. Then, I keep telling again. Sometimes they might offer you a cadbury chocolate, sometimes they would just stare into you, sometimes they are startled of even the inquiry -- yeh toh main tumhe roz dilaasa detha hoon par mere andaaz mein, tujhe ehsaas bhi nahi. Positive: In whatever inscrutable and subtle and candied forms they are edging to be heard, just believe and embrace their individuality, Novalis. That, I keep telling again.
March 12th 2019 - listened to bunch of sadhguru speeches. Gave me a focused time at work. Decided to work on clarity every moment
Day 161 : so one person kept annoying me at work place with very personal questions. I told him in a very assertive way that he cannot ask me such personal questions. He did get offended but was sorry. I had to do it for my mental peace. Intrusive questions are a big NO at work place. Day 162 : Got a news about a cousin's wedding. One more occasion to enjoy . Can't wait for it.
A pleasant day at work and at home. Utilizing long bus journeys to chant God's name and it gives me so much joy as I cannot read in a moving vehicle.
Day 163 : A positive day at work. I was working on a complicated structure and there were some construction issues. I suggested some solution but the folks in the US would not listen to it. They were giving a much complicated solution. Then they were asking me to experiment . I was like okay and made up my mind to work on their solution. But when I came to work yesterday morning first mail seeing from them that the client agreed to my solution made my day. Day 164 : The walking which we started last week progressed to jogging. Started mild cardio and felt positive and refreshed to start my day like this.
Mar 13/19: Wicked universe shut my mobile internet connectivity and just wouldn't make it happen until almost the evening. Apps weren't working and Kindle was my best bet to satisfy that itch for some lazy browsing, whenever. By the time connectivity was back on, I had managed to read two long chapters for the day, my longest streak so far in 2019. In fact, in a long while too...last time I achieved such a "miracle feat" ever was in 2016 when Vardha cyclone had turned Chennai powerless for a whole week! The irony when Web turned 30? ...or did I rightfully celebrate going offline? Lol. I'm glad for that glitch. Mar14/19: Yay! It's weekend already! #TGIT!
March 13 2019 - had review meeting with my manager yesterday. It was very satisfying to hear good remarks in the year end appraisal