DH Promised will not abuse me again- Very happy now

Visu2k · Jul 8, 2009

Priyanka, my best wishes with you friend! Always hold your head high and respect yourself and never yield to any form of abuse! I am feeling very happy right now. I did not respond to your previous posts, as other ladies have indeed given you the right direction. Good luck :thumbsup

Visu2k · Jul 8, 2009

More than anything else I am happy that you have taken things that concern you, into your control. Marriage is an equal partnership, both the partners deserve respect and love from each other. No one has the right to abuse the other Good luck again! :thumbsup

vidhkarthik · Jul 9, 2009

Re: physically abusing nad saying sorry again.... Wht to do?

Sweetie..One an abuser always an abuser. You should be very very careful from now on. There is NO NEED to keep forgiving him for his INHUMAN reactions. One slap here and there out of anger - I might - note might live with it...but planned beating black and blue. Aren't his parents ashamed of his actions? Priyanka - The matter doesn't end here. It is very serious and please please think about your decision of living with him once more. NO ONE DESERVES THIS **** - Please understand.

Tridev · Jul 9, 2009

Priyanka, very brave and nice move, this makes me feel you are more strong than your husband, and more balanced person .. Good luck

smart_soul · Jul 9, 2009

Hi Priyanka,
A very bold move. Congrats. I was in fact thinking of pinging you to check if you had the conversation. Glad you did and took things under your control.

GV

priyankav789 · Jul 9, 2009

Hi Shakambari, Prettina,DrPreethi,Amul,Visu,Tridev And Gv

Thanks for your wishes and suggessions.

Hi Vidhkarthik, Sushmakiran

Definetley I will take your suggessions in to consideration.past two days no issues and no more discussions also on this.
My DH felt wrong with him and said sorry infront of everybody. He agreed all his mistakes. He clearly mentioned that he cont live with out me.
His parents really shocked after seeing my physical hurt. They also convinced me a lot. At that time I felt should not hurt my mother, his parents and also him. His parents have given the assurance if it reapetes, I can come out.
My DH took decision of taking some treatement. So, he is going for meditation.
Hope the abuse will not come into picture again. If comes definetly I will follow your & ILties suggessions.

Once again thanks,
Priyanka.

shakambari · Jul 11, 2009

priyankav789;763262 My DH took decision of taking some treatement. So said:

One point to note- what he needs is not meditation but a friendly chat with a marriage counsellor/psychologist because domestic violence is a cycle-it strats with physical abuse-sorry and repentance-silence and irritation-verbal violence-and back to physical abuse.

so deal it with a long term perspective -you will be able to think more calmly and talk out less emotionally, now that the problem is not hot.
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desihubby · Jul 11, 2009

Hi Priyanka,

Very happy for you.

I was intrigued by your fil/mil's offer to return your dowry and your money (rather readily) upon seeing the evidence of abuse. I am suspicious of that offer because they may be lying low until the bruises heal. India, I believe has strong torture laws lately and it's possible that they may have taken the logical route of appeasing you for now and preempting any aggressive action from you and your mom.

It's important that you keep record of such evidence: photographs, records of doctor visits, telling/informing a friend (family members may be interested parties) etc. (By the way, I am not a lawyer; if you feel you need, you might want to check with a lawyer, just in case!)

I hope your inlaws are not scheming and in fact they meant what they said. But it's always useful to be circumspect.

Wish you all the best.

A desi hubby

Nandshyam · Jul 11, 2009

desihubby said: ↑

Hi Priyanka,

Very happy for you.

I was intrigued by your fil/mil's offer to return your dowry and your money (rather readily) upon seeing the evidence of abuse. I am suspicious of that offer because they may be lying low until the bruises heal. India, I believe has strong torture laws lately and it's possible that they may have taken the logical route of appeasing you for now and preempting any aggressive action from you and your mom.

It's important that you keep record of such evidence: photographs, records of doctor visits, telling/informing a friend (family members may be interested parties) etc. (By the way, I am not a lawyer; if you feel you need, you might want to check with a lawyer, just in case!)

I hope your inlaws are not scheming and in fact they meant what they said. But it's always useful to be circumspect.

Wish you all the best.

A desi hubby
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Amen to that...

My exact thoughts..