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Please guys..guide me .. I am so clueless

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by richa2009, Feb 19, 2009.

  1. richa2009

    richa2009 New IL'ite

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    Guys, i am a newbie to this forum. But more I go through this forum, the stronger I feel the need to prepare myself to find a job.I can understand , a lot of time, money is the decisive factor to channelize our lives. I really appreciate the suggestions from all other members about how to jumpstart my career as even i feel this is the hign time for me to build up my career.But I am unable to understand how to start or which way to choose. I am a biology grad with hons and also have a few years of experience in programming. My problem is that I am out of touch with both the subjects for past few years , so I don't know if I am good enough to start afresh or can continue full-time studies.I am quite a lazy person to take studies seriously( i feel bad to admit that, but I had to confess that to you all to get a true advice).Even though I realize only my job can help me survive during our rainy days, I still can't motivate myself consistently to get into full- time studies and all. Guys, I request you all , since you have been helping a lot of people in this forum with your valuable suggestions, can you suggest me some career path or some way to determine what i should do? I feel very guilty for wasting my time,even get dreams almost every night where I picturize myself as a worthless person with no earning, no career, getting hit from everyone around.Please share your experience as to how you all started your career here in USA or what kind of preparations you did.My post might sound very superficial, but believe me , I can't stand the fact that it is my lethargy and lack of motivation that actually present myself to my husband, parents and outside world as an incapable typical home maker not serious about building up a career.Please guys,tell me what to do or which study center etc, i should contact ?
    I'll be eagerly waiting for your response.
     
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  2. ggil

    ggil New IL'ite

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    Hi, you did'nt mention in what type of visa you are in. If you are in a work status, you can easily aproach a school or county education board to see what kind of openings you would get for your education. If there is any community college near by, you can take you certificates for evaluation.Normally WES does the evaluation. Why do'nt you try something like this????
     
  3. peartree

    peartree Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi Richa,

    I understand what you are going through, and I am assuming you are here in the US on a H4 type dependent visa, in which case you can't work. It is however not the end of the world. I was here on a dependent visa too, and felt like a complete loser the first few months, as I was used to being really active back home in India. But after a few months, I started volunteering at our community library. It was nothing major, just stacking and cataloging books. But it was at least something that gave me a chance to get out of the house, and definitely helped my resume. You can check VolunteerMatch - Where Volunteering Begins to look for volunteering opportunities near your place. Though it doesn't pay you, it definitely helps your resume.

    You could also research options to further your education. If you have been in the state where you currently reside for more than a year, you would qualify for instate tuition fee, which is a lot lesser than what foreign students would pay otherwise. You could probably use the time to prepare for GRE or GMAT, depending upon your educational background. You can't do internships or campus jobs if you remain on a H4 visa, but you may qualify for scholarships etc. which would further reduce your financial burden. If you remain on an H4 visa, you are not required to take the number of courses that is normally mandated for full time students, so along with volunteering you can balance your time. This is what I did. I am now pursuing my MS part time and I was just lucky enough to get my EAD, so I could start working. But a lot of my friends from my university/neighborhood are not working, and are doing their MS and volunteering and are quite busy.

    Laziness is only a state of mind, get over the feeling and decide consciously that you want to advance yourself, you will be fine. Never fall into that phase of self-pity. It is the most horrible feeling anyone can have. I know how frustrating it can be, being unable to do anything, but it really is not the end of the world.
     
  4. richa2009

    richa2009 New IL'ite

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    Thank you both ggil and peartree for such quick responses.
    Peartree , thanks for such a helpful post.
    I have my work permit that i have received just a few days ago and haven't used it till date.I seriously doubt, without doing any proper training or course from the community college or school , what kind of job I can look for?How can I even build up my resume without focusing on specific job types?
    I explored the option of voluntary work, but I realized my problem is not how to kill time.My major concern is I have to choose the right career asap to secure our future. I analyzed my mind set and I things I am not very hard working when it comes to studies. That's why I wanted the effective training or full time school that won't be too extensive but make me equipped with the industry demand to find a job.
    I believe you are doing you ms part time. since I am a hons grad from india, I think I have to prepare for gre in any case to do my grad here , correct? yes, I am in this state for a long time, so I am eligible for in-state tuition fees.Can I ask you a few things before contacting the school:

    1)If I clear my GRE and my grad results are evaluated to check the eligibility, How did you select which major subject you want to choose? is your MS the continuation of your previous educational background? how did you approach to search for jobs or is it releated to your studies?

    2)Do you have any idea which course could be suitable for me considering zoo hons and software programming experience...I know that is a bit silly thing to ask...but how do you actually decide which one is the best for you?And can I do my grad here on part time basis?as your are already doing that, you are the best person to tell me about that and also what are the scopes of getting a jobs after completing studies?

    3)If I have to move out of this state, how will I complete my studies? Do I have to seek admission to other schools in another state as a transfer student?

    4)Can you give me an estimate as to how much generally a foreign students has to pay for his/her grad and how much one is expected to pay as in-state tuition fee as you mentioned it is lot less.

    5) I guess if I join the community college( we have hillsborough community college campus in Fl) , I don't have to take GRE for that, correct? but in that case what is the prospect after doing any course.My major concern is which course should I join?

    6)My last question to you and all my friends in the forum: I am interested in full-time nursing course, but I know nothing about which college in Florida should I contact, what are the eligibility criteria, course fee and also placements,and of course how hard the study is?If anyone can unfold some information about nursing career, I'll highly appreciate that.

    I really look forward to hearing more suggestions and also the experiences of my fellow members who are already working.
    Thanks a lot guys.
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2009
  5. peartree

    peartree Platinum IL'ite

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    Richa

    Consider yourself fortunate that you have a work permit. There are so many people here who are so capable, so intelligent, but cannot work due to visa restrictions. And I would also advice you to get out of the mind set that you are not cut out for hard work etc... you are feeling motivated enough to start doing something, so it should be easy for you to get out of that. Think of all this time you have been at home a good, well deserved break, and move out of that phase.

    I found this when I googled, - http://www.hccfl.edu/media/27036/health.pdf

    Let me know if that was any help. I would suggest you to go and talk to the counselor at the college, they are usually very helpful.


    To answer your questions -

    1) I already had an MBA from India, and though I would have liked to do an MBA here, I did not have my GMAT scores and I thought that I would need extensive work experience to pursue an MBA, which was not the case in my university. So I ended up taking up an MS in HR Management after writing my GRE. So that was a mistake on my part, to not have researched enough. So I would suggest you to look at the programs offered by the university, research each of them, and then talk to the advisors of the programs you are interested in. They are usually very helpful and very receptive. As for the job, I just kept applying and applying and applying, and finally got a job in a Desi Consultancy Office. I was not too comfortable with the kind of work, so I quit in 4 months, and currently work for a different company in a core HR role.

    2) I am not sure of what might be suitable for you, but the convenience in this country's education system is that you can jump from any background to a completely different one, just by taking some prerequisite courses. Again, research enough to find out what interests you most, and work towards that.

    3) If there are comparable courses in the university you transfer to, to what you have already finished, I believe you can. But I think there is a limit to the number of credits you can transfer. I know you can do it when you transfer from universities within Texas, I am not sure though about other states.

    4) I study in a State University, and the fees is not a lot. I take 2-3 courses each semester, and pay about $2500 for tuition for 3 courses. I get waiver for other fees like insurance etc. since I have coverage from my husband's company. I am not sure about the fees in other states/ universities. Even with in TX, I know that UT is a lot more expensive compared to Texas State University.

    5) You don't require GRE for courses at community colleges, per my knowledge. Again, the counselor at the college would be the best person to answer your questions.

    Hope I've been of some help! Let me know if you need any other information, and I will certainly try to get it for you. All the best! :)
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2009
  6. infinitehopes

    infinitehopes Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Richa2009,
    Other ILites have given you very good guidence on how to kickstart.

    I just want to ask you a few questions - just to clear up your thoughts. This is based on what you have confessed to i.e. you are not very inclined towards pursuing studies, feel lazy to actually go out and do things.. and stuff like that.

    So I feel, take some time to understand
    1. Why do you feel forced to get a job?
    Is it because
    - you see so many problems being posted by ILites here and some of them attributed to lack of financial independence?
    - or becuase you want to prove that you are not worthless by doing a job and supporting family financially?
    - or do you anticipate bad times to come because of this economy?
    - or some other reason..

    I feel unless there is either a real need or drive, you will not feel satisfied no matter what you do. And you will feel like you are trapped.

    So that's a philophical answer to your query.

    Apart from this, I also would like to suggest that don't feel forced to choose a career similar to your friends and family.

    May be you have different interests like in Arts, tourism, setting up a small business or other things. Why don't u look into options apart from IT and further studies?

    Just my thoughts - and that too because you are given a second chance to think about what you really want in life !
     
  7. richa2009

    richa2009 New IL'ite

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    peartree

    Thanks so much for taking your time to pen down those trivial information . I have started searching for different options online and will contact the local schools very soon.The reason I asked you about job prospect after completing course from community college is that HCC is not very popular among students due to its "not up to the mark" infrastructure, faculty members and poor placement services.But I'll definitely go and meet them in person.
    I realize I have to search different options online before I approach any school...Thanks again for you suggestions.I'll definitely get back to you once I get more info.
    One thing I forgot to ask you, if I get pregnant and have to take some time off and resume after few months , is that possible during full time/part time schooling?

    Hi Infinitehopes.

    the reasons you have mentioned are all true.I need to keep myself engaged and need to earn for myself as I used to do before marriage. Because that was the reason for my self esteem and I feel when a girl works, she is treated with more respect and gravity by her friends and family.Aside from that,I feel sorry for my DH who has to work very hard not even caring much about his health and recreations and calculate every step possible for the betterment of our lifestyle and also to get a secure future.Though he is doing very good, I can understand ,without dual income ,it is almost next to impossible to achieve all that your want in life and things will stall after a certain point of time. I have a lot of relatives around here and all of them are very very settled in their lives only because they were smart and realistic enough to make their choices on time.Same story in India too.As I used to lead a pretty active lifestyle and be quite serious about my professional career , people around me are still curious why I became so homely out of the blue.So this also compels me to rethink that though I am not busy with other things in life.. why I became like that after a few years of "h4 vacation period".
    Also I feel the urge to stand by my parents financially in next 5/6 years as I can anticipate because of lifestyle change, medication and all the expenses things are expected to be harder for the middle class people several year later after retirement.

    As you have mentioned about exploring other options like arts tourism etc., can you be a little more specific about other opportunities that might help?

    I did QA training last year , but due to the economic downfall, I am not able to find relevant jobs as most jobs are for experienced candidates with considerable amount of working knowledge.
     
    Last edited: Feb 20, 2009
  8. mridusudha

    mridusudha Silver IL'ite

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    Richa,
    You said you are interested in nursing course...Try contacting a community college first...I don't know specific colleges in Florida but pretty much every city has a community college..So if you do some research you will find one..Then try contacting a counsellor in the relevant department...Usually they are very helpful....

    Regarding choosing a profession, I am sorry I guess no one can advise you...You are the best judge...You need to sit down and think what interests you...Try putting your thoughts on paper for each profession...Like what you like and what you don't like..Also, think about the current economic situation..How things are...do a market study and see which profession is gaining popularity or which profession is kind of "recession" proof....Professions like Pharmacist, Accounting and nursing are some of them...There is always a demand for these professions no matter how the economy is...Choose wisely...Just don't spend money on a course just because you want to prove your husband or to prove yourself...
    If you are spending time and money then you need to choose the right one and also the one which interests you...And like I said earlier, no one can decide for you...you are the best judge

    Good luck in deciding what to do...
     
  9. kavya007

    kavya007 Gold IL'ite

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    Hi Richa2009,

    I would suggest that you spend some time everyday in the library or in book stores like Barnes and Nobles reading and researching about different career options. You will get a good variety of career guide books in the career section. Some of the books also have aptitude tests which will help you discover your area of interests and your natural talents. Besides that I would also suggest that you talk to people in diverse fields to get an idea about their work.

    Career Management News, Job Hunting Advice & Salary News at The Wall Street Journal.com - WSJ.com is a very good website for career information. All the best. Don't lose hope. I am sure with a little bit of diligence you will find your dream job.

    Regards,
    Kavya.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 1, 2009
  10. biointel14

    biointel14 New IL'ite

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    Hii Richaa

    I am Mathi from Riverside, southern CA. If you are planning to take GRE/Toefl please me know because i am also in the process of preparing .Preparing alone sometimes makes me boring and lazy . If you are willing we can share things and do voice chat or gtalk prepare and take the exam.

    Let me know your thoughts,
    Mathi
     

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