Living with your spouse's sister(SIL)

Meera.. maybe she was close to her brother before you got married to him.. and now she thinks you have created a rift in their relationship. in any case, her behavior is very wierd. she probably is suffering from some mental illness. but its better u IGNORE her and adjust rather than creating more problems. As raji has suggested, pray and try to get her married soon, as you cannot keep adjusting for long.

 

Dear Meera,

Since your SIL is your age ask your FIL MIL and DH to do their duties as she may need a spouse, and get her married and act like it was not ur decision, sometimes women shown frustrations this way, i think she will be occupied and u will be released from her cluthes. I am sorry if i have given worry advice

 

Hi Meera,

I hope this is not a late reply......

U r in a situation which i m facing even now..... I would suggest the best way is to "ignore"... I agree it is really very difficult at the initial stage...
But still u need to....

Later u ll get used to. The reason behind all this is Jealousy of ur SIL.

There is no way out unless and untill u get her married....

Even her marriage is not a complete resolution, but as such u can escape the daily drama.....

Try to divert your mind from her and all her silly comments and behaviour...

Just realise one thing that your husband's home becomes "YOUR HOME" as soon as u r married - a place were ur heart and soul will belong to - a place where ur family grows.

So just keep ignoring her behaviour till she goes to "HER HOME".:thumbsup



Cheers,
Rohini

 

I dont know if she'll repent ( 50/50 chance at best), but for your own peace of mind find her a guy! she's biologically ready for it, Her frustrated hormones may be making her the shrew she is now.

 

A parents' home is also a daughter's home. Saying that a daughter will have no right in her parents' home after her marriage is very outdated, misogynistic, patriarchal thinking. We live in the 21st century - let's not think like the Dark Ages, please. This is one reason why women in India still do not have equal rights and are still struggling to better their lots, day in and day out.

Meera, I have no advice for you other than to just ignore her. If your MIL tells you to follow her daughter, just tell her that it's not possible. Do not elaborate, do not offer any excuses. Just say that you have your own style, your own wishes and you cannot alter it just because your SIL doesn't like it. Get your husband to back you up during this conversation with your MIL, so that you two present a united front to your in-laws.

As the others have said, she will probably marry soon and after that, you will no longer have to tolerate her day-to-day irritation and interference in your affairs. Good luck!

 

Dear Malyatha,

I guess I have not rightly worded the particular sentence in my previous post.

I never meant that daughters will not have any right in her parents' home......... I mean that when Meera's SIL is married she will start thinking her husband's home as hers and will have to shoulder all the responsibilities of a married life and will not have sufficient time to bother about interfering in Meera's day to day activities as such.

Hope I made my point clear now.....

 

Yes. Thank you for clearing that up, Rohini.

 

please make sure your husband is aware ...and since she is your SIL even if your FIL and MIL know she is wrong they can not say anything.
So talk to your husband so that he does not mistake you.and once she gets married she will know what life is and hopefully change her attitude.so please try to arrange some good alliance for her..a very nice boy.

 

Hi Meera,
Hope this reply is not so late…
Are you sure that she has no psychological problems which forces her parents to be on her side (whatever the matter) just to make her happy or not to create any problems for her? Or else she must be a much pampered child at home but still I don’t think an educated gal in this century can ever behave like this. Discuss all these issues with your DH and ask him if he finds it appropriate for a female of this age to behave like this.
May God give you enough tolerance and courage to tackle these problems…
Regards,
Reshmi