Counseling, the Gita way – part 1

Dear Chitra amma,

yes you are absolutely right..................only expectations lead to all kind of depression
But as humans we tend to expect, however seasoned we are..............
a daughter expects from a mother
a mother expects from a daughter
a wife / husband expect from each other.................since we all are emotionally attatched we expect, so at times when we dont get that basic love from anyone we are depressed................surely its not an argument with you...............its just a feeling straight out of my heart..............

 

Dear Mami & Appa,

A beautiful post.. I had missed your announcement yesterday and was wondering in the morning why no Gita but now I found this thread and went back and checked your last posting in the previous thread....

So appa & mami are taking a break to come back with a big bang...will wait for the same.

Expectation leads to Depression has been the main topic in Gita. But to love with out expecting is a Herculean task and it is not so easy. I think if we have this always in our mind and conciously put some effort whenever we are depressed, we can bounce back to normalcy quickly..what to do you say am I correct.

Leadership qualities in Gita is the best and appa you have brought it out very well. All Leaders has to take note of this appa then we can have healthy leaders around us... This should became the mantra of all Management courses.

 

chitrajee
:bowdown to the way you and cheeniyajee are giving new perspectives to geeta gyan. it is such a new age way of explaining to the youngsters, who otherwise may tell us to take away these books as they are ancient. OLD IS GOLD
In life where ever we expected and got what we wanted(preyas), we were happy but there still are times when we did not get what we wanted but still a new change leads us to better results and this final result(shreyas) gives us the divine happiness. actually our wishes lead to the depression. coz we forget that GOD is ' who draws straight with curved lines' . when our faith is shaken we are depressed.

 

Dear Chith and Cheeniya Sir

It was nice to read the posts. This post came as a pleasant surprise from both of you. When I checked in the morning I could see the post. How could we thank you both enough for all these contributions? You both are taking great efforts in making us understand the concept of Gita. Thank you very much.

I liked all the quotes mentioned by chith. Indeed all are powerful quotes. Very often we are down by the Arjuna Syndrome and do not know what to do in those situations? The emotions that affect Arjuna is the same felt by most of us during troubled times. And the solution to it is very well brought out Lord Krishna through Gita. The root cause of the depression is the expectations and Gita asks us to do our duty without any expectations. When I read about leadership and Gita the image that comes to my mind is Gandhiji.

Love
Vidhi

 

To Chithra and Cheeniya

Dear Chithra:

Thank you for drawing my attention to these posts.

oj

Dear Chithra and Cheeniya:

These were wonderful posts indeed. They deal with some of my favourite quotes from the Geeta. I have read them again today many times over and wondered deeply about possible ways of following Lord Krishna's teaching.

As all of us know, it is not easy, but it is worth trying. We are bound to fail most of the time, at least most of us are made that way, but if we are successful even once, we should feel grateful to God for helping us travel along the path of wisdom.

Quite apart from the quotes you have given, I am reminded about another one. I forget the source, but it is not the Geeta, nor the Upanishads. I saw it engraved on the walls of the Dakshineshwar Temple. It says:

Everytime I visit this temple, I make it a point to go and read the inscription. It helped me immensely through difficult periods of my life. When I felt sinking ever deeper into a hopless quagmire, it kept on showing me the light. It kept my faith in God alive.

Let me share with you one of my recent experiences at this temple. My dil and son were visiting us and they wished to visit Dakshineshwar Temple. We took them along and it happened to be a holiday when long queues form to get a darshan of Goddess Kali. We offered Puja and then tried to get a glimpse of the idol above the heads of the people who thronged at the entrance. It was an impossible task. I felt particularly sad for my dil, since it was her first visit and she is not even a Bengali. But there was little I could do.

So, we sat in a corner of the wide courtyard surrounding the temple and decided to try some other day. My dil also wanted to watch the arati, so I walked over to the temple office to find out the timings for the arati. As I entered the office, the man sitting at the table smiled at me with an expression that said we were long time friends. It was the first time I had seen him. He kept on insisting that I come inside and sit down across the table from him. I was quite puzzled.

Anyway, I asked him about the timings and he asked me in turn, "Are you here with your family?" I told him that was indeed the case and this was especially important since my dil was a South Indian. He said, "Please bring them into this office." My puzzlement increased. I said, "Sir, that won't be necessary. Only tell me about the timings, so that we can come back." But he insisted. Finally, I had no choice but to call them in.

The four of us went in and saw him. Once again he smiled kindly and wrote something on a sheet of paper, which he handed over to one of his assistants. He then looked at me and said, "Please follow him Sir. He will take you there."

Take us where? I was incredulous. But we followed him. This man took us through a passage that was not open to the public and suddenly we found ourselves in the innermost sanctum! Right in front of the famous Kali idol of Dakshineshwar! Only five feet away from her! No crowd, only five or six people at most. I couldn't believe my eyes. This was the first time in my life that I had seen her from such close quarters. My dil of course was absloutely thrilled. Her very first visit and it looked to all of us that the Goddess had actually dragged us into her close proximity. We had not asked for this. It fell on us like God's supreme blessing.

I can never forget this incident. It told me in no uncertain terms that God fulfils your wishes -- which are actually God's own wishes -- when you truly pray for it. He / She does it for you. You are a mere instrument whom he uses to fulfil His/ Her desires.

How did this miracle happen? There is a worldly explanation also. I realized later that the man in the office had seen me on TV several times and did me the favour. But it was not a favour I had asked for. Nor did I go and advertise myself. Whatever happened must have happened at God's bidding.

We are merely inconsequential instruments with whom he plays. He endows us with an ego and smiles gently as he makes us realize that the ego is merely an aspect of human frailty. To shed the ego and realize God's wishes is the only goal for us to follow.

Once again, I admired every bit of wisdom that you brought out of the Geeta. It filled me with humility and gave me the energy to push forwards.

Thank you so much.

oj

 

Dear Mrs. Chitha and Cheeniya Sir,
Really liked this approach of yours which show us what do we need to do at the times of distress and what may be the cause for this situation and how we can overcome. It really helps our mind to soothe down.

OJ da,
Really liked you quote too..and your experiences too..it is an hair-raising one..no doubt in that..

sriniketan

 

Dear Chith and Cheeniya sir,

Thanks for the wonderful post. When I read the above lines, I was reminded of an incident that happened a few years ago. We missed our last bus when we were traveling in Paris on the very first day of our trip. It was pitch dark and we didn't know our way around. Suddenly out of somewhere, a tall, well-built man came and escorted us all the way to the nearby rail station. It was a miracle that he spoke English as we found many did not. He wouldn't take any tips and needless to say his help provided us a lot of mental peace. He did his duty without any expectations, and was a shining example of leadership qualities.

Oj da

Thanks for sharing your wonderful experience at Dakshineshwar Kali Mandir. To make God's Will our will is the only solution.

 

Dear Mrs. C,

I learned in life the hard way about expecting. The moment I stopped expecting....I am more relieved
and I am more clear on my goals in life and peace
at heart.

Thanks once again for a lovely post.