Pay In A Different Coin

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by Thyagarajan, Oct 22, 2020.

  1. swarnamary

    swarnamary Gold IL'ite

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    :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
    this is hilarious sir ji...
    silly guy thought something :roflmao::roflmao:
     
  2. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    After marriage, my friend’s Mom and Dad were in a function hosted by one of the friends of his dad.

    Now, his dad was this shy, introvert and quiet kind of person with a broken English, born and brought up in a rural area, who then shifted to Madras now Chennai (with family) during high school and somehow made himself to be a Chartered Accountant.

    Whereas, his mom was this outspoken, extrovert and tomboy type of lady, born and brought up in a defence background, who had an amazing command over languages and was known to be an awesome debater and speaker in her school and college days.

    So, the function that his mom and dad were attending had many of his college friends. One of his college friends, who was known to be a bullish, over-confident and narcissistic kind of person, happened to pass by his mom and dad.

    “Hey Bathla,” he said, “Never knew a guy like you would get married one day and that too, to a lady like her.”

    And then, he started laughing.

    “Damn, now I feel ashamed of myself,” he continued.

    My friend’s dad didn’t know what to say or how to react and kept mum to such an insult.

    Whereas my friend’s mom gave a broad smile to that guy and said, “Oh please, don’t be ashamed of who you are.”

    The guy gave her puzzled look.

    “I mean, being ashamed of you is your parent’s job, right?,” she said with a smile that was bordering on savage.

    And from that day, that guy never dared to talk with or tease my friend’s dad.
     
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  3. swarnamary

    swarnamary Gold IL'ite

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    :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
     
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  4. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    :hello: Baby Adoption :hello:

    A husband and wife who work for a circus went to an agency to adopt a child, but social workers raised doubts about their suitability:

    So the couple produced photos of their motor home, which was clean and well maintained and equipped with a beautiful nursery.

    The social workers were satisfied, but then raised concerns about the kind of education a child would receive while in the couple's care.

    The husband put their mind at ease, saying "We have arranged for a full-time tutor who will teach the child all the usual subjects along with French, Mandarin, and computer skills."

    Next the social workers expressed concerns about a child being raised in a circus environment.

    The wife explained "Our nanny is a qualified expert in pediatric care, welfare and diet."

    The social workers were finally satisfied and asked "What age child are you hoping to adopt?"

    The husband said "It doesn't really matter, as long as the kid fits in the cannon."
     
  5. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    YOUNG
    SWEET & POLITE
    She was young, sweet and polite.

    One day while taking down dictation, she noticed his fly was open.

    While leaving the room, she courteously said, “Oh, sir, did you know that your barracks door is open?”

    He didn't comprehend her remarks, but later on, he happened to glance down and smiled that his zipper was open.

    He decided to have some fun with his new employee.

    Calling her in, he asked, “By the way, miss Priya, when you saw my barracks door kept open this morning, did you also see a soldier standing at attention?”

    Priya his Man Friday, who was quite witty, responded,
    “Why, no sir. All I saw was a little, disabled veteran, sitting on two duffel bags!”


     
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2024
  6. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    Jews Extract
    Two Jewish men, Sid and Al, were sitting facing each other in a Chinese restaurant in posh area of Chennai.
    Sid asked Al, 'Are there any Jewish people of our faith born and raised in China?’
    Al replied, 'I don't know, let's just ask our waiter.'

    When the waiter came by, Al asked him, 'Are there any Chinese Jews?'
    The waiter said, 'I won't be knowing, but I will ask the chef. After he returned from the kitchen a few minutes later said, 'No sir, no Chinese Jews.'

    Al wasn't really satisfied with that and asked, 'Are you absolutely sure?'
    The waiter, realizing he was dealing with 'foreigners' gave diplomatic reply, 'I shall check again,' and went back into the kitchen.

    While the waiter was away in the kitchen, Sid said, 'I find it hard to believe that there are no Jews in China. Our people are scattered everywhere.'

    The waiter returned and said, 'The Chef and the Captain my boss and they all say there is no Chinese Jews.'

    'Are you certain?' Al asked once again, 'I just can't believe there are no Chinese Jews!'

    Listen, I asked EVERYONE,' replied the frustrated waiter. 'All we have is Mango Jews, Pineapple Jews, Orange Jews, Coconut Jews & Tomato Jews!

    But No Chinese Jews. OK!
     

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