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What Are The Steps To Take For Divorce

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by snehalJoshi, Aug 4, 2021.

  1. lavani

    lavani Platinum IL'ite

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    sorry you had to go through so much. normally i do not respond other than OP. Neither i am any moderator or want to be.

    I feel the thread is getting sidetracked. Also i think OP , when time permits should respond on how this information is helpful.
     
    SuiDhaaga likes this.
  2. Aarushi

    Aarushi Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi OP,

    here are my answers based on my own personal experience-
    1) It does not matter what he tells the kids. You just need to sit down with them and tell them that mommy is not happy with daddy and it is not working out for you to stay with their dad. Tell them that both of you still love them and they will still have both parents in their life. And it is NoT their fault. Just keep reiterating that and you should be fine. Most us schools have support groups for kids whose parents are going through separation or divorce so that will helpful for them. Additional therapy will also help in this.
    2) if he abuses you, please please record an audio or preferably a video. Otherwise he might lie and say that you abused him. And then it becomes a case of he said/she said.
    3) go and meet with a divorce lawyer ASAP to understand your options.
    4) even if you got married in India, you can get divorced here in the US.
    5) your kids love the best version of their dad which it seems he is not always. How he is treating you in front of them can constitute child abuse in fact.
    6) it took me forever to call 911 in my case because I was also scared but once I did it, it was helpful. They gave him a warning but did not arrest him because there were no bruises that time, only verbal abuse. He stopped the physical abuse after that. Once I filed for divorce, he started threatening me at which point, I went to family court and got a protective order. Which basically meant that police came, gave him the order and he had to leave the house immediately after packing his bags in 1 hour. I did not have to see him after that alone. It was the best decision of my life. Made my life sooooo peaceful. Kids were 100% happier after that because they did not have to see the constant abuse or arguments any more. They got to be with each parent individually so it was much better for them.

    hope this helps. Take care and let me know if you have any further questions.
     
    Laks09, Rihana, BhumiBabe and 3 others like this.
  3. chanchitra

    chanchitra Platinum IL'ite

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    hi there.
    what will happen after the cops are called in USA. can you give more information?
     
  4. ProudIndian

    ProudIndian Gold IL'ite

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    You should create separate thread for your question. This might be helpful for many people.
     
  5. rosequeen

    rosequeen Bronze IL'ite

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    Separate section of law deals with it. Its complicated and there are many steps between arrest and conviction. Our general advice to Indian women is to not contact police unless they fear immediate violence. It is high escalation path and depends on husbands fear of becoming a criminal. There are too many instances where the man decides his life is over and he has to take down entire family.
     
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