Feeling Bad..

I may also feel the same when the time comes. Rest of the things are very much similar to me. We change with time but it's nowhere taught how to grow up.

 

That was a pretty good essay....even on an off day! Not an easy thing to do.
Would close relative going far be more or less bothersome than [an equally despised] not so close relative moving to a neighboring country ?

Member @Amica had posted to observe that cheap communications on the phone and video had sustained the family dramas even though the collective family had been split apart to live far far away from one another (LINK). Your life may not change, so long as you have broadband connections. Intra-family hate will live for ever and make you happy.

 

Weren't you disturbed by their activities.
Distance always make the heart fonder.
You can always keep in touch with them through phone.
Life goes on.
Once your kids school starts, look into a job or even volunteer.

 

The jotting gives a feel as though I am in church behind a curtain and confess to Father of my alleged sins and seek benevolence, compassion and wipe off the negatives from heart.

I am reminded of the adage familiarity breeds contempt. They were close and took you for granted and handed out trauma.

Close relatives seemingly innocuous but derive pleasure by hurting others frequently with their words and actions do feel sad when compelling circumstances distance them from us.
But in the heart of heart, we are glad - now and then - they prosper well afar.
Your feel for their absence now is normal and genuine and no need to have compunction.

 

You did put your effort which proved to be futile. Don't be hard on yourself. Some relationships are tricky. Loosing them is equally traumatic as keeping them in our lives. But, relationships needs investment from all involved. You cannot beat yourself up for the failures on their part. Loosing is always painful, small or big, tangible or intangible.

 

Let me analyse this...maybe you want the relatives to be nice to you so that you can have a good relationship with them. You are a good person with realistic expectations but as that didn't materialize you are feeling angry because the opposite is happening which is not in your control.

I replied to you in a diff thread as well. We should learn to co-exist with every human we encounter on this earth without being carried away. Live and let live should be the mantra. Your happiness cannot depend on how others react ,eat, live or think but infact should be a product of many of our own personal factors. People stay in our world so we should not give them remote control. It takes time to heal our wounds at their expense so please don't get into this.

If you understand Telugu, please watch Ramuism episodes on Youtube . Anyone who watches that or have already watched can leave a comment here. I recommend you to watch the 'friends' episode. You can substitute relatives for friends and see what difference it can make to you.

Good luck !