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The Goodbyes Of Many Things

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Rihana, Oct 1, 2020.

  1. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra Finest Post Winner

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    Hi Rihana,

    I am sorry for being late to the party to bid goodbye. If I come after @Amica, it means I am way too late. Amica already sanctioned you as a winner of the popular vote whether you win the electoral college or not. Every day is worth waiting to read one of your snippets. Every one of them is pleasant to read whether you write about Sambhar or your desk. "Amma how do I" to "How do I use this Bluetooth" to describe your journey is extraordinary. You deserve "Very good", "Excellent" and "10 out of 10" in a red pen for this snippet too before it moves to older year pages in the snippet section.

    My life can be divided into three stages.

    1) When I am attached to everything and anything
    2) When I pretended to be detached
    3) When I am detached

    Let me start with the first part. I never gave up on anything. My thing and my room are special to me. Once my mother gave away one of my Lego blocks set to my cousin without my permission. I cried enough to make my mother run down to the bus stop and confiscate the set and bring it back from my aunt. It is all about my room, my toys, my slippers, my shoes, my outfits, my, my, and my during those days.

    Post Bobby period, I began my journey to understand the world is also filled with sadness and disappointments. Slowly, I learned how to pretend to be detached. Marriage further reinforced this belief, "that everything that is my wife's is hers and everything that is mine is her's too."

    The last 15 years of my life are about actually practicing true detachment. One fine day, I woke up with a mindset "What I own, owns me back". I became aware of this danger and truly started practicing the detachment. I held everything like a trustee with a mindset that I am given a right to possess something and I have the right only to protect and preserve everything but no right to own anything. That changed everything in the way I was looking at people and inanimate objects. Letting go became easier. Not only that what I possess now, I deal with it as though it doesn't belong to me and I only have the right to preserve and protect it as long as it is in my possession. I am hoping this attitude will help me that all the people I love and all things I possess will get into another trustee as trustworthy or even better than I was when it is time for me to leave. I could be wrong but this is where I am.

    Viswa
     
    Last edited: Oct 3, 2020
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  2. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Thank you, Viji meri jaan. So nice to see a response from you and such a nice looong one. It feels like the joy of reading the thicker Amar Chitra Katha that used to have more than the usual 31 or 32 pages.

    I am very sorry to hear about your friend's passing away, Viji. You have written fondly about her in your snippets. She became like the "my sister" or "my cousin" that my friends talk about -- even without knowing that sister or cousin of your friend you think about them now and then.

    Oh that reminds me.. I have never said goodbye to a computer as we kind of don't give them away or recycle in any way. Better-half says that the "cleaning" of the hard disk is never perfect.

    Thank you again for the lovely response, Viji. It's been a long Friday, struggling with a work issue outside my control. Your post renewed the spirit.
     
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  3. iyerviji

    iyerviji IL Hall of Fame

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    Glad my post renewed your spirit and liked my response
    Love you my jaan
     
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  4. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Arey rey! How far was home or hostel from the college?

    I was lucky that textbooks sort of came back to me. My older sibling got them brand new, then they went to a kid a year younger, and again to a kid a year younger, and then to me. By then their state was tattered enough that no more giving away. And in between, if the textbooks changed, neighborhood folks were happy to let me have the discontinued ones.

    The things you have lost seem to indicate that you've been blessed with an interesting and bountiful life. : ) Nice.

    I remember that snippet. Was among the first ones that had me thinking, here's someone with distinct style of writing.

    Thank you! Your posts, writing and sense of humor and the occasional God "signature" remind me of someone. One day I will write the who and why.
     
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  5. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    LOL. I am sure they keep a sharp eye on you when you visit them. : )

    Good to see you back in action, Amica. Fursat mein, when free, please to share your flower buying preferences: Pathetic Woman Buying Flowers For Herself
     
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  6. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    All due to you only, Viswa, you only.

    There is no way I am going to be able to do justice to the responses, including this one. The good thing is I have some sort of agreement with nostalgia that I will engage with it only till it is pleasant company. So, I can read all the warm memories all are sharing without feeling morose or sad in any way.

    Post Bobby. : ) : ) : ) : )

    This reminds me of a philosophical discussion a friend and I once had. She said parents should practice a certain detachment in the love for their child. It remains one of those debates that continue for decades with no particular quest for conclusion.
     
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  7. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    :hello:
    Life was hard till I got into employment in Mumbai.
    Long back you promised to write. Still outstanding!

    Thanks for recognition.
    About 3 kms from home to faculty class room in a huge complex.
    The need to jump out was the breakfast for which mess would be closed at 8 AM.
    Hence I gave the attendance and slipped from “entropy”.

    Thanks for detailed reading of my FB and response.
    God Bless.
     
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  8. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    My father. In some distinct ways.

    More about this later, much later. Those memories are like an uploaded yet still-being-processed YouTube video. : )
    videoun.PNG
     
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  9. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    :hello:I read that camel mother would kick with her legs the just born her calf to make it get up, stand and suckle. But this is attachment or detachment I don’t know. In the animal kingdom certain species after their birth have to fend themselves.
     
  10. Amica

    Amica IL Hall of Fame

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    I am so sorry for your loss. From your writings, I know she was a good friend to you and also a very sincere and humble person. May she RIP.
    .
     

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