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An Alternative View - Open Marriage

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by nandita24, Oct 23, 2018.

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  1. SinghManisha

    SinghManisha Platinum IL'ite

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    You lady ( or man ??) confuse me. On one hand you keep harping about sexual freedom in a open marriage . Then go on to say you are a proponent of no marriage . Then go on and on and on about the advantages of open marriage. Then claim open marriages are tough it is better to be single. You should join politics my friend . You ramble all over the place.
    It’s good to have one opinion and stick to it sometimes. I have seen your posts as a silent reader before. It seems like you insinuate something . When asked about it you ramble all over the place. My curiosity and interaction with you ends right here. Mostly for my sanity!
    Happy rambling !!
     
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  2. sbonigala

    sbonigala Platinum IL'ite

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    what happens to the child born to a couple in open marriage?
    Wife is pregnant- but husband is not the reason.
    Another woman is pregnant and this husband is the reason.
    Who is financially, emotionally responsible for the two babies?
    Who is whose parents?
    Human mind seeks to explore further from the point where the boundary ends. Letting the mind seek the land beyond the boundary is not always freedom.
    Just because a few people are in open marriage - the traditional marriage doesn't become meaningless.
    How comfortable are we to let our daughters sleep with multiple men or take part in in threessomes or to know that our parents slept with many people.
     
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  3. nandita24

    nandita24 Gold IL'ite

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    Somewhere deep within you agree with what I am saying. But you are in conflict with your deep rooted beliefs.
    The ultimate goal is "marriageless" communities. And open marriages for those unhappy and dissatisfied in their conjugal life. A host of factors inhibit us and therefore I said even though the idea of open marriages is great, coming to terms with it is not easy; like in your case. It is a fact, that open marriages are not everyone's cup of tea.
    The ideal of a marriageless society is relatively easier. Hope you get it.
     
  4. nandita24

    nandita24 Gold IL'ite

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    I have already explained everything. See my earlier posts.
    You are just jumping to conclusions because of your prejudices. Be open to new ideas for a better life.
     
  5. sbonigala

    sbonigala Platinum IL'ite

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    Just like how you strongly believe that open marriage is absolutely great idea for better life, I too, in my own right believe it is not a great idea at all
     
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  6. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    :roflmao:
    I like that fantasy. When what one is married to is a useless thing, you would let the unhappy customer offer that dude to the public. Those who have a sweet deal in a marriage would (naturally!) monopolize what they have:kissingclosed:, and will not yield a share to the others.

    A marriageless society was what existed before marriage came into being. And then there came rules to prohibit the rich/strong taking over as many as he could, so that everybody gets a chance. The marriage scheme evolved into what we have now. Huge variety in the range of unhappiness are possible. Only limited by the imagination of the married people, how they live, whose relatives they live with, how many children, and what sort of economic class they belong to. Everyone will have a plethora (this sounds like a botanical genus, doesn't it?) of more miserable people they can look on for realizing how happy they could be in their marriage.

    With marriages, each one would have the exclusive rights to their own customized personal misery :banana:. Society itself could collapse from boredom, and rootlessness without marriages.
     
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  7. nandita24

    nandita24 Gold IL'ite

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    The solution must be suited to the times. Marriages came into being as it was required in answer to the conditions that existed then. Women were subdued as it was convenient then. Can we do this today?
    A few decades back it was common to see big joint families with lots of children. No doubt there were a lot of advantages, but can we live that way today?
    Of course, I do not believe anything is the absolute "best" solution. Nothing in the world is perfect, but we can achieve excellence. If a particular strategy or system works to one's satisfaction, amen!
    What I have in mind is a holistic approach taking into account the economic and social welfare aspects also.
    Many consider marriages to be boring as well. Since we don't have a credible alternative system in place (till someone dares to experiment) we fear taking a step into an uncertain future which may actually turn out more fulfilling.
    I am just thinking of creative possibilities of a better solution for a more fulfilling life. Just as Karl Marx wrote out his ideas on communism, (which became a reality after his death). Nobody would have appreciated it in his time.
    If you have something better to offer, please do so. Nothing like keeping the mind creatively engaged. If nothing else, it can provide material for fiction/novels.
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2018
  8. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    I knew ( a few days ago ... in a different post) that your open marriage idea would get to Karl.
    upload_2018-11-4_11-39-54.png

    His famous Freudian slip of a quote suggests that a man with abilities should service as many as he could; on the other hand if he were to be gay, he too would get what he needs.
    Yes. Go and check out the Freudo-Marxian notions on wikipedia and beyond.
     
  9. silentlistener

    silentlistener Silver IL'ite

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    "Marriage less society" ? Something similar to animal kingdom ?

    Then what should human beings do for courtship and mating in a marriage less society ?
     
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  10. nandita24

    nandita24 Gold IL'ite

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    I referred to Marx only to emphasize how radical thoughts considered impractical at one point of time become the accepted norm in another era. Incidentally I am no admirer of Marx and do not subscribe to his ideas.
     
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