going for 3rd one..Am I crazy ?

I can only speak from my own experiences. Take this with a grain of salt and remember that this is a decision you must make with your husband, not because someone on e Internet said it would be a good idea or a bad idea.

I'm a single parent of two. 7yrs and 2yrs. My 7yr old is severely disabled. It is a LOT of work to raise one kid, let alone two, especially if you'll be doing most of the parenting yourself. If you think you can handle that, and your job, maybe a third child isn't a bad idea for you.

My aunt and uncle had four. They all said that going from one kid to two kids was hard, and going from two kids to three kids was harder, but going from three to four was a cakewalk (I guess because they were already "outnumbered," what was one more?)

Some experts recommend two or three years between each kid, so you're not crazy for that in itself.

Again, it's something you have to decide with your husband.

 

Hi

My opinion is that, if you can provide one more child with good education,living,all necessities and also not regret it. Then go for it.Else if you feel even 1% that the kid will be burden then please let it be. JMO

 

Kavitha...If you can and want to, just go for it. I was always happy to be the only child of my parents. Pampered and spoilt and all that.

I am a single male, living abroad. My dad is a widower. I lost my mom last year. My mom and dad were NRIs too. Until mom was alive, I always felt like I had a home to go to, I have a family to fall back on and all that. Once she was no more, just after her last rites, my dad said this: "We are no more a family". Those words still ring in my ears. He was of the perception that we are just two men, who cannot live under the same roof for 3 days in a row without arguing and just the two of us cannot be a family. There was some truth to his words.

What really bothers me is that, if my dad is no more too, I am an orphan. I so much wish that I had two or three siblings. Someday your kids will need more than just mom and dad to fall back on when they need a family.

 

Hi Kavitha,

Before I could write anything let me give you a lil of my background. I am Kavitha too and no suprise that I have a very strong desire for a 3rd one hmm does the name in itself have something in it..now I am starting to believe in astrology, numerology and what not..just kidding Kavitha. I seldom visit indusladies these days, its been 6 yrs that I moved here to the US now. I have a twins a girl and a boy, but I desperately want a 3rd one..Don't worry your H is not alone, my DH calls me superrrr Crazy. Well I had a lot of opportunity to have a 3rd one(Technically 2nd pregnancy )but 3rd child, he was very firm and I had to abort, it kills me even today. Now my kids are 9 , I still am waiting to see if his mind changes someday. My son is with me, he wants a baby brother. DS went and spoke to DH about his desire to have a baby brother or he says he is happy even if it is a sister, but now DH says the difference between them would be 10 yrs and everyone would laughs also DH is going to turn 40 in feb 2017. Well he has a lots of reason to say NO. But I am like.. .As far as managing goes. with a twins I managed alone, I didn't have help and my DD had a lot of complications, for people who know my history know about her issues and the struggle. By God's grace she is doing fine now, but she still has some challenges that I know are a inevitable part of her life and few from the education point of view like the ADD and ADHD, I'll have to work along with her it she graduates. I know that and I am mentally prepared for that, I do not have any regrets and will never have even if I had another child.

All these days my H made me feel like I was stupid to think of something like this as his friends , mine, neighbors all Indian I mean have just 1 or 2. Well, now I know I am not Stupid or Crazy and that I am not alone.. Thanks to Indusladies, I logged in after such a long gap. And Thanks to you Kavitha..I will start convincing DH again tonight after he is back from work.. (Wish me luck) and one Q , do you all think a 10 yrs gap between kids will be an issue tomorrow?

Thanks

 

Oh Wow! I just notice it is a 2013 post..hmm sorry, but incase you take a look , Let me know Kavitha, do you have a 3rd one?

 

Actually if you are financially sound and can afford help ,you can surely go for a third one.
2 things to consider though..

1)wait for atleast 3 years gap after the second kid, coz it will feel better for you
2) consider your health.lot of women are healthy having 3 kids but you know about yourself.

I think family will look beautiful with three.since,I have kids out of fertility treatment,i cannot go for another coz of my health

 

lol me too,just noticed after I wrote back for this thread)

 

I often have dreams of having a third child.
A few days back I had a cute little golu molo daughter in my dream.
I told my family.
DH:You are crazyToo late ...Too late
Daughter 1-----ewwwww nahi!!!
Daughter 2-------Awwww sachi ...please please.
I think we could have managed a third one... sigh!!!

 

daughter again, huh?? why not son