Husband disrespects,hurts and emotionally distant

Like others have said he wont change but you can be more prepared mentally physically financially and emotionally to lead your life with or without him

End of the day you can control only your life and change only your attitude

 

OP..your husband and in-laws understood that you are sensitive and react to their false comments. so they are using it and emotionally black mailing you.
Because they said something...you don't become a bad person or money minded. Don't try to prove that you are not something what they are thinking. Be yourself. Don't try to impress them.Treat your husband and in-laws in the same way they treat you.
Tell your husband that he is not supporting you and kid either emotionally or financially only your parents are supporting you. So you support them.
Stop falling for their false allegations, respect and love yourself. Save money for you and your kid.

 

Why do you want hang on to a person who doesn't love you anymore. I would say move on amicably and am sure you will find someone who love and respect you for who you are. You need to give your life a chance, sometimes it just not meant to be. Please don't do this to yourself it's an abuse . Good luck!

 

If you dont want to leave for whatever reason, at least take control of your finances. Open a new account to which he has no access - many banks open special women accounts. Then only you can have full control. And when you spend on gifts, let the other party know who has done so.

 

You need to own up with your actions. i.e. you need to take accountability for your own actions, since they exactly are what led you to your current situation.


You said you fell in love with him for the care and affection he had for you. If that is what you fell in love with, why are you finding fault with his having or lack of having a career or ambitions now? Clearly back then when you fell in love and married him for 'LOVE' as you wrote his career wasn't important to you and you didnt have enought foresight to study whether he had that trait in him back then. You cannot blame him for that now, can you? Or did you feel back then that his earning capacity was not more important than how he made you feel? You fell for his 'charm' as you said, so you now have to deal with the consequences.


It is his care & affection that you fell in love with, so why don't you try and seek those right now? That should give you your 'LOVE' feelings at least. So do live with his parents like he asked. Why are you talking back to him now about money and your hardwork? Did they occur to you in your past when you fell in love with him? If not then, why bring up now? You fell in love with his care and affection for you, so clearly that is all you seek in him. So don't talkback to him under any circumstance.


Don't try to control him. No woman can control her husband, it is sort of an oxymoron. Instead, let him control you. You did let him control you in your past when his charm gave you love feelings. So, do so now too. You subjugate to his ego, and in return you will receive his care and affection for you, which is really why you fell in love with him in the first place.