Do you share salary matters with friends?

I don't share my salary with anyone except my parents, siblings, and husband (he may have told it to my PILs, too). Anyone else who has asked, I've responded with:

"Enough to take care of my/our needs" and "Enough to keep me/us happy".
There were a few folks that pressed on for numbers and I said "I don't share private details like that" or "It's none of your business". Sometimes, I'll even say "What do YOU think I make?" and I'm often amused by their reaction. You can tell they're trying to size you up...and usually the well-intentioned ones will change the topic themselves so that they don't offend you with too low of a salary.

I recently had to use the "I'm sorry, I don't share that info" with a female relative in my inlaw's side (my MIL's older co-sis who often instigates arguments in the ILs side so you KNOW that ain't nothing good coming out of her knowing that info)...and she was shocked that I said that to her. She repeated the question to me once more and well...I smiled and repeated: "Sorry, that information is private and not something I share. I hope you understand." That was that. PIL and DH got a kick out of that one.

I'm usually very polite and talkative about most things but I hate it when anyone asks me about my salary, or other private details. I never ask anyone either including my husband — he offered it up himself back when he proposed. I've been that way the whole time — from the point that I took my first job, to the point where I'm at now. I don't see anything good coming out of it and I know that once my husband shared with my PILs that I make more than him and his brother combined (despite me having told him that I don't want him to share with anyone how much I make), they've begun pressuring my BIL to be more aggressive about his salary and my cosis to seek a job.

No one except your own parents are likely ever going to ask for the right reasons....and nothing good can really come of it. It becomes an item for folks to scrutinize, compare, and affirm if they've sized you up correctly in their minds. If it's anything that they perceive as low, then they will be smug or try to make you feel bad about it. If it's higher than what they were expecting to hear, then they will be unhappy. You should especially never share it with relatives because some can be pretty shameless about asking for money.

 

Before asking, your close friends can assume your salary based on your "company name", your background and years of experience. So, any vague answers would either make the other person come up with direct questions or feeling offended as if you are hiding.
Because asking such questions are part and parcel of our culture here.

It is a matter of how you handle the situation. For ex.. I had a sound career. Anyone would know how much my salary would have been. They could assume, and sometimes people assume more than what I earned then.
So, as you said, I was the "successful earner" in the gang. I had quite a lot of experience 1) paying the bills, 2) offering transport 3) doing things for free just because I was considered successful than the average. I did them gracefully, although sometimes I feel I am trapped.

Now, I am at break. Got to work with a temporary consultancy job, which pays average salary only. This fits to my need very well.
Now also I don't mind sharing my details with others, as I think they know anyway.
This way, someone else is at the top in our gang. But I never felt inferior or upset or jealous for what my friend is making.
I am happy either to share the bill or pull the legs of my friend who has high salary, so that she will pay.
It all depends on how much self confidence you have.

 

I don't share it as well. If someone does ask, i would respond saying

"You shouldn't ask women their age & their salary"

or if its a person of same batch and a friend,
"not too different from what you earn i guess..just do a +-10%"

 

It always depends on the trust & the level of relation you have with your friends......if they are trust worthy & are your best buddies very close to your heart, then you can share your salary details.....

My personal experience: I shared my salary details with my very close & best friends.

But with one of our friends, I just replied politely with a smile....It's personal & confidential....I don't care what they think about my response, bcoz based on my previous experience with this particular friend, who has a habbit of taunting or comparing things.....so i thought better not to reveal to avoid further discussions about money matters (like you both are earning, what do you do with your salary & you people are rich, it goes on like this)...very irritating....so better to avoid......

 

Just go online - put name or type of company, type of job, location of job - and people can find approx salary info range. Ask them to do that if they are interested, since Google-search Uncle/Aunty is everyone's friend

 

most of my relatives keep asking me how much i earn..I simply reply it cannot be told how much elder the person may be. If it is my friend or stranger in IT then I may share.

 

U can share salary .. Dont share if u r working in same company + same profile..

Bcoz everyones appraisal is different from one another..