Two children under 2 years of age

Minkis · Sep 8, 2014

Hi, I have a 9 month old baby and just found out am pregnant again! I have apt. tomorrow with dr to find out if I am medically fit to have the baby. In meantime, both hubby and I are nervous about how to handle 2 kids under age of two and the pregnancy too. By the time the 2nd baby arrives my first will be 17 months, not sure what to expect in terms of behavior.

Would like to know if there are any other parents out there in similar situation, how do they handle day to day routine.

Is is it possible to take care if 2 small kids with no help. I live in USA, just moved to new city, don't have a social circle or relatives. We will also be alone during the pregnancy , with no help from India.

any suggestions, thanks,

minki

anika987 · Sep 8, 2014

Hi dear,

I am a mom of twins!! though they drive me crazy at times..life cannot feel more blessed!!

Not to make you feel bad,you just have been more careful though..
anyways...I know it is tough ..very tough to handle two kids close to age!
that too without any help.However,if u go with abortion..u may or maynot conceive again.if u do,well and good.If not..the guilt might kill u.

If I were u,no matter how tough it is..I WILL have the child.It will be super crazy for you for few years but it will be awesome after that.Can you get help from a nanny or something?how financially secure are you?work out the options.

You can do it!!!

tashidelek2002 · Sep 8, 2014

Well, women all over the earth have this spacing and survive it...you can do it too. My poor grandmother had her first two 11 months apart....can you believe? The bad part is you are going to be a bit hectic for 2-3 years but the good part is you have your family (unless you are going for more) and once they hit school age you can get relief. I personally think the spacing will work out well in the long run. You might investigate a YMCA membership so you can take both of them to swim classes and other classes.

Weasly · Sep 8, 2014

Hey all the best dear !! And congratulations !! I am sure you will be able to manage !! I have no experience but my sister had twins and she managed, she wasnt working though !! All the very best !!

ramyaramani · Sep 8, 2014

@Minki Welcome to IndusLadies

Congratulations! You are definitely in for a ride. It is scary and tiring but at the end of the day it will be a happy one too. My DD was 26 months when DS was born.

1. Prepare your toddler for the new arrival. Believe me they understand much more than we think.
2. Engage your toddler in some other activity or place like preschool or day care etc. Start doing this immediately. This will help relive the stress for you and your toddler. This is the most important thing. This is the bottom line for managing with no help.
3. It could go two ways: Your toddler is not bothered about the baby or your toddler becomes jealous. So be prepared for it.

aparnag · Sep 8, 2014

hi congratulations..

I have 2 kids they r just 18 months apart.. infact a lil less..
DD was 10 months when i conceived.. But my case it was a planned pregnancy since i wanted 2 kids and the age gap to be less..
For sure the first two years will be tiring.. but girl trust me you will be a cool mom for rest of the years to come..
DDis 6.3 now and DS is 4.9.. IM having total fun.
All the best..

Sunshinebeauty · Sep 9, 2014

Hi ,

Did u meet the doctor? What did they suggested?

Minkis · Sep 9, 2014

Kalpanasrikanth said: ↑

Hi dear,

I am a mom of twins!! though they drive me crazy at times..life cannot feel more blessed!!

Not to make you feel bad,you just have been more careful though..
anyways...I know it is tough ..very tough to handle two kids close to age!
that too without any help.However,if u go with abortion..u may or maynot conceive again.if u do,well and good.If not..the guilt might kill u.

If I were u,no matter how tough it is..I WILL have the child.It will be super crazy for you for few years but it will be awesome after that.Can you get help from a nanny or something?how financially secure are you?work out the options.

You can do it!!!
Click to expand...

Hi, yes I agree we should have been more careful. For our first child it took us 2 years to conceive at the age of 37 and now at the age of 39 we conceived with no ovulation tests, no planning, no calculating dates..nothing...it was a complete surprise

We are financially secure for now, not sure if we can afford private school in the long run for 2 kids, may have to send to public school. I am looking into how much it would cost to hire a nanny in our area. I am a stay at home mom, so maybe I will also consider a baby-sitter for a few hours.

Thanks for your support!

Minkis

Minkis · Sep 9, 2014

tashidelek2002 said: ↑

Well, women all over the earth have this spacing and survive it...you can do it too. My poor grandmother had her first two 11 months apart....can you believe? The bad part is you are going to be a bit hectic for 2-3 years but the good part is you have your family (unless you are going for more) and once they hit school age you can get relief. I personally think the spacing will work out well in the long run. You might investigate a YMCA membership so you can take both of them to swim classes and other classes.
Click to expand...

Hi, thanks for your reply. Yes I currently take my first to YMCA, swimming, storytime and playtime. So that's why I was wondering how on earth will I take two kids to the same, with the car-seat and stroller

I am still open to the idea of two, my husband is still nervous and confused. We had decided to only have one and are very happy with our little girl..so lets see.

Minkis

Minkis · Sep 9, 2014

ramyaramani said: ↑

@Minki Welcome to IndusLadies

Congratulations! You are definitely in for a ride. It is scary and tiring but at the end of the day it will be a happy one too. My DD was 26 months when DS was born.

1. Prepare your toddler for the new arrival. Believe me they understand much more than we think.
2. Engage your toddler in some other activity or place like preschool or day care etc. Start doing this immediately. This will help relive the stress for you and your toddler. This is the most important thing. This is the bottom line for managing with no help.
3. It could go two ways: Your toddler is not bothered about the baby or your toddler becomes jealous. So be prepared for it.
Click to expand...

Hi Ramya,

thanks. Right now my daughter is very pleasant and easy going. She smiles at everyone, goes to everyone and can play alone happily while I finish errands. As long as her basic needs are met, eating, sleeping etc...she is very mellow. I am not sure if this will continue to be her personality when she becomes older, 14-16 months, when the baby will be due.

I have just looked into day-care close to our home, feel a little guilty as I am a stay at home mom.

Minkis