did I do the right thing with this "friendship"?Plz plz help me..

I don't really see the problem in spending time with her if both of you just need company to get out of your homes occasionally. Knowing how she is and how you feel about her, keep your expectations low.

I personally distance myself from people I consider to be toxic or negative because I have such limited time to myself that I don't have the bandwidth to deal with it (plus I don't care to involve myself in drama). I like to work hard, spend time with people that mean a lot to me and get time to myself. If I walk away from someone feeling low or upset, then why bother? It just defeated the purpose of getting some stress-free time to enjoy myself, right?

Honestly, it sounds like you just need more alternatives to expand your social circle and friends' circle which is not too difficult to do! I would encourage you to look into workshops, fun classes (like dancing, hiking - you can find so many of these on classtivity and meetups.com), organized recreational activities or even consider volunteering at local non profits. These are nice ways to meet like-minded people when our own social networks aren't supportive of what we personally want to do!

 

This is a good point, if you don't want to get close to her and you rekindle your friends after 3 years...then it may lead to more often. But I have found that friendships with that start to fizzle out or if both of you are strapped for time, you will usually fall back into the same pattern of having long periods of time go by until one of you reaches out to deliberately make plans AND have the other agree to the plans.

What I'm saying is that spending time with her again doesn't necessarily mean you need to spend time with her too frequently or get too close.

Your other option is to let it go, don't bother taking the risk (since she lives so close) hanging out and just wait to find new friends. Or rope in your DH to give you company and take you out. Either of these are perfectly fine, too. It all depends on how badly you want to get out of the home.

 

It all depends on how much you can stand her company and your need to get out of the house. If she is bearable then go ahead but just keep reminding yourself you came out to have a good time. Bear and overlook her weaknesses and just focus on the outing. The characteristics you have mentioned can be overlooked if one wants to. It is only if you focus on her that you get into trouble.
If it turns out to be disaster, it does not have to be a never ending factor as you have good excuses such as your home and your kids.
On the other hand if you really find that her qualities are overpowering then look for other alternatives. Friendships can be made anywhere, you just have to look at the appropriate places