It happens only at In-laws's house

Gurpreet,

Recently I heard of a similar case. Same situation brother was asked to give big amt ~80-90 L to only sis. But in that case it was division of ancestral property. They r jointly living in a small apt in big metro city which is now worth ~1 crore. So the MIL told the married sister her bro will inherit that and asked son to come up with the 80-90 L and pay his sis as her share since house and some other investments was going to him after they die. funny thing is both mil /fil are alive and quite young and healthy. Could it be with the child coming yr MIL is thinking of all this property division issue from right now? Have your h clarify with his mom about this. But dont involve in this directly yourself. Let your h deal with and understand his mom and sis mentality.

 

Even in such cases...it is better not to accept this deal.
Instead ask the in laws to give the sibling's share in the will just like the son's share.
It is always better to invest in your property yourself.You will have more control over your life.

We have a similar case in our family. The son was asked to pay the daughter for her share. He spent his years of savings and took loan to pay his sister . Now the parents do not have good relations with his wife and keep threatening to not leave anything for him as it is still their choice.

 

Before before my kid is born , my mil is yelling at me not to buy any clothes as we ll get free clothes.. she had 2 wardrobes full of clothes for her dd's daughters ..

Anyways , ultimately I wont listen to anyone.. but it is disgusting to see some people peeking in each and every moment of life...

Yellow mango , your words are so true.. Unless otherwise a property is in our name , it is of absolutely no use.. There would be many cases where parents utilize son for each and every need and even for luxuries ( of dd and themselves) and finally give all properties to sis ..
In my case also , same thing is happening exactly. Anyway we ll get prop na is her argument.. but it is under litigation and even it is comes , i m damn sure all ll be for daughter

 

Agree Gurpreet,When it comes to property....one should always work to make your own and not depend on parents/ancestral property. Ancestral property should be divided between all heirs.Tell your husband to tell PILs ...we will make our own as we are capable and let sil and her husband make theirs.Tell her she can divide the ancestral property between the heirs....that way you all can enjoy your life with out burdening yourself for your sil.As for clothes....just do what you want.You don't have to inform her about the money you chose to spend on your child.If she believes in some kind of superstition...you can chose a few good pieces and donate the rest.

 

LOL - we usually are at each others throats on a regular basis. But I forget all that when his parents are around, because for every bit of torture they give me, he will support me. He told me one time, about 2 months after marriage, and after seeing how his mother treated me, that he was against marriage because he knew that whichever woman married me would have to face his mom's irritating habits. But I guess, what matters is that he tries to support me, and I on my part never go to him nagging him about his mother. My silent acceptance made him jump to my side of the court.

My own belief - had I complained about everything his mom / parents did, he would never have been my supporter.

 

Oh I totally agree with you. Anyway the law now states that daughters should be given an equal share in inheritance. People keep trying all sorts of things to bypass it but I always think what's the point. It just creates bad feelings between siblings. My post to Gurpreet was just to provide perspective into what may be going on in MIL mind. I dont think G and her h shd take on these kind of financial obligations for future gain or emotional reasons which were after all made by his parents. Its between them and the SIL to clarify.

The funny thing is that property prices have gone up so much that the same house is now like this golden fruit. It is held out like a carrot and used to milk money. Meanwhile ppl are living longer, and associated cost of living, medical expenses towards end of life all have gone up so much but no one thinks of that or factors it in. IMO, It is better sons tell their parents to keep their money and use it for their own maintenance and then what is left afterwards is shared equally.

 

coolguy...i agree with ur point ,same happens for me too...
my MIL prepares customs as per her wish...if it is a custom in which I have to gift MIL...it becomes very important custom....and the customs in which MIL has to give something to DIL...tht custom is not followed in her house....
Same things [COLOR=#009900 !important]happened in[/COLOR] my marriage....not a [COLOR=#009900 !important]single[/COLOR] custom followed where boy's side gives gift to gal's side...hamare yahan ye nahi hota...thts wht my MIL says..

 

Is the thread still hot ??? Gals I want to announce that I had a cute little baby boy last month Thanks in advance for all the good wishes that will pour through..... will update about everything else as I get more settled down in motherhood duties.... bye for now.

 

Congrats.. and this thread will never die... so much was/is/will be going on at IL's place

 

dear sweetshreya,
congrats to u. welcome to motherhood.