How to handle him?

soniap · Jan 16, 2014

I have been married for 2.5 years. My husband is short-tempered. I have told him many times not to shout at me infront of others when he gets angry. He never listed to me. He shouts at me infront of maid/relatives/friends. He is good by nature but sometimes he is over excited and praises me alot and sometimes he gets angry so much so he breaks watever is in his reach. I am unable to handle it. He says anything to me if he is angry. Later he tries to say sorry. But I can not come back to normal till sometime. If I do not come back to normal when he says sorry again he points finger at me. My problem is not with his anger but his way of behaviour when he is angry. He turns his face so badly and tries to throw mobils/ipad at me (though he never has thrown but everytime I feel he will throw). I have problem with his eating habits also. He has gastric trouble but he eats whatever he wants and be in trouble when health spoils. How can I handle him?

Wondergirl137 · Jan 16, 2014

Anger management sessions? Couple counselling? Think about these. Read up on angry spouses and what should be your reaction during his angry moments.
Good Luck!

ivlakshmi · Jan 16, 2014

Why don't you throw something just close to him when u are in anger and see his reaction?

thegirlygirl · Jan 16, 2014

What gastric problem does he suffer from, dear? If it is something serious, then he must take treatment.............some people are very careless with their eating habits, they eat just whatever is in sight.................for his sake, try only to make healthy food at home, don't store junk food, not even for yourself or others in the family, as junk does not benefit anyone...............if he sees other people indulging in good food, he might be tempted, so it is better to avoid it altogether.

Some people easily get annoyed than others, and deal with it by throwing things............but him insulting you in front of others is very wrong, and you should tell him firmly that he should maintain your dignity in front of others.

orchidgb · Jan 16, 2014

join him in yoga classes. it will reduce anger. particular yoga is also there to reduce anger. name i forgot but you can google and found out the name of it.

soniap · Jan 16, 2014

thegirlygirl said: ↑

What gastric problem does he suffer from, dear? If it is something serious, then he must take treatment.............some people are very careless with their eating habits, they eat just whatever is in sight.................for his sake, try only to make healthy food at home, don't store junk food, not even for yourself or others in the family, as junk does not benefit anyone...............if he sees other people indulging in good food, he might be tempted, so it is better to avoid it altogether.

Some people easily get annoyed than others, and deal with it by throwing things............but him insulting you in front of others is very wrong, and you should tell him firmly that he should maintain your dignity in front of others.
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He has problem in eating healthy food. He always wants to eat whatever he likes like biryani or outside food. I tried to give him beetroot juice everyday. He gets annoyed by the smell of it I force him to eat home made food as much as possible but he gets annoyed because I force.. I cook breakfast/full-meal at home in-spite of my heavy work load just because I want him to eat.. I learnt to make good food as he always wants tasty food.. Once he had fever.. he was so stubborn to come to hospital so he shouted at everyone that he doesn't want to come to hospital.. I some how with lots of shouting and fighting took him to hospital and it was very late by then and was reported as dengue.. he had to be put in ICU.. I am really fed up of his stubborn nature.. even my parents are scared to talk to him because he shouts

polymorphic · Jan 17, 2014

He is a big "baby" who never knew how to control his tantrums. Next time, he yells at you.. tell him to stop yelling counting to 3 ... if he does not ..leave the room .closing the door behind u.. do this few times and he will start behaving. and btw, he is already a baby.. dont force him to take food and medicine.. treat him like an adult and dont tolerate this tantrum of "screaming" and "throwing".. 3 yr old do that.. not 30 yr old...
does he have a problem in office as well? if not, clearly, he is abusing you.

thegirlygirl · Jan 18, 2014

So basically he does not suffer from any gastric problem!!................You just want him to eat healthy, as Polymorphic said he is your big baby..........Forcing beetroot juice down someone's throat is no way of making them eat healthily!!....If you want him to eat healthy, then slowly ease him into it...........in a way that he doesn't even realise it...........nobody likes to 'diet', especially men.

saanshre · Jan 18, 2014

Hi dear.
I would suggest that u stop reacting to his anger. Whenever you see his anger fits are about to begin , just go away from his sight. if he follows u then calmly tell him that you will talk to him or even look at him only when he is through with this anger fit. tell him to go to another room till he calms down ; and most importantly never ever answer him when he blames you in anger even if he is wrongly accusing you of something.. Otherwise it will only trigger his wrath.
when he will notice that his anger fails to draw any reaction from you , he will most probably stop doing it as he will have no target to vent his anger on.
I hope it shud help u.