What did MIL actually want to show??

shobhamumbaikar · Jan 11, 2014

A friend of mine had this experience yesterday.

My friend is a lecturer of English in a college of Pune. Her DH is a software engineer. Her MIL required some document to be translated in English from Marathi and gave it to her husband(friend’s fil). Her fil, in turn, gave it to her. Next time when mil asked fil about the status of the work he said dil is doing that. My friend thought she will ask her and so hurried with the work. But MIL didn’t ask my friend anything, rather, after some time again asked FIL only for the status that too in front of my friend and repeated that 2-3 times later on. Never askd anything to DIL while knowing fully well that she is the one doing it.

My friend completed the work and handed over to FIL. He handed it to MIL. The moment her DH came in the evening, MIL gave that document to him saying “very important paper, can’t afford to have mistakes. So please check.” And gave a pen along to correct any mistakes, clearly assuming that there will be some. As DH pointed out a couple of typing errors, MIL was visibly super victorious plus annoyed with FIL(may be for giving it to DIL, though didn’t mention that) and repeatedly mentioned how important it was, to get it corrected through dinner and also afterwards. And in the entire process didn’t say a thing to my friend. Neither appreciation nor correction.

My friend was very upset with MIL behavior and called me and wondered what MIL wanted to show actually. I Didn’t know what to say to her. So sharing with you here.

yellowmango · Jan 11, 2014

MIL probably thinks the DIL is as brainless as her.

Anitap · Jan 11, 2014

What did MIL actually want to show??
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She DID NOT want to show that she is jealous.

shobhamumbaikar · Jan 11, 2014

right..i could understand her attempt at trying to show that her DIL is brainless..but how come she asks fil again and again about he thing knowing that he is not working on it, some one else is..This surprises me a lot. MILs can even make fools of themselves in order to insult dil it seems

MIL probably thinks the DIL is as brainless as her.
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soulful · Jan 11, 2014

She actually wanted to amuse her DIL with her (monkey) antics, unfortunately your friend didn't get the joke.

shobhamumbaikar · Jan 11, 2014

ha ha ha ha right

attentivegirl · Jan 11, 2014

Tell you friend that...."Tuji Mahatari crazy aahe, kaarji karu nakos"

peartree · Jan 13, 2014

Maybe the document was really important anc thr MIL just thought it would be good to have it looked at by another pair of eyes...

arch1209 · Jan 14, 2014

Moral of the story next time Mil and Fil need anything "important" to be done get it done from a professional so that there are no errors and less heart ache or burn. Also since they are paying the professional for their services they don't really need to thank them!

polymorphic · Jan 15, 2014

shobhamumbaikar said: ↑

A friend of mine had this experience yesterday.

My friend is a lecturer of English in a college of Pune. Her DH is a software engineer. Her MIL required some document to be translated in English from Marathi and gave it to her husband(friend’s fil). Her fil, in turn, gave it to her. Next time when mil asked fil about the status of the work he said dil is doing that. My friend thought she will ask her and so hurried with the work. But MIL didn’t ask my friend anything, rather, after some time again asked FIL only for the status that too in front of my friend and repeated that 2-3 times later on. Never askd anything to DIL while knowing fully well that she is the one doing it.

My friend completed the work and handed over to FIL. He handed it to MIL. The moment her DH came in the evening, MIL gave that document to him saying “very important paper, can’t afford to have mistakes. So please check.” And gave a pen along to correct any mistakes, clearly assuming that there will be some. As DH pointed out a couple of typing errors, MIL was visibly super victorious plus annoyed with FIL(may be for giving it to DIL, though didn’t mention that) and repeatedly mentioned how important it was, to get it corrected through dinner and also afterwards. And in the entire process didn’t say a thing to my friend. Neither appreciation nor correction.

My friend was very upset with MIL behavior and called me and wondered what MIL wanted to show actually. I Didn’t know what to say to her. So sharing with you here.
Click to expand...

1.MIL was not happy that she had to depend on DIL for help. It was a hit on her ego. So by asking her husband(fil) and not DIL she probably did not want to acknowledge that DIL is doing it. It almost like "CEO's dont talk to clerks, they ask managers for status "
2. She herself cannot correct and show how her DIL is not smart, so she got her son to correct it.

Next time, ask her to give it to her son in the first place..why should she waste her time if there is no value or happiness because of her help.. These things are very common. DILs try to help MILs but they inturn see it as their own inability to handle things OR they see it as soemthing which the DIL ought to do. THis is just a small effort.. the translate work i mean.. but tell her that this is a lesson for life.. even if she does biggher things to help her MIL her MIL's reaction is always going to be the same..