It happens only at In-laws's house

Dear Padma,

Do not over work for the sake these selfish people. You have to be in good health for the sake of your kid. That's what I tell myself, I have disc prolapse, but these people simply laugh at my discomfort. My kid only suffers, all the other people are fine. Please take care of your health. Consciously minimize your house hold work. See if you can arrange for a maid, or a cook. Please do not suffer for these non humans.

 

adimad,
Please do not be depressed. Everything will change for the better. Please take care of yourself.

 

:ranttsk

Feel like telling them "respect should be earned not demanded"..

dont worry and be happy.. in few weeks, u will be happy holding ur little one..

 

Some more rules laid by my MIL:
1. When you have periods, you have to sit outside with plate and tumbler. Whoever visits will be expalined that you have periods. You should not enter the dining room when they are eating, or else the food that they are eating will get polluted.
2. You have to tuck you kurta, dupatta etc tightly around yourself while moving about in the house, especially when madam mokkai sits royally in the middle of the hall blocking everyone's way.
3. You should always speak in brahmin slang, if you use one word that is not brahmin slang, you will be called sudra.
4. All the traditions followed in my mother's place are actually sudra practice.
5. My mom has completed doctorate, but she is considered cheap because only cheap ladies work.
6. DIL should eat all the left overs, even when pregnant, in MILS house,
7. SILs ILs should eat leftovers in SILs house.
8. DIL is instructed that when SILs ILs come to attend any function earlier than the stipulated time she should give SILs MIL a broom and ask her to sweep the house.
9. SIL is repeatedly adviced over phone to tell her MIL that she will be slapped if SIL gets angry.
10. SIL MIL should not eat any fruits, should drink coffee prepared from stale decoction.....DIL should not eat any fruits unless it is spoilt of course, and should drink coffee prepared from stale decoction.

 

My MIL hated me for becoming pregnant in 3 months, while her daughter had to undergo so many treatments for pregnancy. She used to stare at my tummy whenever I sit down to eat food. She still hates me and my kid. Me and my SIL were pregnant at the same time. One day I heard her talking to her friend on phone that there is a belief that only one kid will survive if two people are pregnant in the same house, it happened with her and her co sis, and she is praying that that one kid should be my SILs. .......I felt so scared, cheated, and terrified to live with her during my pregnancy. She used to tell me so many stories about all kinds of complications during pregnancy.....I am scared to live with her even now, in case I get pregnant with my second child.....I want to run away from her nazar.

 

Blue, best part of these MILs is that they're so used to teaching negative to their daughters for their MIL, that they start assuming that their own DIL is getting same learning.....

Assuming same tune of damage and control, they want to control further.

 

DIL rule: dupatta should be left free flowing during periods so that it will touch her and make her polluted :rotfl:crazy

 

My In laws are so cheap, they just want their DILs to run their household when their both sons are are working in govt. organisations.These incident happened after six months of my marriage.We built a new house at our native so for its Ganesh Pooja we all were going there. My DH was in Delhi that time.This happened in May 2011. When all members were going on 7th & I was going on 15th with MILs Co-sis & her son.
As they reached the native after 2/3 days after reaching my FIL callewd me & told in sweet tone not to come on 15th as Muhurt for pooja is after 20th . I was on leave from 15th to 21st May.I was like :shock:. He said you will took leave and come in rush,if dont get to attend the pooja is doesnt look good. I said ok.

I didn't go my native but to my surprise MILs cosis & her son went as decided on 15th.During this I used called my FIL every day for in general.On 19th I was coming home after office,My one neighbor was asking leena why u are not going to native, Your FIL called us today & they said Ganesha Pooja done today. I was shell shocked.
but I gave her some excuse & came to home.Immediately I called my DH & ask him why your parents did so, even he was also unaware of it.He confronted FIL.
EVENING FIL called me & said why are you making misunderstanding between me & my son & bla bla etc. I didn't utter a word & disconnect the phone.I magine how cheap are they?

 

I actually want to hug her and show her my love ....

 

Exactly ShipaMa. I did not understand why whatever I do seems disrespectful to her. After seeing the way she teaches her daughter to torture her ILs....I understood that she is assuming that I am also like them.....I cannot be like them....though I would love to be....I feel very sad when I talk back.....I have retorted to her a couple of times....[only after discovering this thread]...and felt so guilty afterwards....

Whenever I complain to my mother, she always tells me to be patient, pray to God, at the worst, she says 'ignore her, after all she is old'.....
I was so shocked to see my MIL teach my SIL all these nasty things....after all my MIL and SIL's MIL belong to the same generation right????.............How can she be so mean to her????