Husband does not want to share account details?

And this was not a red flag because......?
They even separated because of it.

 

Get ur salwary credited to a separate account of your own asap!!

 

it happens in some families . my neighbour too had frequently fights over such issues and separated for a few months now also though they are not happy couples, still the husband makes frequent visits and takes his wife out when his help is required and deposits some money in his wife's name for the childrens education

 

Indianguy...are you the same Indianguy from before?

whatever it is, there has to be open communication about financial part in any family. No wonder the wife is pissed off that she was kept in dark. If he had discussed this before, they would have come to a better resolution.

 

If a wife behaved similarly and refused to reveal details then would it be fine?
A married couple has a right to know about the financial transactions and support plans to each other' family.
More than money it hurts being treated like an outsider while the world knows what is going on.
Even a housewife would feel bad.

Its big red flag if DH takes your pay and treats you like cash cow, get a separate account, agree to give a set amount for household expenses.
If DH is secretly supporting his family then he can do it with his salary.
Ignore his tantrums and develop a spine.

 

you know what a 'red flag' means? it means something is not right. keeping secrets within a marriage is not right. that is the first thing that is wrong and second, it is HER salary that he is using without her consent!

 

ah...so he "is" THE Indianguy??

 

:rotfl Didn't 'understand' till Rakhii made it clear :bonk

 

I had a colleague who had lived and worked in US for 4yrs and did not know how to operate an ATM, had no idea abt her money, no access to bank details...heck she even called her husband to ask her own SSN !!! When I asked why did she leave so much on her husband, she said I trust my DH completely & he takes good care of me, so I have no reason to work hard & memorize these details:drowning

Fast forward 2months, her 3yr old asked for a Barbie doll as a birthday gift and her DH refused to give her $20 for that citing it as too expensive a gift (he had bought himself a new iphone the same week). She borrowed $20 from me & gave it back in $5 payments over 4months....

Are men entirely to blame for this situation ?

 

well, this is precisely why I never ever advise women to quit work after baby. I am not saying people should not trust their spouses but sometimes (actually at almost all times) its better to have financial independence.