Past haunting me

reddot · Jul 11, 2013

I grew up outside india. But my parents are indians. I was a rebellious teenager. My parents were always fighting and so i had no peace at home. So I tried to rebel at all times. I lived a promiscous life. But after college, I cleaned up the mess and now I am married and living in US. my husband is an okay guy. But a workaholic. so I was bored being on h4. We are yet to get our green card. We have saved some money to buy a house but we are thinking of buying it after the green card comes. My inlaws are always after the money and husband and I fight often about how to invest this money.

We drifted apart and because i had a lot of time on my hands, I began to write in forums. I caught up with some of my old friends. I met a man online and had an affair with him. Husband found out. We went for counseling and life was smooth for an year. i love pets especially my pet dog daisy. but she has a habit of humping everything. We went walking once with her and she did the deed with another dog and is pregnant now. my husband is taunting me indirectly that my dog is a slut just like me.

i thought that we were past all this. But since he keeps bringing my colorful past, i dont know what to do. I do not love him like i used to. But i do not want to leave my marriage because we are very close to the green card. That will help me earn and stay here because i do not want to go back. i want to know if i will lose my gc if i get divorced now.

zainabsarfraz · Jul 11, 2013

u married him for GC????

cutekid · Jul 11, 2013

Well no spouse can tolerate infedility and can ever forget it.Leave him or live with it.

Mahajanpragati · Jul 11, 2013

if your aim is green card then ignore his taunts & focus on yout career.

if you want your marriage to work,talk to him,admit that what you did was wrong but his comments is making it difficult for you to forget the past incidents so can he please stop them.

MaritalBliss · Jul 11, 2013

Good story..thanks for sharing...so funny I forgot to laugh...v happy for yr dog.

rkgurbani · Jul 11, 2013

I think you need to decide....green card or successful marriage or marriage for green card or your pet dog Daisy or everything of the above

Dovahkiin · Jul 11, 2013

Can I have a puppy?

Dovahkiin · Jul 11, 2013

I dunno if you are for real. But if you are, why did you decide to reconcile? When did he forgive you? Did you express remorse? Was it sincere enough? Does he believe it to be sincere enough? Do you blame your affair on him? What kind of counselling did you attend - Individual or couples? What was YOUR purpose in staying in the marriage and letting the affair go?

You said nothing about this. Yet you claim things were smooth for a year. Your post is more about your GC worries than about your marriage. Rug-sweeping is not smoothing out things. There is always a bump and one day it has to come out. He has entered the anger stage. So it is obvious that you have not done anything to help him through the hurt. Marriage is for responsible people. You screwed up and you still aren't willing to man up (sexist much??) and take the responsibility for helping him heal. And once again you are willing to quit than to try and take it. Sorry OP...If you are for real, once again, this is exactly why I am cynical about love.

Please be a troll.

abinayamadhavan · Jul 11, 2013

How do you get the heart to cheat upon a spouse who is honest to you. why did u marry him then? for a GC?? well. I would say get your GC and just leave him.Atleast his life will be saved. *** should happen only out of love an emotion according to me. Other than that its just a physical attraction. You have gone thro the later.

If you wanna better life, love your husband, be honest to him. Will you accept if your dH has physical intimacy wit another woman