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deeply hurt-----need help

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by michelle2003, Jun 5, 2013.

  1. Nimbu

    Nimbu Silver IL'ite

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    Sorry about your situation..Very pathetic to see humans to behave this way!! I assume you don't have kids. Its not too late think of your future...get back to your mom's place and decide whats best!! Since your are working I don't think you are going to struggle. Cheer up! Take care of your health & relax.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 5, 2013
    1 person likes this.
  2. AS86

    AS86 Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Michelle,

    The only thing I'd like to say is that if you let this incident go without taking a big action, it will happen again, and again and again. I have never seen a case where a man hits a woman just once and never repeats it. So, it is your responsibility to put an end to it right when it started.

    Unfortunately, in our country, usually the daughter-in-law is alone and no one in the inlaws' house stands up for her. So, you have to stand up for yourself. If he told your mother that he won't send you to her place, you go there by yourself. You are not a child. You're an adult and you have a job. So, after acting like an animal with you, your husband doesn't have the right to decide whether he will send you to his mom's place or not.

    If your parents aren't supporting you, I can give you names and numbers of support groups in Delhi that help victims of domestic violence. But, please, it is in your hands to make sure no one dares to treat you like that ever again.

    Much love and hugs to you, dear. Be strong!
     
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  3. ars

    ars Platinum IL'ite

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    Why suicide.
    Call the police and put your fil behind bars for beating you.
     
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  4. peeks

    peeks Gold IL'ite

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    You need to leave him, go back to your parents and rest, beating is unexcepted you should not even spend a day alone with him. Do his parents know? Put yourself first, do not let this happen again.
     
  5. rose8282

    rose8282 Platinum IL'ite

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    Your husband is very clever. Before you could tell your parents, looks like your husband made the situation such that your father is arguing with your mom to not let you go there. Please help yourself. Take pictures of the marks on your body. This is evidence for the future. Dont let anyone know you are doing this. Show those marks to the police and take action. Try to use your phone to record voices of them illtreating you. It will come handy one day. Beating with a belt is unimaginable.
     
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  6. CHINCHILLA

    CHINCHILLA Gold IL'ite

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    Sorry to hear about your pain. But I feel something wrong with your attitude too. According to me it is very unncessary to mention about the caste here, that implies you think you did a favour by marrying him.

    BUT that doesnot mean he can hit you with a belt. At any cost don't tolerate this anymore and it is an inhumane behaviour and go to your mom's place and take rest. Don't let anyone torture you or degrade you in the name of love. If they do it then it is not true love. You should nip it at the bud otherwise it will continue forever. I feel it is equally important not to hurt anyone and at the same we need not let others hurt us in the name of love or power.
     
    Last edited: Jun 5, 2013
  7. Anitap

    Anitap IL Hall of Fame

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    Op please do this immediately.
     
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  8. nicegirlradhi

    nicegirlradhi Gold IL'ite

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    OP, really sorry for the situation you are facing. I cannot really imagine how a person who loved you for 7 years before marriage can treat you so badly like this. Shame on him and he deserves tough treatment from you. Please go to your mothers place immediately
     
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  9. KilaliAnju

    KilaliAnju Guest

    Great advice, not only take pictures go to a doctor and let him protocole there your injuries!!! do that immediately, so you have later valuable proof, a doctor can judge later too if needed how this kind of injuries happen - proof you didnt fake it or just fall down the stairs!

    Talk to your father please and inform him about your full situation, he might not be aware.

    Take actions according to get your property safe ... passport, things which belong to you...

    Never ever think about suicide, that is giving up the fight before you even start it and he will win... its not worth it..

    If he doesnt show regret or sympathy for your situation or is willing from his side to solve and apologize it will only go worse - to stop abusers from abusing means to fight them back. period.
     
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  10. shivagami

    shivagami Bronze IL'ite

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    your sufferings are one of the example for some existing lovers.....
    don't worry everything will be resolved oneday...now you are both mentally and physically not well.....as soon as possible pack up to your moms house....try to convince your father....take rest and then your both physical and mental health will be changed....after 10 to 20 days try to go to some calm place and do meditation....if you had child then you will worry that he/she will miss her father but now no problem....think positive....after recovery...then think...and decide...now you simply you spend your time in your mom house and don't hurt your parents by telling everything....no mom can bare her child is subjected to this kind of happenings...then she will not sleep at night...so be calm and take rest....you are young...educated...employed...after recovery ....then either if there is any chance or you wish ask your dh to come out from his family and keep him your control or just think that you have lost few years in your life and be self confident....then if you like you go for remarriage....ask your parents or login to matrimony....that's it...ALWAYS BELIEVE YOUR GOD....ASK HIM TO COME ALWAYS WITH YOU...GOD BLESS YOU...

    SHIVAGAMI
     

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