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Husband says i consume!!!

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Memories, Jan 31, 2013.

  1. sweetshreya

    sweetshreya IL Hall of Fame

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  2. ravsmum

    ravsmum New IL'ite

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    Pls ask ur husband about it CLEARLY.
     
  3. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Happens. Would be interesting to know what triggered him. A tough day at work, fact that you wanted to read a book, or just one of those low tolerance moments. You did good removing yourself from there.

    Husbands do understand that SAHM does a lot of work through-out the day and needs a break, but since they don't actually see the work getting done, or how thankless most of it is, sometimes insensitive comments just come out. Over time, you'll learn to mostly schedule your break time or me-time when kids and husband are not at home. :) Also, I've observed that if SAHM takes a break but is in the general area (lolling around on the sofa, for example), husband is more amenable to doing what needs to be done rather than if she goes away shopping, to read a book elsewhere etc.

    Complex beings, these husbands of SAHM's. :) Hope you've cheered up and can see his unfortunate comment in a better perspective.
     
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  4. shyamalajh

    shyamalajh Gold IL'ite

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    He seems to have said it in anger. But make sure he appreciates your position as full-time mom.I have done it for almost 2 yrs and know how hard it is. I often tell my colleagues I come to office to relax. I have very responsible position at work. Still it is not as tiring. Tell him clearly that it is not acceptable to be treated in a disrespectful manner, especially in front of kids. Ask him if he is feeling financially insecure or something? If he feels you should contribute financially? If that is the case he should just have a discussion with you. Don't let it affect you confidence or relationship. Find out what exactly he means.
     
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  5. meVaidehi

    meVaidehi Platinum IL'ite

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    Appoint a nanny for your kid/s
    A maid for cleaning, cooking, shopping (for groceries and household you enjoy your shopping!)
    Let him pay just for one month and then have another chat. Tell him now i'm consuming hows that?

    If he said it for fun or out of anger just once, you can simply tell the scenario.

    There are a few who think they are doing everything because they work for other than family and bring a pay check.

    Vaidehi
     
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  6. JASIKA

    JASIKA Bronze IL'ite

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    Tell him...you are also a consumer because i do all the hard work of cooking meals and he only eats.
     
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  7. Ajith

    Ajith Silver IL'ite

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    What is the actual word? Did he say that word (consume) in English or in your native tongue? I know it doesn't matter but when you translate, it may give a totally different meaning. You still didn't say what triggered him to say that. Asking him to feed the kid is not a reason enough to utter that word. Note: I am not condoning your husband's behavior. The fact he called you 30 times after the incident shows that he regrets saying that. Whatever you do, do not say/do anything in haste and regret later. You are the one who is going to live with your husband so make him regret his actions without offending him like he did to you.
     
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  8. helpmeangel

    helpmeangel Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Memories,

    Please let this one go. He will also be feeling guilty about the words which he uttered to you. He may have said it by mistake. On a lighter note, this may be an opportunity for you to make him take you to your favorite restaurant or buy you a nice bauble or a dress. Do not take it to heart and forgive him!
     
  9. ShilpaMa

    ShilpaMa IL Hall of Fame

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    Am sure... there would have been a counter petition in the court to save one's Son's hard earned money ;-)... or will depend on presiding judge's family story.
     
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  10. Dinny

    Dinny IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Memories
    Dont be so upset and i liked your idea of giving him 'the royal silent treatment' after what he said to you.
    ..it reminds me of a dialogue from the movie english- vinglish where Sridevi says ' i dont need love but i need respect'...so true.
    May be he said it in a fit of anger then too he doesnt have the right to say that to you..You better command respect from him....more than anyone else in the family you deserve it.
    Now that he made the mistake ...make sure he doesnt repeat it again....i mean talk to him frankly and tell him to try "Sitting" at home for one day and do everything tat u do in one day.
     

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