1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

Wife extra marital relation caught - Applying divorce - Need suggestion

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by sumaramesh, Nov 8, 2012.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Padmash

    Padmash Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,118
    Likes Received:
    524
    Trophy Points:
    208
    Gender:
    Female
    This will always be the question with your brother after your brother's divorce.. and many things will arise in future.
    Again i am not convincing to favor that girl.. but i would suggest you leave everything on your brother.. he is the one who knows himself better..
     
    3 people like this.
  2. sumaramesh

    sumaramesh New IL'ite

    Messages:
    718
    Likes Received:
    429
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear Padmavt

    I am person, who generally dont take anybody's opinion as wrong..
    But i would not agree to few of your points...

    Loopholes with my brother ?? what loopholes ?? And i dint get what you are trying to convey
    when you said "your relatives themselves will bring many issues with your brother."

    I really dont get meaning of this statement... But let me tell you this, with all this
    proofs we cant win easily, as i said, All laws are favorable to women, and they
    can turn case however they want... So legally all proofs can be made upside down...

    But socially we have very strong support, as forget about my relatives, even her side
    relatives dont like there family much, as the way she dress, her affairs, her attitude
    everyone knows, also nobody among her relative have respect for her mother too..

    Thanks a lot for your time, and for wish that he should have smoother life in future..
    I am no way offended by your opinion or reply, because you know only what i wrote
    about her, if you had seen her, and knew every minute details of what all she has done
    till date, i am sure, you yourself will tell to get rid of her...
     
  3. sumaramesh

    sumaramesh New IL'ite

    Messages:
    718
    Likes Received:
    429
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
     
    1 person likes this.
  4. sumaramesh

    sumaramesh New IL'ite

    Messages:
    718
    Likes Received:
    429
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Lawyer mentioned, court gives custody of such a young kid to mother only, esplly her kid is girl kid..

    Practically taking care of 2yrs old kid is no easy, my mom is asthma patient and recently underwent
    uterus operation, she taking care is ruled out, and once my bro re-marries not sure how will knew
    mom treat kid, so i personally feel kid is better off with its mom, ofcourse he will have to pay maintenance.
     
  5. sumaramesh

    sumaramesh New IL'ite

    Messages:
    718
    Likes Received:
    429
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear Padmavt

    People will naturally ask questions, of why we divorced, infact she will also get that question.
    My mom cried 2 whole day, that how will she face everyone, i scolded her and convinced her
    that people will talk however, and once they get new topic they will shut there mouth and
    talk about new things, and we cant be afraid of people and risk my brothers life with such a girl..

    Yes it was absolutely my brothers decision to divorce her, not mine or my parents, once
    he took this decision, and he wants ours (me n my dh) and my parents support, we are
    helping him morally and legally to get out of this... And i will defintely support my bro in this
    important stage of his life, where he is so down with all her bull....
     
  6. Padmash

    Padmash Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,118
    Likes Received:
    524
    Trophy Points:
    208
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear thanks for understanding me.. dont mind anything once you have posted the problem in open forum. First if any of your relatives or locality people are also accessing IL they are going to recognize everyone as you have a profile pics and you have mentioned her name too.
    Now coming to the point. We have faced similar situation with one of our most loved cousin brother who is the only child.. imagine only child.. So i have been through his case as he dont have any other siblings.... most importantly we are too elder to him.. this boy is really good in all respect who is completely tee totaller and lives with hsi parents.. he even couldnt have first night with his wife.. as she fought on the first day of marriage and left the house next day.. they got separated with mutual consent... of course girl's side tried to use dowry law and all ****.. Just imagine here everyone in the family knows this boy is good and girl was at the falut but those so called repsected relatives bad mouthing this boy and if any good proposals comes... they will come with a tag that such n such relative of you said such things about your son.. so i said relatives are really not important here to decide anything about your family or brother's.. after divorce relatives are the first story makers.. there will be some secret admirer of that girl you never know aboutother's mind.
    Loopholes why he really needed to drop his wife everyday at her mother's place.. you already know they come from poor family so their locality is really not good enough for his wife and daughter who are now a part of good family??? He could have left them at your aprents place or they can stay home too .. with a kid you have a lot of work to do at home.. he was so wrong to everyday leave them there.. there must be something you dont know exactly what is happening between the couple..
    I really dont find your brother socially strong here as they have a kid.. he enever doubted his wife earlier.. all doubts arised only after the call.. why he never got suspicious.. there are many things which makes spouse suspicious.. getting drunk for any reason is not that good.. If your family talk about her bad family background it may work against you.. most importantly whatever you do.. dont let anyone know including your relatives who are not of any help.. i dont think everyone can help you with this case.
    Yes you are correct even with so many proof it will be difficult to win if this girl too get a good lawyer. You got a statment in front of police from that girl... this can be said as she was threatened to do so.. dowry law is the worst thing here.. but you have bailed out yourself already so you all are secured. Don't stick with one lawyer get in touch with many who are not at all related to you.. lawyers can't be trusted if you are from a well to do family and they know it.. se if that girl agree this case will get over in 9-10months but if you fight thisin family court.. believe me it will be a torture to your parents and brother too..
    Here, if you are going through divorce process keep everyone including closed relatives unaware of the developments.. only person who needed physically and legally should be aware of all the developments.. divorce witha young kid and a poor family young girl is like palying with fire.. so try to be safer thinking all the loopholes in your case(if you find).. delete her name from your post.. when such cases are going on in family then opposite party try to follow you to all endsss... hopefully your family finds some peace soon..
     
    1 person likes this.
  7. curlytweethere

    curlytweethere Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,237
    Likes Received:
    2,367
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    Why are you ruling out the option of the kid with the father?
    If he wants the kid let him take the custody. In this situation it would be better rather than the being with such mom. It is not safe for the kid to grow up in his mother's environment.
    Also why are you in such a hurry for your brother's remarriage? Divorce is a long process.
    If your brother wants to have the kid and feels responsible then he can marry a girl who can accept the kid once his divorce is through
     
    2 people like this.
  8. sumaramesh

    sumaramesh New IL'ite

    Messages:
    718
    Likes Received:
    429
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Gender:
    Female

    I am not ruling out option, I told law wont permit infant girl kid with father..

    And did i say you that we are looking girl for him ???? I know divorce is long process...
    I just said, my personal opinion is, its better kid be with mom, coz his future wife will
    definitely not take care, as good as its own mom....
     
  9. Padmash

    Padmash Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,118
    Likes Received:
    524
    Trophy Points:
    208
    Gender:
    Female
    how can you ask anyone to stay out of thread.. i didn't posted anything wrong to you or anyother IL.. if you can't digest what other says then why you have put this case elaborated with revealing the identities in the open forum.. grow up dear, realize it really divorce is like palying with fire..
    Most importantly i am least interested in your case and people know me too well here..
    So dont take it personally.. i have mention you asked for the opinion we gave you..
    why you need only sympathetic or good opinion..
    you dont have to request moderators .. i myself dont want to step in your thread..
    this is really worst thing to provoke anyone for divorce for any reason..
    u never know the future..
     
    2 people like this.
  10. Endlesshope

    Endlesshope Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    657
    Likes Received:
    1,318
    Trophy Points:
    263
    Gender:
    Female
    Op- since the woman has been sleeping around, if you havent ardy,get the child DNA tested , just to make sure she is your brother's biological kid.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page