The Art of Turning Deaf - Compilation of Ideas

swt.charu - haha! if that is true, can I send mine to see her twin sister for a month or so??? I can afford a breather right now!!!

 

aha smart girl ... but yes I agree you deserve a breather during your initial years of marriage... i dont mind .. bring em on !!!

 

Hi Guys,

Actually more than anything, we dont have to pay attention to whatever they tell about us outside. Atleast i get myself occupied with lot of classes, office, kid and DH, after coming back would just cook and go read some books. I wont even give her time to talk to me, I would just remain busy always (atleast act if not so busy). Just go do gardening, painting, jewellery making even in my leisure time, would just tell her that i would complete and talk to her. I just make sure that i tell her that her food is awesome when she cooks, that she maintains the house so well, (atleast she has the gesture to offer me a cup of coffee when i come back from work), and so on. I generally do not talk much, and i avoid talking to her.

Whenever she has some issues with someone else, i would just listen to her and remain silent. She ofcourse has problems with me, but i would never give importance to it. I would just be doing whatever i want, either remaining silent or moving off from that place.

If my MIL complains to my DH, and if my DH was asking me questions, i would turn the house upside down to clean. Sometimes, cleaning gives me lot of relief I would not answer back. Offlate, he started knowing that I do not want to pick up fights or arguements, and he knows i'm dead against it. He is not asking me anything now. I do not know whether he answers back my MIL.

 

Oh.. It sounds so similar. Sometimes she is so nice that even my mom would not have been so nice to me in my life and some days are just bad .

Yesterday she was in such a good mood but today i am just afraid to go home because my maid didnt turn up today, i came office early and she had to do all plates and cleaning shakehead shakehead

 

I loved each one's responses here,

Actually I have mastered the "Art of turning deaf" may be I could have even done my doctorate if my MIL was still alive.

It was terrible when she was handling the kitchen and me her assistant as I had to do whatever as per her instruction, but when I took care of the kitchen she use to stand behind instructing that days menu, so the trick I learnt was to finish half the cooking even before she enters the kitchen, even then she use to try her best to change but I use to show a sorry face :thumbsdownpointing at the cooker that it has already been done... still she wont let go asking me to keep it for the next day and do what she wants.... at this... I simply use to continue my cooking as if I have not heard her... calling my DD.. asking her some irrelevant question's to which even my DD use wonder as to what happened to me so when she knew this wont work she stopped entering the kitchen... which was a great relief to me..

there were one instance when she said she will eat food prepared only by her and not cooked by me.... so she use to cook after I finished cooking and even laid for them on the table... the funniest part was she made even my FIL eat her cooking...:bonk all I did was just ignored and gave the left overs to our maid... she expected me to beg her to eat... I didnt bother... she thot DH will support her.. but he was to busy with work not knowing whats happening at home... finaly she gave up after 3 days when nothing was working for her :bowdown

When she use to criticize my parents on phone to her sisters or other relatives , I leave the place immediately , it is better not to hear her nonsense... but I make it a point to praise about my parents on phone (when my sisters or friends call) when she is around...I talk loudly that I am so lucky to have such a mother... my father is my idol, we are such lucky daugters:rotfl I know she will go mad hearing this... but some times even I love to irritate her...

 

Your MIL were long lost sisters of course. I didn't really assist her, but the moment I entered the kitchen, she would come behind me, and start giving instructions on what vessels to use, what not to use, sils would do the same thing too. I was not even allowed to touch the crockery that my parents had gifted. I eventually learnt to ignore :cheers (but it took a long time).

 

DH says my wife writes food blogs, MIL says SIL makes more varieties of dishes - I say wow she too must start writing blogs like me then !

SIL has a very bad mil - don't worry all DILs have horrible MILs these days

SIL's place has best schools in the world - wow I can send my kids to her place then !

SIL has good dressing sense,beautifies house,keeps kitchen clean - wow a lot like my mom

SIL cares for her mil so much(what???staying 10,000 miles away from her mil?) - don't worry I'll also take care of you JUST like her only I know what I meant !

SIL looks young and beautiful - Good she has so much free time to take care of herself !

MIL stops boasting to me and starts her boasting session to my mom....Though I feel bad for my mom, Iam happy I got spared

 

It irritates so much when one is behind your back and instructs you how to do things.....My MIL loves to command..

DS is hungry feed him (when i am already serving DS on a plate)... Give him a bath he is all sweaty..(When I am already taking him for a bath).... She has to instruct me even when I am doing it.. God knows what happiness she gets.. I have to ask her what to cook and how to cook..

She has to have a comment for everything...She asks me something and when I tell her she will say no I will do my way.. So now a days I started saying "do as you wish" (Ofcourse in a nice manner) and walk away from there... She is not liking it...maybe bcos she cant oppose or correct me...and I love it when she gets irritated..

Have to master the "art of turning deaf" ..but its difficult to ignore when she is like that 24/7..

 

I have 2+ yr old and 1+ yr old kids,
Mil is here in my house , apart from taking care of kids use to take care of other work ,something in computer say attest for a hour or two at night time after kids sleep,all mil does is eat ,comes to kitchen on perfect timings have food , sit on sofa.
I was planning on going to our small business place along with kids and wow mil says you should cook curries fresh every day, I replied in fact I wanted to cook once in two since I will be out with kids , next day she went to my co- sister place ,some how we all met outside at some shopping center , mil asks me what curry I prepared , I said nothing , I have yesterday's leftovers, after a while she asks me if I have to cook curry after I go home , it was around 6:00 pm or so , I replied no we would eat outside and go. And she left with co-sister and family , we came to our house .when she came back to my house after 2-3 days she asks me what we did for dinner on that shopping day. I said I do not remember.she stayed for 4 days went away and again when she came back to my it was Monday evening , she knows Sunday I did not cook any thing got food from outside , infact on Monday too got some food from outside , now while I was frying bread on that Monday night and my mil asks me what curry I made on day before yesterday that is Saturday .. .. I was like people ask what curry you made on that day and certainly not about the other days , when I said the same to my dh , wow his reply was , so you do not like when my mom has conversation with you.