AM I right or Am I wrong part -2

kritka · Jul 13, 2012

Dear All

I posted this thread just to tell you that these days I have become more independant and not hubby hubby types. my huubby usually comes very late like 9 from office so waiting for him is like a never ending process.morever he doesnt like that calling -and asking what are u doing etc all the time so I have given him space .Infact a lot of space . earlier I use to get bothered at small things like even I cook at home he will get something from here and there without telling me so it spoils my mood y the hell I cooked and he should tell me and all .
If he is not interested in any tie ups etc why should I be so bothered about it I mean I dont know right or wrong only being a third person u can say and put up some points .
I recently watched movie alone outisde my self and told my hubby that I will be late.He was just ok .Otherwise things are quite fine with us I mean if u consider sex or his giving me money to run the house etc
So this non expressive nature should be done away with or I should be a left to right women always saying that he has to eat home cooked food etc .What should I do ? Given him space ............please reply

Thanks

subhejamal · Jul 13, 2012

hi dear,give it sometime and continue with it.dont expect too much.if he is ok then enjoy it and share it with him what you did.sometimes we have to show the wrong side of our feelings.i feel men r like childern,when you ignore them they feel it v quickly,but t hey dont complain as quickly they feel it.i know that husband who seems to have a deaf ear to wifes non stop talkng,he asks if you are ok,when she starts keeping quiet.a few days out can provide both of you a little relief,but in the long run only,it can show its real effect.even then he might be reluctant in openly admitting that he has started missing you and wants your attention like before so also watch for the signs.donot take it to the revenge form.be there for him but not all the time.sometimes leave him alone,sometimes try to control you emotions and talk to him like he does.

chicagoadithic · Jul 13, 2012

give him space... enjoy ur own... but dont lose the bond between you... indulge in somethings together. i am sure one day you will gel well....

HasiniS · Jul 13, 2012

@kritka

subhejamal has pointed out everything ... Just to add to it ... You just need to give space for himself as well as to an extent accept him as what he is. So what ever you said like ignoring him, or you going to movie alone ... do it if you really enjoy. Cause to change our spouse if you start changing yourself ... then one day you might get lost and not know what you are upto... My guy used to have friends ( girls ) ... he used to talk to them even in late night ... this was even after when we got married ... when i first said i didnt like it we used to have argument. But then just because I trusted him and I thought may be in this he is bit immatured and doesnt understands my feelings I just gave him some space for himself and just tried to not take that into my mind ... Believe me even now he asks me " how did you take all that cool ... I am sure I wouldn't have been as cool as you, if it was you talking to any guy late night " and says he was too kiddish at times to have done crazy things So I would just say , you enjoy being yourself and just give him some space to realize that all you need from him is just simple considerations and not weird ones like handing the moon on your hands ;-)

GMReddy · Jul 13, 2012

as suggested by others, understand the person's nature...and express your feelings to him...see whether you both are in sync or not...
find out what are his expectations...see whether he does things deliberately or by nature he is so...
do not assume things about him...confirm with him whatever you are thinking about him...
understanding the person and closing the gap as far as possible is the way to go...
best of luck...