Crab lice on my infant's eyelashes - how to convey to IL's?!

thekumars9308 · Jul 14, 2011

This is a very embarrassing situation. I'm sorry if it is TMI but I need help, please. About a month ago, I found crab lice (generally called pubic lice, occasionally found on eyelashes, eyebrows & male breast hair) on my then 7 month old baby's eyelashes and cleared it up. Then after a few days found another on her hand, cleared that too. I haven't found any since then but every now and then I find one or two head louse on her head. I'm aware that my MIL has lots of louse and nits on her head and after finding crab lice on my baby's eyelash my DH and I have been asking her to comb her hair regularly to clear the louse away and she has been doing it but not very often to clear everything away.

Only yesterday I found out that there exists something called crab lice and I'm totally grossed out. I made my DH aware of this type of lice. I suspect it might have come to my baby from my FIL while he puts her to sleep on his chest. Btw, DH and I don't have any louse and my baby didn't have any until in-laws came to our house.

My question is how can we communicate this to my in-laws as this is a very delicate issue? I'm pretty sure they will deny it as my MIL said earlier that there are only a couple of louse on her head and that my baby must have it on her head by herself. Or should I just leave it as is and just hope and pray that they don't infest my baby for the next one month? In-laws, baby and me are going to India in a month. How do I handle this? Please help me.

SriVidya75 · Jul 14, 2011

if you have already told your MIL about combing her hair daily...why not try to get some effective medicine that clears all lice?? am sur eyou will get some good stuff here over the counter.

also let your husband talk to your FIL and say that you guy swill put baby to sleep going forward till this lice issue is solved as doctor has suggested you both as parents to keep a close eye on the baby to check as to how is she getting lice on her hands or head. (make doctor as the reason why you want to keep baby away from them for a while) let your husband do the talking to his parents.

coming to India trip..how are you planning to avoid all this ? are you planning to go n live with your parents?? if you are planning to be with your inlaws the same issue will be repeated again, what does your husband say about this.....only he is the person who can take a stand on this..odesnt matter how much ever you worry, he has to come with a solution and suggestion and communicate it to his parents. because if you happen to do the talking, things will be blown out of proportion.

First of all try to check for an over the counter medicinal shampoos (I remember seeing it in walgreens) for head lice.....let your MIL have headbath with that couple of times. if it works well, give her that shampoo to take to india also.

flowerlady · Jul 14, 2011

How terrible ! Mediker is sold here as an anti louse shampoo and its very effective .
Your DH can tell his parents that the Doctor has recommended anti-louse treatment for the entire family for the sake of the baby.
Its hard to believe that grown up people have such no sense of personal hygiene .
Do something , just combing is not effective.

thekumars9308 · Jul 15, 2011

Thank you SriVidhya and Flowerlady for your response. I have already looked for anti-lice shampoo but couldn't find any in my local stores and no Mediker or Kenz in Indian stores as well but why didn't I think about Walgreens? :bonk Anyways thanks for reminding. I will look in Walgreens.

If it is just head lice anti-lice shampoo will be the solution but if it is crab lice the shampoo wont work. I have googled regarding the same. Without seeing one on them I cannot really prove that's she got it from them and they won't even accept it in the first place. If they accept only then can I ask them to treat it. They will feel ashamed of accepting it and just simply say they don't have it. Yes, even I felt extremely angry that such grown up people are so negligent about personal hygiene. They are definitely very nice people but for cleanliness and hygiene. That really makes me mad.

My husband feels really delicate talking about this to them. Same thing again, we cannot prove it to them if they are gonna deny.

mridusudha · Jul 15, 2011

Why don't you say that the doctor has advised "every member of the household" to use extra personal hygiene and cleanliness. Don't single out your in-laws instead even you and your DH also follow strict personal hygiene.

I am sure you already googled but I got this link
Pubic Lice (Crabs) Symptoms, Causes, Treatment - How are pubic lice treated on MedicineNet

Also don't take this lightly. You need to make sure that your child is not infected!!!

Hope this helps!

flowerlady · Jul 15, 2011

You can also lay down rules for personal hygiene saying that the Doctor is suggesting it. If you visit a Doctor he will definitely ask the whole family to get deloused.
Apart from the lice , hope they are taking care of other aspects of personal hygiene. Entrusting a baby to people who have body lice sounds repelling ,however nice they may be.
Hope this is not an indication of other dirty habits.
This is not to scare you but an alert for the health of your kid.

SriVidya75 · Jul 15, 2011

its understandable that your husband is not able to tell his parents...as it would sound as if you guys are accusing them of something.....

so good thing here is...say doctor said that you both have to keep your kid under observation...and that doctor told to follow somethings......give that antilice shampoo and tell your MIL and FIL to use that...also there are pharmacists in walgreens who will suggest over the counter stuff if they think it is curable n something not so serious...so ask them. tell them you first want to figure out a over the counter way...if it exists..if not you will consult the doc .

start steamcleaning your carpets...and also wash all the baby stuff alternate days...dont use the same blanket next day...also remember to tell your FIL to have a bath with soaps like margo or hamam that way some of these stuff will go away...just buy those soaps an dlet him use that...you also have lifebuoy!!!!!

ask your husband to give doctor as the bahaana and make them do all this...tell them that if you dont take these precautions, you guys might end up spending more money on the treatment and docs etc..etc.....hopefully atleast when they hear $$$$ they might cooperate

parvathi1980 · Jul 15, 2011

I just read up on crab lice on Wikipedia. These are found in genitals of adults and r also known as pubic lice so it is unlikely that mediker would help. I think you need to take your inlaws to the doctor and start treatment immediately.

flowerlady · Jul 15, 2011

This is not a small matter but babys health is at risk due to unhealthy hygiene.
Your H should act surprised and say that he found some bug on the kid and the doctor has called the entire family for check up.
Dont accuse anyone as this will spoil relationship but take PILs for a check up and get them treated.
You and H could also become hosts to crab lice as all are staying together in the same house and taking care of baby.
Its not a matter of shame , all towels , clothes should be treated with detol added in the final rinse whenever clothes are washed.
Better safe than sorry . If DH still wants to act coy then you have to take matters in your own hands and visit a doctor.

thekumars9308 · Jul 16, 2011

Thanks for the suggestions everyone! I am already doing their laundry separately. They stay in a different bedroom and don't use our bed, towels, clothes, comb, etc. They have their own things and I clean their combs regularly. I vacuum the floor every other day. I am doing everything on my end to make sure my baby is in safe and clean environment. The only thing lacking is acceptance and co-operation from their end. For which I guess "on doctor's advice treatment for the whole family" is a good way to treat them.

Personal hygiene is something that cannot be taught to grown ups and it makes it all the more difficult if they are not receptive and simply don't want to accept because they feel that affects their dignity. We have our baby's routine check coming up the following week. I can use that opportunity and say doctor suggested treatment for everybody in the house.